The Pure and the Tainted
by snakepit
Summary: Did you hear about the new kid hanging out with Axel? Shouldn't we warn him? [AU. Fluff. Future lemons. Yaoi. RoxasAxel/AxelRoxas. Side pairings.]
1. Fatal Attraction

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 1: Fatal Attraction

* * *

_Roxas, we're moving and that is that._

_Pack your bags, now._

_Quit crying – I don't want to hear it._

_Aren't you a man?_

Roxas bolted awake in the darkness of his unfamiliar bedroom. This was the third night in a row he had nightmares about the move. At least, he would tell you they were nightmares. Moving in general was a nightmare. He had left his best friend's behind; Olette, Hayner and Pence. Every hour was agonizing that he knew he wouldn't see them again.

Sighing, he reached for his glasses on the nightstand and slid them on with trembling hands. He scanned the room for his neon numbers. 5:13; and judging by the dim sunlight shining through his dirty window it was morning.

He figured he might as well get up and prepare for his first day of school. Destiny High; he had heard good things about it but it didn't stop the churn in his stomach as he feared the worst.

He quickly undressed and stepped into the scolding shower; eager to burn off any memory of Twilight Town off of his skin and memory.

_Today is a new day_, he thought to himself as he scrubbed himself raw.

He lived here now, in Destiny Islands with his uncle Cloud and his son Sora. It wasn't that he minded living with them, he and Sora were like brothers as a matter of fact, but Cloud was ruthless sometimes. Only sometimes. Though it scared the two boys to take the risk of opening up to him.

As for Roxas's parents, they disowned him when he was a child. He had nightmares about them as well, almost every night. He could tell you piece by piece the exact moment he saw his mother's eyes fill with nothing but hate for him as they locked up their burning home to ensure Roxas had no way out.

Roxas shuddered as his feet hit the cold floor. He didn't wait to dress himself in his warm black hoodie and his dryer fresh denim jeans. He hurried to brush his hair and let it air dry the rest of the morning. He stepped out of the bathroom to find Cloud watching the news and filling out bills in the livingroom.

"Hey," Roxas stood at the end of the hallway and looked at anything but Cloud's eyes. He adjusted his bookbag strap to fit his liking before slipping it on. "I'm headed to school."

Cloud set his glasses on the coffee table and rose to pat Roxas on the shoulder.

"Alright, get there safely; and put your hood on," he slipped it on for Roxas, "it's freezing out there." Roxas nodded and ruffled the top of his hood in agreement. "Is Sora awake? Is he ready?"

Roxas shook his head. "He graduated, remember?"

Cloud only sighed and rubbed his eyes. "Yeah, yeah… I remember. Sorry." He sat back in his seat and began scribbling on a sheet of paper. "Well, get going. You don't want to be late for your first day of school do you?"

What a cliché question.

"No. I'm off." With a wave he headed out of the door to be hit by an icy gust of wind.

He had memorized most of the town, especially the way to his school. It wasn't a long walk. It was only three blocks away to be exact; but the bitterness in the weather was making this walk absolutely agonizing.

.*+*+*.

He sighed with relief when a blob of yellow came into sight. That mean school buses were near, and they were parked and he could finally get some warmth.

He tread his tired feet up the long parking lot. Kids were already piling off of buses and hanging out around the main entrance. Of course, no one knew Roxas and he knew no one. He nipped at the inside of his mouth and lip nervously, trying to snake his way through the crowded hallway he had just entered. He knew that Destiny Islands only had at most 1,000 people resided but considering the school was small and it was probably filled with 600 kids, it seemed like a crowd.

He went in a circle twice before taking notice of the giant and obvious sign that said "Office". He eternally groaned from his stupidity and made his way.

After getting his schedule verified and approved he was told to wait for the student council to arrive.

Only 10 minutes passed before a tall silver headed boy entered the room only resided by Roxas and another teacher.

"Are you Roxas?" he was standing in front of him with a welcoming smile but regardless his overly toned body made Roxas nervous.

"Y-yeah." He stood up from his seat and took the offered hand in his and shook.

"I'm Riku, the student council. I'm here to show you to all of your classes."

Roxas nodded before handing him a copy of his schedule.

"Art for home room, huh? Lucky you." he motioned for Roxas to follow him, leading him through all the narrow halls that were now empty.

"Class has already started but you'll be fine to show up late, it is your first day."

After showing him around from classes, to the gym and café, he lead him back to his homeroom class.

"Think you got it?"

Roxas nodded again before taking his copy.

"Well I'm here if you need anything. Just find me in the office, I'm usually there. If not then leave Mrs. Aerith a message and I'll find you."

"Okay, thanks for the help, Riku." He offered a smile before turning into the classroom.

His stomach dropped at the usual routine. All eyes were turned to him; most at least. A small group of kids didn't seem to care in the least and resumed chattering without paying Roxas any mind. He was thankful for even that at the least.

"Who are you?" a short woman sat at the front of the class in her computer desk.

"I'm Roxas." He began to walk towards the woman before she halted him.

"Okay, just take a seat where you like."

Roxas's heart raced with anxiety. He hated this. Being the new kid. Being in the spotlight. It was gut wrenching. The entire class fell quiet and everyone was staring at him.

A soft tug on his sleeve lured him to turn around. A petite blond girl sat behind him with her small hands wrapped around his wrist.

"Sit here, with us." She offered a friendly smile.

He glanced at the people she was sitting with before taking an available seat next to her. As soon as he sat all of the chattering in the room began again.

Roxas took a deep sigh of relief, obviously uneasy.

"Thanks." He smiled back to her as he adjusted in the new seat.

"No problem. I'm Namine. This is Aqua," she pointed to a blue headed girl who gave Roxas a quick smile before burying her face into the book she held, "this is my sister, Xion," she now pointed to another petite girl with black hair who waved shyly at Roxas, "we're twins," she added, "this is Demyx." she again averted her index finger, now to a boy with an unusual blond mohawk who was lazily texting. He paid no mind to Roxas or Namine. "He's nice even if it doesn't show." She rolled her eyes and slapped her hand playfully on an empty desk. "And this is Axel – if he'd ever show." She gave an obviously forced smile to Roxas who only raised his brow, unsure of what to really say.

"There are some others who we'll introduce you to when class is over, okay?" her genuine smile returned, "No one likes to be alone on their first day, right?"

.*+*+*.

Class was finally over and Namine held Roxas by the wrist as she dragged him and her sister through the crowded hallways. Aqua and Demyx said goodbye at the doorway moments ago and went into the other direction. Something about those two made Roxas think he wasn't so welcome.

"Axel!" the blond girl eagerly jogged over to a boy with bright red hair who was rummaging through a locker. She tugged Roxas along with her.

Two sharp verdant eyes locked firmly with Roxas's. He internally cowered, making sure to stay behind the girl he was familiar to.

"Hey, Namine." He stuffed a bag into his locker and shut it before turning to face the three.

"Axel, this is Roxas," she stepped to the side, leaving Roxas vulnerable in his gaze, "Roxas, this is Axel."

The red head adjusted his weight onto one leg and crossed his arms, "Nice to meet you, Roxas."

"Likewise." He mumbled before averting to gaze to the wall. Anything but those eyes.

"Oh, so you've heard?" Axel sneered. His gaze turned even darker.

"Axel! Don't." Namine lightly shoved her hands against him with no sole purpose than to hush him. Xion's face even showed signs of worry before she mumbled something and made her way through the crowd of kids.

"Heard what?"

"Nothing!" Namine jumped between the two boys. "Nothing that you need to hear about." Her tone turned cold but her nervous smile baffled him. He looked up to the lime eyes with confusion but figured it be best to let it go. He nodded slowly before glancing at the clock across the hallway.

"Shouldn't we get to class?"

Namine nodded frantically before she took a hold of Roxas's wrist again and followed the path Xion had taken. Roxas could feel Axel's glare on the back of his head but refused to look back..

*+*+*.

After his fourth period, it was time for lunch. The café was crowded with students and Roxas scanned the room for Namine who didn't seem to be there.

"Roxas." He turned to face Riku, with relief.

"Hey, Riku."

He motioned for Roxas to follow him and led him to a table of far too many people.

"Let me introduce you to some friends. He performed the same ritual that Namine had done, pointing to person after person.

"Kairi, Vexen, Larxene and my sister, Aqua."

He smiled at the girl he had already met.

"We've already met. We're in the same homeroom." She finally locked eyes with Roxas and returned his smile.

"I didn't think you two would be siblings."

Riku only nodded with a faint smile, "I wish we weren't."

He sarcastically sneered to his sister and she rolled her eyes and shot him the bird before returning her gaze to a book again.

"So have you made any other friends yet?" Riku crossed his arms and held a inquisitive look on his face.

"Yeah," he searched the café and finally caught sight of bright red hair, followed by the other friends he had made today sitting on the other side of the large room. "I met them. Namine, Xion, Axel… and Demysx, I think his name was."

He looked back to Aqua who looked tense more than ever.

"You two, I fucking swear." He shot a cold glare to his sister. "You should leave those guys alone."

Roxas wrinkled his brows. "Why?"

"Because they're fucking freaks. Axel is a fucking m-"

"Riku, enough!" the blue haired girl slammed her hands onto the table and jogged over to Roxas, taking a hold of his wrist and tugging him viciously away from earshot.

She led him towards his former friends and gave a look to Namine to signal her over, to which she did.

"What's wrong?" she gave a worried glance to Roxas.

"Can you go sit with Xion and the others? I need to talk to Namine."

Roxas awkwardly nodded before taking a careful seat next to Xion were Namine was sitting. He watched as the two girls gossiped quietly to one another, hunching closer. He heard Namine gasp and mumble "Oh no." before looking back at her friends.

Axel sighed deeply before pushing his food away and burying his face in his folded arms on the table. Demyx placed a hand on his shoulder and began to whisper something in his friend's ear. Roxas tried to eavesdrop but Xion abruptly started chattering in his ear.

"So where are you from?"

He retreated from trying to listen and turned his attention to Xion. "Twilight Town."

"Oh!" she quickly turned to Axel who shot her a dark glare. "Did you know Axel?" she slowly looked back to Roxas who was shaking his head.

"That's good… I mean, you two are friends now." she awkwardly chuckled before ruffling her own hair.

Roxas slowly nodded, a bit confused and creeped out at the situation.

Aqua finally broke away from Namine with a nod. Namine took an extra seat from a vacant table and sat it behind Axel, mumbling to him as quietly as she could. Roxas only looked at his feet and shuffled quietly in his chair.

"…he's new here, he won't understand."

"But Axel, he's either going to hear it from you or someone else."

He didn't enjoy being talked about in third person.

"I'll tell him soon… before someone else does, I guess."

The lunch bell rang.

"Oh no! You didn't even have time to eat." Namine gave a concerned look to Roxas.

"It's fine, I'm not hungry." He reassured her with a smile and rose, hooking an arm through his bag and slipping it on again.

_Do you see the new kid with Axel?_

_Should we tell him?_

_I don't know. Maybe he already knows._

_It's dangerous, though, someone should tell him._

_It was only his parents, though. That was years ago. Maybe he changed._

He heard two kids mumbling somewhere nearby but he couldn't make it out. His concentration was interrupted when a tall figure snapped in his face.

"Earth to Roxas." Axel crossed his arms.

"Yeah? Sorry, I spaced out."

Axel rolled his eyes. "Let me take you out to lunch since it's my fault you missed yours."

"How is it your fault?" he followed the red head who was already walking towards an exit of the café.

"You're getting caught up in my gossip. It's the least I can do."

.*+*+*.

Axel escorted Roxas to a small diner across the street, assuring Roxas that seniors were allowed to leave and it's not like anyone would notice the new kid was missing on his first day anyway.

They sat now as Axel attempted to choke his food down again and Roxas nibbled on a cucumber sandwich.

"So why does everyone talk about you?"

Roxas could hear Axel's breath hitch and his body tensed. He sighed through his nose before placing his food down and locking gazes with bright blue eyes.

.*+*+*.

Axel's POV

Axel looked up at those confused oceans for eyes. Sighing, he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You lived in Twilight Town, right? Before this?"

Roxas nodded.

"How long?"

"My whole life."

Axel nodded, feeling his stomach twist.

_How did he not hear about me, then? Maybe he doesn't realize who I am._

"I…" Axel began but choked on his words. Clearing his throat, he started over.

"I did something, a long time ago."

_To my parents._

"I… had to protect myself."

_I was laughing when they found me._

"It got to the news…"

_I didn't leave a trace._

"And everyone here found out. They had to warn everyone of me."

_They were going to kill me._

Axel sunk his head into his hands and resisted the urge to scream from frustration.

"I'm not what people make me to be. No matter what you hear, I'm not the monster people will tell you I am." Axel's heart pounded in his ear as he watched the curious blue eyes staring at him.

"I just can't tell you… I really can't. I'm sorry" Axel rose and before Roxas had a chance to stop him, he was swiftly out of the door and making his way back to the school, leaving the confused blond to hear it from someone else.

He stuffed his hands into his hoodie pocket and blinked away the tears wetting the corner of his eyes.

He didn't have the heart for this. He wasn't a monster. Something about Roxas made him feel as if he was. As if he would be one if he told Roxas. If he knew…

_When he finds out…_

_What will I do then?_

* * *

Author Notes

I know it seems kind of fast to jump into the storyline but I'm going to make it work - trust me, it will be dramatic.

This is one of the best ideas I've brewed up for an Axel/Roxas fanfic. I'm going to really take a lot of time on this, so if you like it please follow it to get updates and leave reviews and favorite. It'd be much appreciated.


	2. Aegis Demons

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 2: Aegis Demons

* * *

Axel's POV

Axel held a glare with the school's main entrance for a while before retreating back to his apartment. Nothing but anxiety wracked his body when Roxas was around him. A call to Demyx should have done the trick, but long after the call was over it still rang loudly in his head.

"_He's going to find out some day. Not by me. I don't know what to do. I don't know what it is with that kid, but I just don't think I can handle those big fucking eyes staring at me. I can't handle it, Dem."_

Roxas's POV

Lucky for Roxas, Axel had paid for the food ahead of time because he was broke.

Sighing, he picked up the trash and threw it away. When he stepped out he could see Axel hurrying off somewhere. Not back to school, though. Tempting as it was, he decided to just leave him alone. Whatever this is that's going on is obviously none of his business and it's fine by him not to get involved. He made his way back to the school grounds and ended up getting lost in the hallways.

His heart finally released its tight compression when he saw the bright blue hair jogging by.

"Aqua!"

She halted in mid jog.

"Oh, hey, Roxas," she peered at him with suspicion, "everything okay?"

He nodded but wrinkled his brow, "Well, no." He held out his schedule. "I have no idea where this class is… do you think-"

"Yeah, I can show you." She completely turned around and motioned for Roxas to follow her.

"So how do you like it here so far?"

Roxas hesitated to answer honestly. He held a hand to the back of his head and smiled sheepishly, "Honestly…" an awkward chuckle, "I have no idea. Everyone seems to be caught up in Axel."

She smiled sadly, "I wish I could tell you but I don't want to be the one to hurt him."

"What do you mean?"

She opened her mouth to speak but her breath hitched.

"It's hard to say." Aqua held her head down and halted, tugging Roxas's sleeve to stop him.

"Roxas, Axel… he…" she sighed and looked as if she was trying to find the right words. "He- ugh, fuck!"

She fell backwards and slammed herself against a locker, "I don't know how to fucking say it, Roxas."

"It's okay… you don't have to tell me." Roxas backed up a few steps to give her room to breathe.

"I know Riku will tell you," she glared at him now, "whatever he tells you… just… Axel isn't a bad guy. He's a really good guy. He's a better brother than Riku has ever been and…" her eyes suddenly got darker, "I can tell he likes you, he's going to try to put himself out."

Roxas nodded and looked away; slightly fearing for his life right about now.

_This school is fucking weird._

Right about now he just wanted to go home.

"Forget it, let's get you to class." Roxas flinched when she shoved herself off of the lockers but she paid him no mind and led him to his class.

"Thank y-"

She had already stormed off. Roxas let out a exasperated sigh before entering the new classroom. Demyx sat in the corner of the room, alone, and Roxas swore he prayed for mercy in that moment. Again, all eyes on him.

"New student?" a built man with dark hair slowly approached him with his hand held out. Roxas filled it with his schedule, received a nod and was told again to sit where he pleases. He sat across from Demyx on a whim.

The blond shot him a strange glare before laughing it off.

"Don't act so wound up," he whispered over the man talking, "what's got you looking like that?"

Roxas took a minute to observe himself mentally, "What? Like what?"

"Like you've just seen a ghost." Demyx leaned over his desk slightly to get in better earshot.

"I don't know… everyone here is strange."

Demyx chuckled before nodding, "That we are. So what is it?"

Roxas only shrugged, not caring to humor the subject of Axel any longer though he had a feeling that he already knew.

"So," the dark haired man now stood beside the two boys with a clipboard in hand, "your name must be Roxas. Last name?"

"Hikari."

"Hikari? You're not blood to Cloud Strife by any chance?"

Roxas nodded, "He's my uncle."

"You don't say?" the man grinned.

"Who are you?"

"You can call me Mr. Fair, or Zack, or both. Whichever you'd like."

Roxas's eyes widened, "He told me about you! You two are like brothers."

Zack nodded, "Yeah, we've had our adventure together." The grin on his face widened as he looked off for a moment, "But that's all over. I came here to work with my wife. I haven't heard from Cloud in years. It's been a while since I've seen you, too. Since you were a baby. How is Sora?"

"He's well. I actually live with them both; if you ever want to stop by I can give you our address."

Zack nodded and Roxas pulled out his notebook to search for address, writing a copy of it down on a slip of paper.

"Thanks," he folded it and slipped it into his pocket, "maybe I'll stop by soon. And how are you?"

Roxas hesitated, not sure if he knew about his parents or not.

"I'm fine, I'm doing okay. We just moved here a week ago."

Zack nodded with some kind of acknowledgement before walking off before bellowing to the class to get back to work. Roxas looked up to see Demyx texting again.

"Are you allowed to text in class?"

"Seniors are. We don't have all that much work to do. I already finished mine up. Speaking of which, what's your number?"

Roxas blinked before fumbling around in his book bag. He wasn't sure if he wanted anyone to have his number; but then again, what would it hurt?

He went ahead and gave it over.

"Alright, Axel wants it, too."

His heart instantly began throbbing.

"Is it okay if I give it to him? If not just tell me, I'll make an excuse."

Roxas shook his head, "No, go ahead. I don't mind." He tried to fake a smile.

"Alright." Demyx shrugged before lowering his head to text again. "Done. Expect a text from me and him."

.*+*+*.

A sudden shudder went through him as he thought of an idea. He pulled his phone back out and searched his contacts for Hayner.

_Hayner I need u to do me a favor_

Moments went by before he got a response.

_What?_

_I need u to look up someone for me. His name is Axel. He used to live there. Will u look up his name?_

_I won't be free til Wednesday but I'll do it asap. Whats up with this guy_

Today was Friday. He'd have to wait a whole week.

_Something is just off about him. Thnx that will have to do_

It will have to do. Roxas had no other choice. Trying to look it up himself was too much of a risk, especially with everyone hawking him.

"Texting Axel?"

Roxas shot his head up, "No, a friend." He gave a nervous smile before deleting the messages and shoving his phone back into his bag.

"Huh," Demyx put his own phone down finally, "Well there's a talent show coming up on Monday. Do you want to come and watch me?"

Roxas grinned, "You? What are you going to do?"

"Tch, I can do anything." Demyx pouted, "I'll surprise you."

Roxas shrugged, "Fine. I have nothing else to do anyway."

.*+*+*.

Roxas experienced the same treatment with his last class as well. Glares and awkward silences while walking into the room. The whole day was nerve wracking.

Just his first day and things were already a mess.

What exactly was wrong with Axel? It can't be that bad if he has so many friends…

Roxas remembered the mumbling he heard in the café. They said it was dangerous, but Axel didn't seem like that bad of a guy. Not to Roxas or to any of the friends he's made, besides Riku.

He sighed and tugged his hood over his head, preparing for the walk home.

Roxas groaned at the bitter snow sticking to his shoes and face.

_I just want to go home._

.*+*+*.

"Roxas!" Sora swung the door open before he had a chance to pull his key out. "Welcome home!"

Sora grabbed his wrist and tugged him into the warmth of their new home. It seemed everyone had a knack for dragging him everywhere. Even miles away from home.

"Thanks," he let his bag fall to the doorway and kicked off his shoes before peeling his snow covered hoodie.

"How was your first day? Come on, sit. I made some cocoa." Sora grinned while handing over the heated cup.

His eyes practically lulled shut as he took no time to gulp down the scalding chocolate. He sighed a warm breath before sliding his cup away and laying his head to the kitchen table.

"My day was terrible…" he groaned.

"What happened?"

Roxas explained about how everyone was talking about only this one kid, Axel. He explained how everyone had acted strange to him; threatening him with smiles on their faces.

"People are strange,"

"No Sora, don't do it."

"When you're a stranger!"

Roxas groaned and picked himself up to leave the singing brunette in the kitchen.

"You're strange." He mumbled before sinking into his neglected bed. He could still faintly hear his over hyped cousin wailing in the other room.

.*+*+*.

_Mom?_

"_I looked back and saw nothing but black. I couldn't breathe. I felt boxed up."_

_Stay here, Roxas._

"_She shut the door behind her,"_

_Mom the house is burning!_

"_I was slapping the window and I begged her to come back."_

_Mom help it burns!_

"_Dad only pulled her away and…_

_She didn't come back."_

.*+*+*.

Roxas shot out of bed, falling out and onto the floor with a loud thud.

"Dammit," he picked himself up slowly.

He glanced at the still uncovered window to see that it was dark.

He picked his glasses from the floor and repositioned them back onto his face before looking at the clock.

Midnight.

He patted his pockets but remembered his phone was in his bag.

He made his way into the livingroom, his bare feet felt bruised when stepping onto the cold carpet.

His bag still laid by the doorway. He fumbled through it until he found his phone.

4 new text messages.

3 messages were from the same number, 1 was from a different number – but neither numbers were familiar. He began to check them, turning around to lean on the couch.

His gaze locked with sapphires.

Those eyes belonged to a shirtless teacher.

In his home.

With his uncle.

Roxas stared in slight disbelief and confusion at the entangled men on their sofa.

"You're dreaming."

Roxas nodded before mindlessly waddling back to his room.

He was too tired to be surprised or care for that matter.

Turning his attention now to the bright phone screen, he sat back on his bed after shutting his bedroom door. He could hear them awkwardly picking up after themselves in the other room and couldn't help but to let an awkward smile spread across his face.

First message.

_is demyx, text me_

Okay.

Second message.

_Hey. It's Axel._

Figured.

Third message.

_Don't tell me Demyx didn't ask you first._

Fourth message.

_Fuck, forget it. I'm sorry. I thought you agreed to this._

Roxas wrinkled his brows before texting back.

_I fell asleep sry, its ok I told him to give it to u_

He began to put his phone down but jumped in surprise when he almost immediately got a reply.

_Thank god, I thought you hated me._

_Y would I hate u?_

Again, it only took seconds.

_I want to talk to you about that actually._

_Then lets talk_

_In person. Are you free Wednesday? It's my day off._

He hesitated.

_Yea_

_My place? I'll tell you everything you want to know._

_ok_

_Wednesday it is then._

Roxas sat his phone back down and sighed through his nose, this time removing his glasses and replacing his school clothes with something more comfortable before slumping into his bed.

_What is it with these people?_

It was his weekend now, though. He could be away from those people for a while.

He could explore the town with Sora tomorrow.


	3. Snake Eyes

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 3: Snake Eyes

* * *

"Hey," Roxas's world shook. He groaned and rolled over.

"Roxas."

He shot up at the unfamiliar voice.

It was Zack.

He remembered last night; he saw Cloud and Zack together. He peered at the man hovering him.

"What?" he inched back a few.

"Um, hey. Can I ask you something?"

Roxas nodded cautiously.

"Don't tell my wife, okay?"

Roxas nodded again, slowly.

"Thanks."

And he made his way out of Roxas's bedroom.

_This place is getting too weird for me._

Roxas shed himself out of the sheets and searched his nightstand for his glasses.

10:23.

Not too bad for a Saturday.

Still half asleep, he waddled around the home, making his daily routine; bathroom, teeth, shower and then dress.

Sora was already awake, to his luck. He was a pain in the neck to wake up otherwise.

"Hey, Roxas," he patted the stool next to his at the kitchen bar.

Roxas took a seat and Cloud placed a full plate of food down for him. Pancakes, eggs and sausage.

"What's got you cooking, Cloud?" Sora interrogated him with a full mouth but his questions were only answered with silence. His uncle gave Roxas 'the look' before finishing up breakfast and returning to his bedroom.

"What's his problem?"

Roxas turned his head so his cousin couldn't see the smirk across his face. He indeed knew a great deal of information that Sora didn't know, but he'd never turn against his uncle, no matter how hilarious it was.

"What do you want to do today?" Roxas stifled his laughter by shoveling down a pancake.

The brunette groaned and spun in his stool. "Hmm." He turned to face his food again, took a bite, and spun again. Roxas wondered where he got this energy.

"How about we find our way downtown?"

"I don't think they have a downtown." Destiny Islands was practically a village with a few markets and a school for all ages. There was hardly much to do here.

"Yeah." Sora sighed and lowered his head. "It's not the same as Twilight Town."

Roxas nodded, "I miss the clock tower the most."

Sora shook his head violently, "I hate that clock tower!"

"You hate anything that risks you falling." The blond rolled his eyes before sliding from his stool and carrying their now empty plates to the sink.

"Well excuse me I don't want to die in the most painful way possible."

Roxas scoffed, heading to the door to equip his scarf, seeing as how he wore only a sweater and jeans today. He slipped on his oxfords and waited for Sora to dress himself.

Sora's style was vibrant and silly, completely opposite from Roxas.

He dressed in bright sweaters and hoodies, mostly red and blue – his favorite colors. Along with baggy shorts, no matter how cold it got, and sneakers.

Roxas preferred a more "intelligent" look - at least, that's what he would tell you. Dark knitted sweaters with dark denim jeans, complete with his leather oxfords and usually a scarf with an occasional jacket. Since it was just as cold in Twilight Town as it was here, they were lucky they didn't have to completely swap their wardrobe.

"We need to get you some contacts today." Sora threw in before they shut the door behind them. The air was as chilled as ever.

Roxas didn't want to agree, but snow stuck too easily to his glasses and it was hard to see most of the time. "Yeah."

"What color?"

"Hm," Roxas pondered as they walked down the narrow sidewalk. He couldn't help but to remember Axel's narrow green eyes. Maybe if he got some green contacts he could stare into everyone's soul like he does. Internally, he laughed at himself. There's no way he'd be able to pull that off.

"Blue," Roxas looked to his cousin, "let's just stick with blue."

Sora groaned, "You're boring."

.*+*+*.

After only 20 minutes or so of walking they had stumbled across a small parcel of shops and markets. Most were surprisingly updated with 20th century things, regardless of how vintage they looked. Roxas bought a pair of blue contacts, a little too silver for his taste but he wasn't picky.

They were about to leave until they heard a voice calling out for Roxas.

"Riku? What are you doing here?"

He was dressed with a green apron with a white dress shirt underneath, sleeves rolled up and his long silver hair was pulled back into a pony tail.

"I work at that meat market," he pointed to a shop on the corner that didn't really have a sign or a displayed name.

"I'll remember to go to the nameless shop if I need you." Roxas grinned, hoping Riku could catch on to sarcasm.

Luckily he did, at least Roxas thought he did.

"It's just old. The name doesn't really matter."

Sora eventually broke in with a pout. "Why aren't you going to introduce us?" he poked out his bottom lip.

Riku laughed and extended his hand to which the brunette took in his. "I'm Riku. Your brother goes to my school."

"I'm Sora," he grinned, "and Roxas is my cousin."

"Oh. You two live together?"

The two boys nodded.

"Where are your parents?"

Sora shot a worried glance to the blond, but Roxas swallowed his sorrow and played it off cool.

"They're just gone, to vacation. It's a long story."

The silver headed boy nodded.

"So what about you?" he averted his attention to Sora.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you just moved here, too. Do you live with your parents?"

"I live with my dad. My mom died a long time ago."

"Oh," Riku furrowed his brows, "I'm sorry."

Sora shook his head. "It's alright."

"Hey," Roxas looked over the taller boy to see Namine in the market window behind him. Remembering what Riku said about them, he tried to pry away without throwing up red flags. "I'm gonna go check out that shop, are you two going to be okay?"

Sora and Riku nodded, "I have to get back to work, but you can come in with me if you want."

"Sure."

Sora followed behind the tallest and waved to Roxas. "I'll meet you back at home – or here, if we meet up before then."

"Okay." He offered a smile before turning into the small shop. It looked like an instrument shop. Guitars, violins and other instruments were hanging on display everywhere.

"Namine!" he smiled to the short blond, she was dressed in a long black dress with her hair into a bun.

She smiled before giving him a soft embrace, "Hey, Roxas, what're you doing here? Do you play an instrument?"

Her eyes shined in a way that made Roxas want to lie just to keep that look on her face, but he shook his head.

"No, I take it you to though?"

She looked slightly disappointed but kept a smile.

"Yeah," she nodded, a few strands of her falling into her face, "I play the keyboard, and-" she huffed deeply as she looked beside her. "Axel plays the cello; he was just here a minute ago."

She peeked over the tall displays and scanned the store.

"I'm always losing him."

Roxas was slightly relieved for that.

He took the opportunity to hurry out before he got back.

"Well, you'll have to play for me sometime."

She was already deep into her search, frantically bouncing around the rather large shop. It looked smaller from the outside.

She nodded, glancing at Roxas, "Yeah, I will. I'm sorry –" she rushed a smile, "I have to find Axel. He's my ride home."

Roxas only nodded before hurrying out of the store. He finally exhaled deeply, letting out the breath he had held for a little too long. The last thing he needed was those lime eyes glaring him down again.

He pulled his phone out as he started heading towards the road he came from.

_i'm headin home see u there_

Sora was probably caught up making his first new friend here anyway.

He made it halfway home before his phone finally vibrated.

It was Axel.

_Hey, you trying to avoid me?_

His heart skipped a beat and tightened.

_no i just got to get home sry i'll see u monday tho_

Roxas shoved his phone back into his pocket before he had time to reply and quickened his pace home. He rolled his eyes at the immediate reply but refused to look. He needed to get home. That wasn't entirely a lie.

.*+*+*.

"Olette!" he practically yelled into the phone.

_Hey, Roxas. How are you?_

"I'm great. I'm glad you called. I miss you guys."

Roxas heard a bit of fumbling coming from the phone and two other voices wailing his name.

_We miss you, come hooooome!__  
__Roxas! Get your ass home now!_

_Everyone says they miss you too._

Roxas grinned like an idiot and covered his face to muffle his giggles.

"I'm going to visit soon, I promise."

_We're all holding you to that._

"I wouldn't break a promise!"

_I didn't say you would!_

He could practically see her throwing her hands up and smiling.

His phone beeped abruptly in his ear.

"Dammit," he pulled it away to check what it was. "Sora's calling me. Let me call you back later, okay?"

_Promise?_

"I promise."

_Okay, Roxas. We love you! Take care and tell Sora we miss him, too._

"Will do. I love you guys, too."

_Bye, Roxas._

He ended the call and switched lines.

"What's up?"

_Roxas, will you pack me a bag?_

"For what?" he rose to his feet lazily.

_I'm staying at Riku's place. Turns out that he has the Lord of the Rings trilogy and-_

"Say no more." Roxas rolled his eyes and started throwing Sora's clothes into a duffle bag.

_Thanks. Put it on the front porch and I'll be there to get it._

"Yeah, yeah."

_Thanks, later!_

He ended the call and finished packing the bag tightly before placing it on the porch. It was already getting dark out and Cloud wasn't home. Probably with Zack, though.

Roxas sighed before turning into the empty house. It was lonely, that's for sure.

.*+*+*.

Roxas spent the entire weekend practically sleeping. He considered calling his friends again but he was too tired to bother with anyone right now. Sora finally came home Sunday night and cooed over Riku all of Monday morning.

He looked up in the mirror before finally heading out of the door.

Blinking the irritated wetness in his eyes, he placed his contacts in carefully. His eyes looked a little more sapphire now than they did a navy blue. It looked weird, even Sora admitted.

_Oh well._

He started his second walk to school. It wasn't so agonizing now that he knew exactly how to get there and didn't have to worry about first impressions anymore.

First period, art.

He sat next to Xion and watched as the others slowly appeared in class.

Namine was in the same outfit she was in on Saturday, and Axel wore a dress shirt and pants with his hair pulled back.

"Hey, Roxas!" she hurried over to sit next to the blond and immediately pushed her face into his. "Woah, weren't your eyes a different color?"

He awkwardly chuckled and backed up a few. "Yeah, I had to get contacts."

"Ooh, cool." She offered a smile before turning to her sister. "Why aren't you performing?"

She only shrugged and fumbled her thumbs on the desk. Namine smiled sadly, "Fine, fine." She returned her attention to Roxas. "Are you going to go to the talent show?"

He nodded, "I take it you're performing?"

"Mhm! I'm playing keyboard and Axel is helping me out by playing the cello, so we're a duet." She turned to Axel and sarcastically gasped, "And look – here he is for once."

A smile spread across his face; the first smile Roxas had ever seen coming from the red head.

_He looks… gorgeous._

He broke gazes when Axel's eyes finally connected with his. "I'll be there." He looked to Namine for some relief.

"Good. It's going to be in the café, next period." She pulled a small digital camera from her small purse, "Would you mind?"

Roxas shook his head and took the camera, "Not at all."

"Thanks!"

"Okay class," the short teacher lazily stomped in, obviously hating her job. "Time to get to work."

.*+*+*.

Roxas had let his eyes get sidetracked to Axel far enough today. He wasn't sure if he could hold his hands steady with recording him now.

He leaned against the back wall of the café. All the tables had been pressed against the wall and replaced with numerous chairs. There weren't many people in the audience, but it was still crowded. 50 people at least. The stage that was usually curtained had been revealed and candles were lit around the edge. It looked elegant. At least from Roxas's point of view.

He positioned the camera and prepared himself for when the two came out.

"Hey, do you want a camera stand?" Aqua appeared from nowhere but Roxas was thankful for it. "I always carry the camera stands during events. I usually make people rent them, but I'll let you borrow one free of charge." She pulled a folded one from a small bag and helped him stretch it out.

"Thanks," he smiled bashfully and she returned it.

"Don't mention it. I gotta go though, lots to do!"

He nodded before she jogged off.

Placing the small camera on the stand, he repositioned it again to focus on the stage.

.*+*+*.

No one else really bothered him the rest of the event. Demyx embarrassed himself by cutting his fingers on his guitar and had to end his show early. The rest of the kids were unfamiliar faces to him and he figured his other friends were probably sitting in the crowd. He was the only one standing so far away from the stage.

Namine and Axel had finally appeared on stage, a large keyboard was straddled between her crossed arms and it almost looked taller than her.

Axel walked behind her with a white, glossy cello in one hand, and a black bow in his other.

Roxas quickly turned on the camera and began recording hands free. He leaned against the wall again and watched the duo nervously setting up.

Axel looks human. Then why is everyone so cruel to him?

Roxas sighed tenderly at the peaceful look on the red heads face. He didn't understand this school one bit.

Once Axel had seated, he looked to the standing blond who nodded and they began playing. A soft, hypnotic duet. It really was an elegant sight. He smiled a relaxed smile and closed his eyes, absorbing the quiet melody.

He opened his eyes slowly, his face flushed immediately. He could feel his piecing gaze locked on him. He tried his best to avoid eye contact, nervously watching Namine.

When he finally looked, the red head had a faint smirk spread across his face as he broke their gaze, returning it to his instrument.

His fingers moved swiftly around the long neck and his other hand swayed effortlessly. He almost felt guilty that he couldn't avert all his attention to Namine.

After 15 minute of tension, a sigh of relief finally exhaled his swollen lungs as he switched the camera to stop recording.

He smiled towards the stage in hopes that the two could see.

He removed the camera from the stand and folded it back up before turning the camera off. It didn't take long before the short blond came dancing up to him.

"Did you get it?" she poked out her bottom lip as she awaited her answer.

Roxas chuckled and handed the camera over. "Every bit."

"Good, my dad will be happy to see." Her grin beamed, even in the darkest part of the room. Axel appeared behind her not much longer.

"Thanks for recording it for us."

Roxas only nodded and faked a smile.

His eyes were still as piercing as ever, just like Namine's smile in the dark. They still had a shine to them.

He removed the band from his hair. Roxas could only see his silhouette, but the figure was still gorgeous as ever. His long red hair laid loosely against his shoulders.

Axel barked a quiet laugh, "Don't get used to it."

Roxas snapped out of his trance to find he was staring. His face heated, "Sorry."

Axel shook his head. "So do you two want to go get something to eat?"

Namine groaned and nodded.

"You're buying, right?"

Axel smiled again and nodded.

Roxas's heart thumped in his ears. His hair was down, and he was smiling that smile.

"Roxas!" fingers were snapping in his face again.

"How come every time I ask you if you want to go eat you space out?"

Roxas shrugged, "Sorry, I think I'm just tired."

Axel nodded, "So do you want to go out with us?"

He hesitated for a moment before nodding.

.*+*+*.

Roxas had been prepared to walk across the street again, but found himself piling into Axel's car with the two. Apparently there was a restaurant just out of town that Axel had wanted to visit for a while. If Roxas would have known it was going to be a fancy restaurant he would have refused the offer. But he was stuck here now, at a dinner table, with a menu in hand.

He decided to keep it simple and ordered a small steak dinner. Axel tried to convince him to get more but he refused. The other two got the same thing, a grilled salmon dinner with salads. He felt so out of place here.

They finished their meals surprisingly quickly. Axel stopped him when he tried to get ready to go. "There's one last thing I want to get." He shot Namine a sinister glare and she bashfully looked away. Roxas began to wonder if they were actually a couple, suddenly feeling like a third wheel.

Axel mumbled his last order to a nearby waiter, and they brought over a small dish between the two boys.

"I wanted you to try something with me." He pulled the lid off to reveal a plump yellow fruit in the shape of a star.

Roxas looked up to Namine with confusion. She stammered a bit, "I'm, um, allergic to it." She waved her hands before burying her attention to her cellphone.

Axel pulled a thin knife out from his napkin before slicing off one of the edges of the star and handing it to Roxas. He repeated the cut on another edge and waited for Roxas to take a bite.

Roxas nibbled at the edge of the strange fruit. It was sour but sweet. He finally took a small bite from the small piece.

Axel mimicked him before smirking devilishly.

Roxas swallowed mindlessly before glancing to Namine who was straining to stifle her smile.

"What did you guys do?"

She extended her phone to Roxas. He took it with confusion.

A small pile of text sat on her phone, a picture of that fruit they had just eaten.

_Paopu Fruit__  
__A star-shaped fruit native to Destiny Islands.__  
__According to legend, "If two people share one, their destinies become intertwined. They'll remain a part of each other's lives no matter what"._

Roxas's face immediately flushed and his eyes slowly widened. He sheepishly handed Namine her phone back before averting his gaze to his feet.

He could still feel the smirk on Axel's face.


	4. Cello Strings

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 4: Cello Strings

* * *

_Expectation is a form of torture, Roxas and yet we never stop._

"Roxas! Get up and get ready for school!"

Roxas groaned before rolling out of bed and getting ready. He was quick about it, really. He was anxious to finish the day. Today was the day Axel finally told him the truth.

He wasn't at school Tuesday. Neither was Namine or Demyx. It's been lonely without them. Especially since Sora was spending more of his time with Riku now.

After the dinner with Axel he was nervous to hell and back to face him again, so he was kind of glad he wasn't at school. It was nice, though. Roxas wouldn't have dared to express the happiness he felt at Axel's gesture.

He smiled past his frostbitten skin. He had his conclusion. Axel wasn't a bad guy.

.*+*+*.

When he got to the school Axel was waiting at the front gate, leaning against his car. His hair was spiked again and his glare was back.

Roxas hesitated but finally walked to him.

"Oh, hey." Axel barely smiled at him. "You ready?"

Roxas blinked and looked to his school, "We're skipping?"

Axel shrugged. "You don't have to come."

Roxas stared at the entrance but he already knew what he was going to do. He sighed and walked to the other side of the car, waiting for Axel to unlock it.

He smirked. "Already unlocked." He winked at Roxas before opening his own door and sliding in.

Roxas's face flushed again as he slid slowly into the seat and placed his bag on the floorboard.

.*+*+*.

The drive there was short but painfully quiet. Roxas didn't know what to say and he was guessing that Axel didn't either.

They finally made it to a large lot surrounded by apartments. It was a neat and organized place. The buildings were white stone and the doors were painted a dark maroon. Flower beds were in the middle of the parking lot and beside the floor apartments. It seemed relaxing, especially considering it was quiet.

"Apartment 13," Axel motioned for Roxas to follow him up some stairs, "Just in case you ever need to know. Got it memorized?" Axel raised his brow and tapped his temple before pulling his keys out and unlocking the door.

Axel walked in and stepped out of the way after pulling his keys out and setting them down on the counter. Roxas stepped in slowly and shut the door behind him. The red head sighed before turning to Roxas.

"First thing you should know," he broke eye contact, "I've got a bad attitude." He led Roxas further into the apartment. "I don't mean to, it's just natural."

Roxas nodded and observed the small apartment. Red walls and white carpets. The kitchen was connected to the livingroom and there was a small hallway that Roxas guessed led to the bedroom and bathroom. "It's fine, Axel."

Axel nodded "I'm sorry, though. I can be mean and cold. I don't mean it though." He sighed through his nose again and made his way to the kitchen.

He leaned against the counter and watched Roxas.

"Another thing you should know…" he mumbled and broke eye contact again. "I'm gay." He twisted his face and observed Roxas's bland reaction. He only shrugged.

"You seemed like it."

Axel's face flushed but he smiled nervously. "Glad you're okay with it."

"So what about-"

"All the rumors…" Axel cut him off, "I'll get to that. Do you want something to drink?"

Roxas nodded and carefully took a seat on the leather sofa. It was a classy get up. His cello leaned against one of the corners of the livingroom, a small screen tv sat in the middle of the room with a couch and two recliners circling it. It was nice.

His phone vibrated in his pocket and he immediately pulled it out.

It was Hayner.

_That's right, I asked him to research Axel._

Roxas's stomach twisted.

This is a bad time.

He quickly ended the call and texted his friend.

_cant talk_

He hid his phone between his legs and watched Axel fixing their drinks. His phone vibrated quickly again.

_rox I looked up this guy_

_ok tell me later_

_are u with him?_

_yea_

Another reply. Quick. Sudden.

He hesitantly glanced at his phone.

_GET OUT OF THERE!_

Roxas's heart pounded in his chest. He tried to reply but Axel was already walking his way. He casually stuffed his phone back between his legs.

Maybe he was looking at the wrong Axel.

But Axel has history, and how many people are named Axel?

His mind wandered frantically and his heart rate increased with every thought.

Namine wouldn't lie to him though.

He just met her though.

Riku told him to stay away.

Someone would have warned him if it was this bad.

His phone was going crazy with vibrations through his legs. Axel sat a cup in front of Roxas on the coffee table and took a seat in a recliner across from him. Luckily.

He lifted his phone carefully again and ended the incoming call.

_HES CRAZY ROX__  
__LET ME KNOW UR OK!_

He quickly turned his phone off and attempted to swallow the knot in his throat.

"Are you okay?"

He quickly shot his frantic glare up to Axel. His words sounded like honey now and it was making Roxas sick. He opened his mouth to speak but his words got caught in the knot.

_Play it cool. You came here for a reason, to get answers._

"I'm fine." His words sounded like babble.

Axel sighed and sat his own cup down. "I guess I should hurry and get this in the open."

Roxas nodded nervously, adjusting in his seat. He glanced at the front door. It was unlocked. He scanned the rest of the room and committed an attack to memory.

"Roxas, I promise you I'm not a monster."

He began to soften at the red head's words but tensed back up immediately.

Don't fall for it.

Something is wrong here.

"My parents were abusive when I was a kid. They beat me and my sister. No one believed us." He slowly set his gaze with Roxas's. "My sister was sick all the time." He averted his gaze again and adjusted with an uncomfortable look on his face. "I don't know why I'm telling you all of this… except I feel like you're different. I'd also rather you hear the full story from me than someone else… you're the only one who doesn't know."

Roxas nodded carefully, somewhat relaxing.

"She was sick, though. My parents wouldn't help her. They…" he rubbed his forehead and sighed. "They sold her off to prostitution and she died and-"

Roxas's heart twisted at Axel's discomfort. He was going through all of this misery just to tell him. Roxas was only stirring up unwanted dust… but something inside him wouldn't stop Axel until the truth was out.

Axel cleared his throat. "They didn't tell me for years. Not until my freshmen year of high school. They told me she had to go to a special hospital and I believed that bullshit for years."

"I got really… pissed off when I found the truth out. I really loved my sister." The red head crossed his arms and stared at the floor with a disgusted look on his face. "I'm going to tell you now; if they were good people I wouldn't be here today. Think about that before you jump to conclusion." He glared coldly at Roxas for a moment but quickly returned his vision to the ground.

He sighed one last painful sigh before leaning his elbows against his knees.

"It was my parents,"

His voice was somber and his eyes were shady. He didn't dare to look up at Roxas as the room fell eerily quiet.

"I killed them." Axel finally mumbled, so quiet that Roxas thought he was hearing things.

"I found my dad's axe and butchered them and I turned myself in immediately after it. I had to transfer schools but the news wouldn't leave me alone. Once everyone found out, I had to address it to everyone in public to warn them. I didn't want to kill them, I just…"

Axel bit off the end of his words with a strained choke.

Roxas's discomfort heightened to a whole new level. Axel finally looked up to see Roxas's petrified expression.

"You can go; I'm not going to stop you, if that's what you're afraid of."

Roxas didn't respond.

There was nothing in his head. He tried to process the thought of this boy in front of him covered in blood, chopping his own parents into pieces.

.*+*+*.

He quietly lifted himself up after seconds of silence.

Axel knew this was coming. He slumped back into his seat and closed his eyes before sighing through his nose.

He flinched as something heavy fell into his lap. His usually narrow eyes widened and stared in disbelief at the frail blond plopped into his lap and wrapped his arms around his neck.

"You're not a monster, Axel." he nuzzled the surprisingly soft hair that was against Axel's neck and whispered quietly against the tender flesh. "I understand."

Axel's eyes glazed over with tears but he held them back with clenched teeth as he wrapped his arms carefully around his new friend.

.*+*+*.

Axel's POV

Axel drove Roxas back to school quietly. They didn't say much on the way there. Axel stayed in the parking lot and called Demyx before driving home. His first call was ended.

The usual routine.

He called back moments later, probably hiding in a bathroom stall.

_I just saw Roxas walk in, did you tell him?_

"_Yeah."_

_How did he react?_

"_He held me."_

_He__held__you?_

"I don't believe it either."

_It is the best reaction you've got._

"I think I love him."

_Don't get carried away, Axel._

"I mean it…"

_You just met the kid._

"And he already treats me better than any other stranger."

_I dunno, be careful, Ax. I need to get back to class. I'll see you tonight._

.*+*+*.

Roxas's POV

It was still first period.

Roxas walked in and almost as immediately as he did Demyx excused himself to go to the bathroom.

He sat next to Namine and Xion, as usual. Still petrified though.

"Roxas are you okay?"

"You look like you just saw a hundred ghosts." Xion gently shook Roxas.

He furrowed his brows before looking up to Namine.

"Axel…" the two girls showed slight discomfort. Aqua even glanced up from her book.

"He told me."

All three girls quickly jumped closer, "What did you say? Are you okay?"

"What did he say exactly?"

Roxas's tone grew a bitter, "Nothing that you don't already know." He lowered his eyes and softened his voice ashamed. "I never would have guessed."

The group fell quiet before Demyx walked back in and took his seat. He glanced at Roxas in a way that made him guess he already knew what Roxas knew.

"Do you hate him?" Aqua's voice was monotone. Everyone was probably thinking the same question. "Are you afraid of him?"

All their eyes were on Roxas.

He softly shook his head and held a confused look on his face. "I don't know why, but…" he strained to say how he really felt.

"I think I _love_ him."

"Pity love, brotherly love, or…?" Namine questioned him curiously.

Roxas let a faint smile tug at his lips.

"I guess we'll find out."


	5. Everlasting

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 5: Everlasting

* * *

"Roxas," he hadn't answered his texts for days. Axel was getting too nervous to go to school. It was Wednesday of next week now and if Axel didn't hear his voice soon he was going to go crazy. But for the fourth time, he left another voice message. "If you're okay, please let me know. After what I told you… I'm scared, Rox. I don't want you to be afraid of me. I-"

_Inbox is full, goodbye._

Axel ended the call, slamming his phone on the coffee table and cursing under his breath.

This was nerve wracking. He seemed so sincere when he held Axel; was it just for show?

With desperation he called Namine, for the first time in a week. He didn't want anyone to see him like this. Whiskey bottles stacked one another beside his bed, cigarette smoke polluted the tightly packed air. Everything was rushing back, and right now Axel only wanted Roxas. He wanted that sincere and understanding gentleness back.

"Namine?"

_Axel? Where have you been?! Why didn't you return my calls?!_

"I'm sorry. Have you seen Roxas at school lately?"

_Yeah, of course. Why?_

"He hasn't talked to me in a week. I'm worried…"

_Axel._

Namine let out a quiet giggle.

_He told us he loved you. He thinks he does anyway. You need to go see him. This is a lot for him to take in. Remember when you had to tell Aqua and Riku?_

Axel's stomach turned at the memory.

"Yeah." He sighed before rubbing his forehead. "I don't know where he lives."

Axel's eyes grew wide. "Wait, back up! What did you say?"

He could already see the smirk on Namine's face.

_He said he loves you._ She cooed.

"I doubt that."

Namine remained hesitantly quiet on the receiver for a moment, fearing she had already said too much.

She changed the subject back to the original topic. _Why don't you look up his number?_

Axel scoffed. "That's fucking creepy."

_Yeah, well._ She sighed. _Do you want to talk to him or not?_

Axel rubbed his forehead with frustration again before exhaling deeply.

"I'll call you back."

_Okay. Be careful, Axel._

"You too."

He hung up and dialed Demyx's number.

_Ax, yo._

"Dem, I need you to look up Roxas's address for me."

_845 Luna Drive._

Axel stammered, "How did you look it up that fast?"

_I didn't. I saw him writing it down. It's not that hard to memorize._

"Tch." A small flame of jealousy shot through Axel. "Well, thanks."

_Don't mention it. Talk to you later._

Axel jotted the address down on a nearby envelope before hanging up his phone. This was risky; just showing up at his house like this. Was it even worth it?

He tried to remember the tender embrace they shared. No one has ever held him like that. Not even Xion when they were a thing. His former boyfriends, either. No one. Roxas was the first one not to fear him after hearing the news.

_Fuck, just rip my heart out and feed it to me, kid. It might hurt less._

.*+*+*.

Roxas's POV

"Roxas, you have company!"

He snapped out of his daze and rolled over to check the time.

6:32. He glanced outside.

Must be PM. The sun was setting.

But who could possibly be visiting him now?

A small tap at his door attracted his full attention.

"It's open!"

The red head poked his head through the door with a sad smile and Roxas's heart started thumping again. He hurriedly ripped the blankets over his exposed body. He was only in a beater and boxers. Axel averted his eyes quickly, surprisingly.

His face radiated, "I-I'm sorry, I thought you were going to be family."

Axel only chuckled and shook his head. "It's alright." He shut the door nervously behind him and leaned against the closed door.

"What are you doing here?" Roxas eased a bit, putting his arms over the blanket covering his bare crossed legs.

The red head's face almost matched his hair tone. "You weren't answering my calls or texts… I got really worried."

It was time for Roxas to blush. Embarrassment and a bit of shame sunk into his heart. "I didn't know what to say…" He looked at his hands sadly.

Axel only nodded. "I figured."

Roxas bit his lip before looking back up at the lanky figure. "I actually…" he rubbed the back of his neck and broke their gaze. "I was wondering if I could ask some… things."

He scoot near the head of the bed and patted the other end for Axel to sit, to which he did. He sat with his legs stretched and his back to the wall but faced Roxas.

"What do you want to know?"

Roxas figured it would be best to start with the little questions.

"How old are you?"

"19."

"Oh." Roxas nodded, and removed his glasses. Maybe if he could blur that glare it wouldn't make him cower so badly in his own room. "When's your birthday?"

"August 12th."

Roxas frowned. "I missed it, then."

"Only by two months." He laughed featherly.

"And 15 days." Roxas threw in with a nervous laugh. Axel nodded and looked softly at the blond.

Roxas pondered his mind. "What's your favorite color?"

"Hm," Axel stared off at the other side of the room. Boxes were still stacked all over the room, besides one dressed filled with only a few sweaters, jeans, socks and boxers. A tall mirror leaned against one wall and a few posters were scattered across one side of the room, some hanging. "Blue."

"Then why is your hair red?"

Axel scoffed sarcastically. "It's natural."

Roxas rolled his eyes. "Suuure."

He slipped his glasses back on, frustrated that he couldn't see his expressions now. He looked back up, blinking his eyes into vision a few times. He caught the green eyes into his gaze quickly. Axel's hair was still sprawled over his shoulders and he looked tired. Black bags were forming under his eyes and his lips were paler than usual. Still, he looked stunning.

"Why did you get those tattoos?" Roxas broke his concentration on Axel's features and pointed under his own eyes.

Axel only shrugged. "It takes the attention away from this." He circled his open hand over his face. "The ugly." He smiled a painfully obvious fake smile.

"You're not ugly." Roxas tilted his head and wrinkled his brows.

He kept the fake smile on, leaning his head against the wall and looking straight forward. "If you say so."

"Are you self-conscious?"

He shrugged again. "I guess you could call it that."

Roxas's heart tightened. "You shouldn't be." A knot twisted in his throat again. He watched Axel shrug again.

"You're really…" he looked down at his hands and played his thumbs in circles around one another. He pondered for the right word, and courage. Only one word came to his mind. The same word he used to describe him that one night. "Gorgeous."

Axel's face flushed as soon as the word slipped from his mouth and the room fell quiet again. He kept his glare to the other side of the room.

Roxas internally groaned.

_Say something._

Axel quickly shot his glare to Roxas before crawling closer to him until he was practically on top of him. Roxas's heart raced. He could feel nothing but heat radiating off of Axel and looking past his lenses, he could see that there was some kind of flame dancing in those green eyes. He sunk his head closer to Roxas's; his breath ghosted on the small boy's cheek and sent chills through every skin cell. His breathing turned into shallow gasps, fearing his first kiss might be taken from him right now and he had no willpower to shove him off.

He opened his mouth to speak but his breath hitched as he felt the warm lips against his cheek. He exhaled a deep breath and tried to relax his trembling body. He shuddered at the warm breathing against his lobe and the heated lips pressed barely underneath his eye.

He leaned higher against his elbows as the red head pulled away and repositioned himself where he sat before.

Roxas was still a mess, lying down awkwardly with the same stunned expression on his face.

"Anymore questions?" Axel stared blankly at Roxas, as if nothing had just happened.

"Why did you do that?" Roxas carefully pushed himself to sit up right.

Axel smiled sweetly. "Because you're nice."

Roxas nodded slowly.

_A thank you would have been just the same._

He brushed it off, not wanting to humor this anymore.

"So what's your favorite band?"

Axel raised a brow at the sudden change of subject.

"Johnny Hollow, I think."

Roxas looked confused. "Never heard of them."

"Of course you haven't. They're probably not your style." He smirked.

"Since when do you know my style?" Roxas crossed his arms and pouted.

"Since I saw that Celldweller poster over there." He glanced to a poster hanging on the wall. Roxas only rolled his eyes.

"He's a lot of genres, though." Roxas defended his argument.

Axel shrugged. "Just sayin'. You probably wouldn't be into them."

"Why don't we see?"

"You'd have to come back to my place."

"Fine, let's go." Roxas stood, forgetting he was still half naked but still provoking his new friend.

Axel smiled at the blush that flushed Roxas's face when he realized how exposed he was.

"I have to work tomorrow." He frowned again.

"Oh." Roxas retreated back to the bed with slight disappointment, but slight relief that his common sense was returning as he realized how bad of an idea it might be.

"But, I can call in. If – you spend the night with me." A smirk split across his face again.

"No way!" Roxas's eyes widened.

"Why not? I won't try anything."

"That's not the point! I barely know you."

"Good, then we can get to know each other."

Roxas growled in frustration. There was no point in arguing with this guy.

With a sigh, Roxas agreed.

Axel smiled a genuine smile before rising. "Alright, pack a bag and meet me out by my car."

He watched the lanky boy leave his room and waited for him to close the door before bolting up to lock it. He rummaged quickly through his clothes and changed into something more decent.

A grey loosely fit sweater with bleached and pale jeans and his usual oxfords. He sighed at his failed decency. He turned his book bag over and emptied the contents before refilling it quickly with random clothes from his dresser.

Axel's POV / 1P

I inhaled deeply and let the chilled air fill my lungs. So much better than cigarette smoke. Exhaling just as deeply, I leaned against my car and waited for Roxas.

These past two weeks have been the most tense of my life. I don't know what it is about this kid. Something inside me just wants to chain him up and never let him leave me again – but that's what makes me the scary bastard that I am today. The things I say and do.

I could never hurt a person. Especially not the one who opened his arms welcomely to me.

I glanced at my watch as I saw the blond jogging from his doorway and struggling to throw his scarf over his shoulder.

"Sorry!" he slung a bag over his shoulder, "My uncle held me up."

I might need help being held up too.

_Shake it off._

"It's fine." I opened the door for him and waited for him to get inside before I did the same and switched on the heater. He took off the pointless scarf and searched for a place to lay it. I took a hold of it and tossed it in the backseat before pulling into reverse and backing out of his driveway.

"I want you to meet someone when we get there." I kept my eyes on the road but directed my smirk to him.

"Who?"

He looked nervous. How cute.

"His name is Roccia."

Roxas's POV

Roxas shuddered at the way that rolled off of Axel's tongue.

As curious as he was about Roccia, another subject teased his mind.

"What's that accent?"

Axel smirked as usual. "Italian. Nice of you to notice."

"You're Italian?"

He nodded, "Infattie."

Roxas furrowed his brows with confusion when Axel glanced over.

He sighed. "Yes." He bluntly said with a playfully monotone look on his face.

"So who is Roe-see-ya?"

Axel chuckled at the attempted pronunciation and corrected him with a smile. "Roccia is my cat."

Roxas pouted. "I don't like cats."

"What? How could you not like cats?"

He shrugged. "They're mean."

"Not Roccia, he's too cute and cuddly."

"That's what they want you to think." Roxas playfully narrowed his eyes before slapping his hand to his face.

Axel raised a confused brow. "Um," he glanced over to the blond who looked petrified, "everything… okay?"

"I forgot my contacts!"

"Do you want me to turn around?"

He hesitated before shaking his head. "Forget it."

"You sure? I don't want you over there slap boxing yourself over contacts."

Roxas rolled his eyes and rubbed his face where he had slapped. "I'm okay."

Axel hesitantly nodded and glanced at the blond one last time before locking his eyes to the road.

.*+*+*.

The drive was a little longer from Roxas's house instead of the school, but only by 5 minutes at most.

Once the two had gotten from the car Axel immediately grabbed Roxas's wrist and hurried them to the door with chattering teeth.

"I think there's a snow storm coming." He fumbled with his keys once they made it to his door.

"Then get us inside." Roxas hugged himself and huddled closely against the radiating heat from the red head.

"I'm trying." He eagerly searched through his many keys trying to find the correct one.

When he did he shoved it in quickly and ripped the door open before yanking Roxas in and slamming it shut. He fell against the closed door and sighed deeply at the warmth of his home.

"I'm so glad I left the heater on." His eyes rolled back before he stripped himself of his heavy jacket. Roxas did the same, walking through the already known hallway and laying his layered jackets on the sofa. Axel soon did the same, now wearing a loose fit black sweater.

It was adorable, and without thinking Roxas snatched a hold of one of Axel's hands.

He held their palms together and observed the boney fingers. Half of his hand was covered with the long sleeve, which Roxas thought was absolutely cute. His fingernails were clean and stubby and his skin was pale but porcelain like. He wondered what his fingers would feel like between his.

His thoughts snapped away as he made the mistake of finally looked up at the strange expression on Axel's face and dropped his hand with blush covered cheeks.  
"Sorry." He looked down quickly.

"It's okay." Axel observed Roxas before slowly turning around and making his way into the kitchen, pulling two Dr. Peppers from the fridge.

"I don't have coffee and cocoa and all that shit," he said with a sarcastic expression as he popped the two cans open, "so I hope you like Dr. P." He handed one of the cans to Roxas.

Roxas nodded and watched Axel taking a seat on the same recliner as last time. He took the same seat in the small loveseat. "It's my favorite soda."

"That's one thing we have in common." Axel smiled before taking a few gulps.

Roxas sipped at the bubbly liquid oozing from the top of the can.

"Ah," Axel shot out of his chair and sat his can down on the coffee table between the two boys. "Hold on." He walked into the narrow hallway and turned into the room on the left.

A grey and white fat feline came trotting out of the room, rubbing against everything it could find in it's path before mewing at two small bowls on the floor.

Axel opened a large pantry beside the fridge and pulled out a small can of wet food and scooped it into the bowl.

"This is Roccia." He finally looked up to Roxas.

Roxas grimaced, "What kind of thing is it?"

Axel glared Roxas down before taking his seat again. "Thing? You mean breed?"

Roxas nodded carelessly.

"He's a Scottish fold."

"Ugly." Roxas spat out before returning the hostile glare.

He suddenly realized who he was talking to. He was actually joking around with a _murderer_. He was _comfortable_ with him.

Roxas tensed up at the thoughts but unreeled once Axel burst into laughter.

"You are just too cute." Axel offered him a smile, "But the cat is cuter than you, so he stays."

He smiled sincerely but weakly. He was in disbelief with himself.

He couldn't resist that smile, though.

Falling in love with a murderer, though?

This had to be what falling in love felt like. Weak, carefree and just wanting to fall desperately into the other's arms, spilling their own heart out.

This is a whole new to him.

He wanted to scream. The tension inside him was building up.

How long could he possibly deny him?

Axel wasn't a murderer.

He stared deeply into those emerald eyes; the ones that were glimmering and watching his helpless cat eating food that he provided. That wasn't something a murderer would do. A murderer couldn't wear that kind of genuine smile.

Axel was a human.

* * *

Author Notes

The only reason I did a 1P for Axel was so you could see how mutual the feelings are.  
I might do 1P's every now and again, sometimes it's the best way for you to see how the character is feeling. c:


	6. Bloodstained

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 6: Bloodstained

* * *

Roxas stepped out of the tight shower and quickly dressed. The bathroom was unbelievably small and it was getting hard to breathe with all of the steam in the room.

He deeply inhaled the crisp fresh air once he finally stepped into the hallway again with his hair still dripping wet. Axel was still sitting in the same spot that he was before but it was more than obvious that he had straightened up the place in his absence.

"I need to go to school tomorrow."

Axel nodded and ran his fingers through his straight hair. "Or you could skip and I could show you around town."

A smile played on Roxas's lips. "I don't know." He cooed in a sing-song, "What's in it for me?"

The red head shrugged and returned the smile. "You won't get lost in this small gutter of a town."

"You and I both know it's impossible to get lost in this town."

Roccia tickled Roxas's feet with his whiskers and mewed underneath their conversation. Axel finally leaned over to call his pet over to which he lifted him up and sat the fat fur ball in his lap.

"Oh," Axel glanced at Roxas who was still standing just beside him. "Did you want to sit here?" Another glance to his lap and a playful stare at Roxas.

Roxas tiredly smiled before slumping back into his usual seat on the couch.

"It's weird, you know." He looked to Axel's smile to keep him confident.

"What's weird?" Their gazes locked; unawkwardly – it was calm. The atmosphere didn't show a trace of hostility.

"I barely know you," Roxas picked his glasses up from the coffee table and slid them carefully on. "But I feel like I've known you for a while."

Axel desperately tried to look past the lenses that glared but it was impossible to. He averted his attention back to his feline with a faint smile.

"Maybe we did know each other."

"Have any yearbooks?"

Axel shook his head and frowned. "I really doubt we knew each other."

"Anything is possible. You lived in Twilight Town, so did I, we were both kids, there was only one school." Roxas locked his fingers together. "Put two and two together." He finished his statement off with an unsure shrug and finally looked away from their long ago broken gaze.

Moments of silence passed before Axel skeptically agreed.

"Want to go to the school tomorrow and see?"

"What? In Twilight Town?"

Axel nodded and desperately tried to look past that glare for his reaction.  
Roxas's eyes widened and he stammered, throwing his hands around in some kind of attempt to speak.

"Do you know how far away that is?"

"6 hours." Axel bluntly stated with a smirk.

The blond's mouth hung ajar with an indescribable expression. "How would we get there?"

"I have a car."

"I have school and you have work."

"I called in." Axel glanced at his cellphone lying on the table and dared him to deny it.

Roxas scoffed and pouted before looking towards the floor. "There's never a point in arguing with you, is there?"

Axel laughed, in a way that was more of a giggle that made his face flush. "I guess not."

The feline finally hopped from Axel's lap and began mewing at the empty food bowl.

Axel sighed tiredly, "I have to go pick up some cat food." He looked back to Roxas before standing up. "Want to wait here or come with me?"

"Should I get dressed?"

Axel scoffed and looked down at himself; he was dressed in the same black sweater but with baggy black sleeping pants and socks. Roxas acknowledged the motion and stood to follow Axel to the door. He quickly swayed out of Axel's way for him to shut and lock the door before they made their way down the dark stairs and into the car.

"What time is it?"

Axel squinted as the small numbers on his dashboard. "Nine o'clock." He resumed his routine, putting the keys in ignition, fumbling with something in the arm rest and then turned the gear into reverse. He placed an arm behind Roxas to back out; to which his nerves immediately awakened at the closeness. He looked over to the barely visible red head.

If only everyone was as understanding as Roxas.

"So," Axel finally pulled out and onto the road, now driving a little over the speed limit of 40. He glanced from the road, back to darkness of the car and repeat until his cellphone light lit up.

"Scroll through there until you find a Johnny Hollow song that sounds interesting to you."

Roxas was resting his chin against his hand against the arm rest and only looked at Axel with a blank expression. "Seriously?"

Axel nodded, keeping his eyes to the road. "That's the whole reason you came over, anyway." He smirked and glanced at the pale outline. His glasses were still the only thing he could see and that aggravated him.

Roxas sighed through his nose, feeling a little intrusive to even touch someone else's phone; but eventually flicked his finger across the screen until he found an interesting song title; "Alchemy". He turned his attention back to the road, along with Axel, and listened to the slow instrumental and soft hums. It was becoming more than obvious that Axel was a classical kind of guy.

"They sound peaceful." Now halfway through the song; it was putting Roxas to sleep and worried that it may do the same to the driver.

Axel smiled, though and nodded. "They can be. Some of their stuff is a bit more eerie."

Roxas agreed as the song began getting more melodic, looking to Axel who was still firmly concentrated on the road. He wondered so many things about him.

A new song came on and Roxas glanced to see it was the same band, but with a much more depressing melody; piano music, a man quietly singing and a familiar stringed instrument that was followed by a female singer.

He wondered if this is what Axel listened to when feeling upset. The simple thought of Axel having emotions tugged at Roxas's heart. What was so different about him that made others call him a monster?

"Why do you call yourself a monster?" he mindlessly asked his thoughts. His chin still rested in his palm and he kept a blank observational stare at the red head.

Axel pursed his lips and adjusted before glancing to meet the blond's stare for a moment before turning back to the road.

He chuckled awkwardly. "When did I do that?"

Roxas pondered his thoughts for an exact moment. "A couple of times you told me not to think that you're a monster. That means you had to think you are."

Axel didn't look at him again. He only shrugged the question off before pulling into a brightly lit supermarket. "This is our stop." He parked in the barely populated parking lot and rummaged through the center arm rest again before slowly making his way out of the car.

Roxas mimicked his exit and met him at the front of the car before following closely behind him. He glanced at the hand resting at Axel's side. Just the thought of touching him sent a large electric shock through his chest that played a faint smile on his face. He wondered if he could ever make Axel fall for him the way Axel was making him fall.

He quietly trotted up a few steps before he wrapped his fingers around the warmer hand. He bashfully looked up to the red head who offered him a smile before closing his hand on Roxas's. His heart raced at the sudden thought that people would see them together; holding hands in the middle of the store at night; and his smile grew wider at that.

"Okay," Axel led him through the front of the large store before stopping at an aisle full of nothing but bags of cat food and cat toys. It was disgusting. "Roccia is picky," Roxas groaned internally as he spoke with a natural tongue again. Damn that cat and damn that irresistible accent. "So he will only eat chicken flavored wet food." Axel looked back with his brow raised, still hand in hand with Roxas.

"Okay." Roxas wasn't sure why he was telling him this.

"So-"

"Roxas!"

Axel's hand tightened as Roxas looked back to his cousin's voice. He waved to Sora, motioning him to come over before looking back to the red head who held an uncomfortable look on his face as he watched the brunette jogging over.

He looked back to Sora who was now followed by Riku. It was Roxas's turn to hold his breath as the two came closer. He had hoped Riku would have stayed away or Axel would have gone back to the car; anything but the two of them clashing in the middle of the store.

"What are you doing here?" Sora peeked over Roxas's shoulder and must have seen their hands because he grinned the stupidest grin. "Is this your boyfriend?"

Roxas stuttered and opened his mouth to talk but was interrupted by Riku's stern voice.

"No, it's not his boyfriend." Riku glared at Axel who only looked emotionlessly at the floor.

Sora tilted his head and looked to Riku scowling a sinister smile. "Okay, then…"

Roxas stood between the three boys; running away tempted him right about now. His stomach churned at the disgusted look on Riku's face, and Axel just took it. He stayed silent.

"What are you doing with him?" his turquoise glare was on Roxas now. "Didn't I tell you to stay away from him?"

Axel's hand laid loosely in Roxas's tight grasp, but Roxas was far too wound up to notice. Flames were licking his heart with every second that Riku was talking like that.

"He's my friend." Roxas finally spat out quietly.

Riku scoffed and grinned in hysteria, "Hasn't anyone told you yet?"

Roxas's heart raced in fear that Riku would say something to Sora now. No, he was certain that he would tell Sora now, and he wouldn't be as understanding as he was.

"There are worse things that could have been done." The usual blue eyes were dark behind his glasses. He stood defensively in front of the taller figure behind him now.

"Is someone going to tell me what is going on?" Sora glanced back and forth between the other three before crossing his arms.

"Yeah," Riku snarled and mimicked Sora by crossing his arms. "Axel here is a convict. He's a killer."

Roxas's heart melted before it dropped to his stomach. He observed Sora's expression in complete slow motion; his eyes grew wide and his face paled. Roxas was sure he was paler than Sora though.

Roxas tightened his hand on the other's when he finally noticed Axel was trying to pry away.

"You're a bastard." Roxas was snarling at Riku now. "You know he's not."

Sora was frantically looking between the two arguing boys now with his mouth hanging open.

"He is," Riku defended his point and clenched his fists. Roxas gave him a daring look.

"He killed his parents."

Roxas could already see the painful expression on Axel's face. He could see the wince without even looking. With the image in his head, all of his senses came rushing forward at once and Roxas didn't hesitate to snatch his hand away this time, lunging forward he drove his fist painfully hard against Riku's jaw. Everything sped up around him as he watched the silver headed boy falling to the floor and Sora's indistinct yelling and hand movements.

_What did you do that for?!__  
__Fuck, Roxas! Riku! What the fuck?!_

Two arms wrapped tightly around his waist. His vision fogged as his glasses slipped from his face and everything immediately came back into its proper time frame. He was being pulled back now. He quickly looked down to see the arms covered in familiar black clothing. His body spun around in the direction as a hand grabbed his and he began running behind the dark figure.

He could barely see and wouldn't have any idea where to go if it weren't for the black and red blob guiding him through the front of the shop. He could feel the merciless chill hitting his face as they exited the store. His breathing was quick and shallow as he struggled to keep up.

His hands finally slapped against the chilled metal, figuring it was Axel's car he quickly felt around until his fingers sunk into the handle. He took no time to swing the door open and slide in.

Roxas sat paralyzed in the passenger seat. He glanced over to see Axel was already sitting in the drivers seat. Both of them were panting and speechless.

"Axel," Roxas huffed out before averting his blurry vision to the red head. "I didn't mean to." He furrowed his brows and desperately tried to stutter out an apology.

Axel quickly extended his hand and cupped Roxas's face, pulling him closer as he met his lips in the middle.

Roxas's eyes shot open and his body paralyzed again. Unsure if this was an attempt to shush him or a heat of the moment kiss, he fought back the urge to dart away. Instead, his trembling ceased as he slowly fell into the kiss, applying the same amount of pressure back with his lips.

Axel quietly pulled away before exhaling the breath he had held too long. He slumped back into his chair and leaned his head against the head rest.

"We should go," he started up the ignition, "before that hot head finds us."

Roxas leaned back into his seat slowly before humming an agreement.


	7. Self-Control

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 7: Self-Control

* * *

Roxas didn't say another word as they changed their course to another market just out of town. There was no way in hell they could go back to their original shop and risk getting in Riku's way again. Roxas didn't want Axel to get into a fight. Especially not because of him.

He propped his head against his arm that laid against the window. Little did Axel know that he had taken his first kiss; not that Roxas was minding right about now. Despite the fact that he couldn't see and his hand hurt to the moon and back; tonight was one of the best nights he had in a while; and yet it felt so incomplete.

"I made a mess of everything, didn't I?" Roxas denied himself the pleasure of even looking Axel's way. He kept his blurry eyesight fixated on the darkness.

Axel still glanced at the blond before concentrating on the road. With a sigh he tightened his grip nervously on the steering wheel. "Why would you think that?"

Roxas quietly laughed sarcastically and waited for the correct answer. He knew Axel was playing stupid.

The red head nibbled his lip before adjusting in his seat. "You didn't mess anything up." He spoke hypnotically quiet.

Roxas droned quietly at the lie.

He lifted his head and sighed, finally turning his useless gaze to Axel. "Why did you kiss me?"

Axel sunk into his seat and chuckled quietly. "Sorry." He kept his eyes locked forward. "I won't do it again."

Roxas turned his attention back to the outside. "I didn't ask you not to," he muttered against the window, "I just wonder why."

The red head was grateful for his friend's blindness right now; his face was embarrassingly a lovely shade of crimson. Sadly he really didn't have an answer for Roxas.

"I really don't know." He admitted. "I just like you."

He glanced over again but Roxas showed no sign of emotion.

"So," Axel cleared his throat. "You quizzed me, why don't I ask a few questions now? If you're okay with it."

"Sure, go ahead."

Axel asked the first question that worried him right now.

"How old are you?"

"I'll be 17 on November 1st."

"Oh, good. I can be around for your birthday." He nervously urged Roxas to agree with that but only got a smile and a nod. It would do.

"Hm," Axel pondered again. "What do you want for your birthday?"

Roxas looked as if he thought about it for a moment but only shrugged. "I'm not too big on my birthday."

Axel nodded understandably. "I'll figure something out."

A tense silence fell into the car as Axel turned a corner and tried his best to keep a steady head.

"So what was life like for you in Twilight Town?"

Roxas straightened in his seat as if he was eager to answer. "Well, do you want the good, the bad or all of it?" His stomach churned a bit at the remembrance.

"All of it." Axel offered a smile as they came to a red light.

"Well," Roxas repeated. "My mom and dad were happily married." He fumbled his thumbs between his legs. He choked down the urge to hurl once Axel pressed on the gas again. No matter what he said, it wouldn't compare to how bad Axel's past was; that was reassuring in a way.

"Until I came along." He nibbled at the inside of his mouth nervously. "They dealt with me though. For a while. On my 6th birthday my mom told me she had a surprise for me – and this is too depressing, I don't want to mess up the night." Roxas whined and tilted his head towards the red head.

"It's fine. You won't mess up the night. You don't have to talk about if you don't want though."

Roxas sighed. "No, I do. You've told me so much, I owe you this at least." He looked back into the night and exhaled a trembling breath before calming himself. "She told me she had a surprise for me," he repeated while awkwardly fidgeting in his seat. "She took me upstairs and put me in a crib. I thought it was weird, even as a kid, I didn't know why I was in a crib again; but she assured me and told me to wait here, so I did. I waited a while until I started to get bored so I climbed out and ended up breaking my wrist on the fall. Don't ask me how," Axel unknowingly smiled, "but I did. I went downstairs and the entire place was on fire." Axel's smile quickly faded to a frown as he tensed in his seat. He glanced at the blond who looked deep in thought.

"I ran down the stairs – well, tumbled down the stairs." Roxas featherly laughed to himself. "I ran to the front door but it was locked from the outside. I tried to go to the backdoor but there was too much fire." Axel had pulled over at a gas station now and he looked at the blond with a confused expression.

"I opened some of the curtains at the front door and tried to open a window but there were nails in them. I remember them, too. I tried pulling them out." He held up his right hand that had a large but faint scar over his index finger. "Needless to say, it didn't work." He sighed before leaning back in his seat. "To make the story short; my mom locked me in a burning house and I never saw her or my dad again. Unless you count them walking away from the burning house. After that, I moved in with my uncle, Cloud and his son Sora – the boy you met at the store. I've lived with them for 11 years almost and it's been okay. I had a few friends that I left behind in Twilight Town but so did Sora. I don't know." He sighed again and rushed his story. "I just want to start over. I want to stop having nightmares about my parents." He chuckled to himself again.

Axel held a monotone expression and furrowed his brows, unsure if he was done with his story or not. He finally let out his held breath and searched for the right words to say.

"I'm sorry, Roxas." Axel internally cursed himself for the generic response. "I wish I knew what to say."

Roxas shook his head. "You and I have both had our deals. You don't need to say anything. I know you understand, just like I did." he smiled sadly at the still darkened figure. He squinted his eyes to look past him though.  
"Where are we?"

"Oh," Axel unbuckled his seat belt and reached for his wallet. "A gas station. They sell cat food here. I figured we could just run in and run out."

Roxas nodded. "I can't see, so you'll have to lead me."

Axel hadn't even noticed. "Er, hold on." He leaned over Roxas and opened the glove department before fumbling around some paper and what sounded like junk.

He finally pulled out a small pair of glasses and leaned back into his seat before extending a hand and tilting Roxas's chin up and made him face him. "I don't know if these will work – but," he slid the glasses carefully over the top of Roxas's ears and poked them closer to his face. "it's worth a shot?"

Roxas blinked as his vision became slightly clearer. It wasn't perfect but it was a lot better than the blind state he was in before. He looked to Axel and nodded. "I still can't see outlines, but I think it will be okay."

Axel offered Roxas a smile that made him melt. He missed that.

"I still don't mind holding your hand." He turned to get out of the car and Roxas did the same. Regardless of how well the glasses were he was dizzy as hell now.

He stumbled out of the car and carefully shut the door behind him before a hand slid into his reassuringly. He quickly turned his face to hide the crimson flush.

"Come on, let's get Roccia's food before he starves to death." Axel offered another smile before softly pulling him towards the shop.

They made their way into the warm shop, Axel gave another smile to the cashier who looked at them strangely; either because Axel looked like a punk or that two guys just came in holding hands. Or both. Roxas ignored the gesture along with Axel as they headed towards the back of the shop.

Roxas immediately grabbed a small can. "Chicken. Okay, let's go." Axel's eyes narrowed as he took the can in his hand.

"What's the rush?"

Roxas mumbled closely to Axel that the guy behind the counter is hawking them and he was uncomfortable. Axel smirked and lifted Roxas's chin before lowering his head closer to the blond's.

"Do you want to give him a show?" He softly cooed against Roxas's parted lips. He flashed a devilish smirk and leaned closer until Roxas could feel his warm breath ghosting against his lips. Roxas gulped and clenched the dark sweater in his fist. His eyes were full of desire and everything inside him wanted to pull the red head in and just melt into his arms.

All senses came back last second as Roxas shoved himself away from the lanky figure. "No, I don't want to put on a show." He finally mumbled before turning off with a red face. He could hear Axel snickering behind him as he walked towards the counter.

"I'm only messing with you." Axel trotted beside him with an intrigued smile.

So was the stirring heat between his legs. He casually fidgeted his sweater down to cover the bulge that was discomforting him. They had already gotten enough attention for the night. Roxas didn't feel like having to run away from something again.

He watched as the red head placed 4 small cans on the counter and handed over a 5 and waited for his change before shoving it lazily in his sleeping pants. He handed Roxas the full bag and took his free hand, leading him back out to the car.

Once again seated, Roxas squinted his eyes at the tiny numbers with a sigh.

"It's midnight already."

Axel observed the clock himself before nodding. "Time flies."

Roxas watched as he started to put the keys in the ignition again and quickly grabbed his hand before he was able to turn the keys.  
Axel immediately questioned if the blond was okay and turned to face him with concern.

"Axel," Roxas stared at the floorboard, keeping the warmer hand in his. He searched his thoughts, trying to think of the right way to tell Axel. He bit his lip before looking up into those riveting cat eyes. He was patiently waiting for Roxas and that only sped his heartbeat.

Finally, with a sigh, he quietly muttered. "When you kissed me back there, at the store," he lowered his head bashfully. "It was my first kiss."

Axel's breath hitched.  
"O-oh. I'm sorry, Roxas." He lowered his head like Roxas, only with shame. "I didn't mean to ruin it for you."

Roxas's hand tightened as he felt trembles wracking his body. He slowly shook his head before averting his eyes back to Axel's softened outline.  
"Will you…" he bit his lip and mustered all his confidence together. "Will you do it again?"

Axel joined Roxas's gaze before slowly linking their fingers together. He reached his hand out slowly to cup the porcelain skin against his palm again. "Are you sure?"  
Roxas nodded and softly stacked his hand over Axel's to give him a clear invitation.

He slowly used his hand to tilt Roxas's face upwards a bit and used his thumb to trace the soft features of Roxas's cheek. The moon and a single street light were the only thing that brightened the darkness outside now, and it was the only thing that was giving Axel the advantage to seeing every last feature on Roxas's flawless complexion. The blond glanced from the floorboard, to Axel's lips, to his eyes, lips again, then repeat. His lips were parted slightly and his eyes looked needy. The soft light outlined his shallow jaw line and glimmered against the blue of his eyes that weren't behind glass.

Feeling as if he'd kept him waiting long enough, Axel slowly leaned over the arm rest, turning his head as he narrowly watched Roxas mimicking his actions. He hitched only millimeters from the soft lips. Their breath fogged slightly from the outside cold but it was the warmest thing against Axel right now.

Axel closed the distance between the two; his lips claimed Roxas's hungrily. There wasn't a single wrong move despite the anxiety stirring in them both. Opening his mouth, Roxas welcomed the warm tongue with a soft purr that vibrated against Axel's lips causing his eyes to lull shut almost but he kept them open yet hidden, watching Roxas's desperate expression as he explored the unknown entrance.

Roxas whimpered in pleasure as he felt the red head's arms now wrapping around him and flexing against his frail body. The arm rest dug painfully into his stomach but he was far too lost to interrupt this moment.

With their lips locked, Axel used his embrace to pull the rag dolled blond into his lap. Roxas pulled away as he comfortably straddled Axel's lap. He held both hands softly to the red head's throat and trailed his nails down the dip of his tendons.

Axel's eyes glimmered in the limited light as he looked up at the angel like outline around Roxas. His arms were still tightly wrapped around his waist; he clung to him. He needed him, someone who loves him; someone who could always love him.

Their lips collided gently again, almost teasingly soft. Roxas faintly smirked at the gentle clawing at his back. He didn't deny Axel a kiss again. He cowered at the growl that Axel released as their tongues played together again.

Axel pulled away, leaning his head back against the head rest as he licked his lips with satisfaction. "This is getting too heated for you."

Roxas's face flushed; he didn't even need to look down to find the proof of that statement. He silently nodded with an internal groan.

"We should get back to your… thing." Roxas smiled softly at the red head who only laughed softly.

"Yeah," he released his grip on Roxas and helped him slump back into the passenger seat. "We should get back to my _cat_."

"Cat, thing, whatever." He clicked the seatbelt in place while Axel started up the car.

"Before that," Roxas nervously rubbed the back of his neck. "Could we go back to my place and get my contacts?"

Axel agreed without hesitation. "Do you think Riku will be there?"

Roxas let out an aggravated sigh. "Either way, just stay in the car." He glanced over to the red head who now held the same expression as he did before Roxas hit Riku.

He looked out the window again and internally cursed himself for allowing Riku to ruin the night.

He would have to make it up to Axel – somehow.

.*+*+*.

Roxas slumped over into his usual spot on the couch and curled up with a thick blanket that was already laid on the couch. He watched as Axel cooed against his cat's face and emptied a can of wet food into his bowl.

As happy as he was he couldn't help but think about how new this all was to him. Being with a guy is one thing, something completely off of his charts – but being with a convict, a grown man and getting turned on because of the foreplay they do was completely new territory. He hadn't even known Axel for more than a week and he was already fighting over him and dry humping him in a gas station parking lot.

He was so caught up in Axel he had even let his promise to Olette slip. He groaned quietly to himself knowing that he was going to get an earful from her later.

Axel finally walked to Roxas and lifted his stretched legs up before sliding underneath them. He carefully laid Roxas's legs back down into his lap before slumping against the opposite side of the loveseat.

"You finally sat next to me." Roxas's nose was stuffed up and everything he said sounded as if a third grader was talking. Axel couldn't stop laughing at him and telling him it's what he gets for going into the cold with wet hair.

Axel only shrugged. It was only now that Roxas noticed the bags under Axel's eyes were darker than before and his lips were practically matching his skin tone.

"When was the last time you slept?"

He lazily blinked and looked as if it took all the muscles in his body just to open his eyes back up again. "I don't know," he slurred quietly. "Maybe… two days ago."

Roxas's face twisted. He laid his glasses on the coffee table next to him before scooting to the very edge of the small couch. Grabbing Axel's wrist, he tugged him closer to spoon him to which he did. Axel nuzzled his head against Roxas's back gently and wrapped one arm around the skinny waist and rested his head on the other.

"Are you comfortable?" he nervously pressed his body closer to Axel's without looking back. It's not like he could see anyway.

Axel hummed an indecipherable response.

"What?"

Roxas lifted his head and waited for an answer that never came. He smiled to himself and listened to the soft breathing behind him. He held onto the motionless hand gently before closing his eyes and attempting to find some kind of slumber at nearly 4 in the morning.

.*+*+*.

Roxas's eyes fluttered open after wincing at the bright light coming from a large window. He groaned before reaching for his glasses and poking his eye twice before getting them on. Carefully lifting himself, he noticed the red head still sleeping in the same position behind him; fast asleep. Roccia mewed annoyingly at the couple on the couch and as soon as Roxas's feet touched the ground she leapt over to her food bowl and resumed crying.

Knowing where the food was and not wanting to wake the restless red head from his much needed sleep, he mimicked Axel's usual routine of feeding the fur ball.

He quietly observed the feline eating before finding his bag that still laid in the main hallway. He fumbled for his phone that he hadn't checked in a whole day.

17 missed calls and 6 unread text messages.

His stomach churned. 14 calls were from Sora, 2 from Cloud and 1 from Olette. All 6 messages were from Sora.

_call me back__  
__im not fucking around rox call me back NOW__  
__im going to call the police__  
__y did u even hit riku he didnt do anything__  
__u know cloud wouldnt like this__  
__riku told me everything u better come home NOW roxas_

He rolled his eyes at the empty threats. They hadn't even had the chance to stop by Roxas's place to pick up his contacts because Sora and Riku were practically guarding the door last night. They only drove by long enough to see that before they decided it wasn't the best idea.

An idea to text his cousin flashed in his mind but the idea faded as quickly as it came. That would be the stupidest thing to do right now, but if Cloud found out then it would be a whole other problem. The police would be involved. Him skipping school right now was bad enough, but at least it bought him time. For now they thought he was in school; hopefully.

He stuffed his phone back into his book bag and sighed before turning to face the motionless apartment. Axel would probably be asleep for a few more hours and that meant Roxas had to find something to do in the meantime.


	8. Elysium

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 8: Elysium

* * *

Roxas thought it was strange that he never heard of Axel and Axel never heard of him. It's not like Twilight Town was that huge; and it was hard to avoid the news happening. A house burning down with attempted murder of a child was kind of big news, and a teenager chopping his parents to death seemed like it would be something everyone heard about.

A precise tic started under his eyes as he considered the thought of snooping through Axel's apartment. If he got caught he would have to think of a damn good excuse though.

He pawed his eyes roughly.

No, that was a terrible idea. He needed to get it out of his head before it started chewing at his ideas. Snooping through Axel's place was probably the worst thing to do. If he got caught there was no excuse good enough. He tried to think of how he'd feel if he caught Axel going through his stuff and finally sighed the thought away.

He pushed himself from the wall he was leaning on and made his way to the bathroom. There, he splashed some cold water on his face and ran his wet fingers through his lazily spiked hair. He showered again to try to pass the time but it turned out only 15 minutes were wasted.

After all the sexual tension of last night his mind began to wonder of something else he could do…

Sitting on the closed toilet now, he glanced down to his toweled waist and bit his lip. His hand had already slipped underneath the cotton and was already fingering the hardness. His entire body radiated heat and embarrassment. He licked his lips, trying to taste yesterday's Axel and whimpered at the memory. Electricity tickled his veins thinking of the way Axel violated him last night, feeling their hardness grinding against one another, their tongues wrapping together, their heat against each other. A quiet groan slipped his lips. His shaft was already tangled in his grasp and precum substituted what he needed to already begin stroking.

"Axel…" he mindlessly whispered quietly to no one but himself and immediately shot his hand to cover his mouth while using the other to keep a steady pump on his shaft. He squeezed his eyes closed and quickened his strokes between the sensational thoughts.

He thought of the way he said his name, the saliva that webbed between their lips, the way he clawed at his back and pulled him in. Now letting his imagination in he began thinking of Axel inside him, fingering him and licking all over him, he gave his shaft one last squeeze before finished all over his recently showered skin. He clenched his fingers over his lips to keep the burning pressure in his throat from waking a certain someone; regardless of the deep sleep he was in, he wasn't going to test his luck.

Once the sensation mellowed and his shaft softened he quickly cleaned himself up and washed any evidence away. Probing through his bag that he brought with him, he dressed himself and stuffed the towel deep into a nearby hamper.

Exhaling deeply, he swung the door open and made his way out of the bathroom, more than relieved to find Axel was awake and sitting up on the couch. He slumped casually in the chair across from Axel and smiled at the groggy red head. His hair was a mess and his eyes were narrowed more than usual; probably swollen from the rough night of sleep.

"Good morning." Roxas offered a smile but Axel only hummed and nodded before sinking his head to meet his hands. "Not a morning person, huh?"

He chuckled when he only got another nod. On a nervous whim, Roxas lifted himself and plopped down next to the redhead, wrapping an arm around his back and pulling him into his lap. Axel didn't deny the gentle hold and let his head fall into the blond's lap.

"Want to go get some breakfast?" Axel mumbled, his voice was raspy and harsh and it reminded Roxas of a chain smoker. He lowered his head to nuzzle the red hair, giggling quietly against the shell of Axel's ear.

"Are you sure you can drive?" he cooed sweetly into the tangled hair.

Axel nodded softly before lifting himself from Roxas's lap, surprising the frail blond with a kiss; one that didn't last long enough in Roxas's opinion. He didn't even have time to return the kiss before Axel lifted from the couch and dragged his feet to his bedroom.

He paced back and forth between the two rooms across the hall from one another until he finally returned to Roxas with a new change in clothes. A simple black hoodie with a tight white shirt that showed off the definition of his torso underneath and black skinnies with his usual leather black boots. A simple get up for Axel.

He held out a tan jacket with fake white fur at the hood and sleeves, offering it to Roxas.

"It's cold outside today; you might want something a little thicker than your sweater." He dangled the jacket over Roxas who eventually took it with an arched brow.

"Whose jacket is this?"

"Mine." Now turned and focusing his attention on the bills stacked on the counter, he glanced back at Roxas and saw the "I doubt that" look he held. He rolled his eyes and smiled before turning back around. "I've had it since I was younger. I can't fit into it anymore, but it was pricey so I kept it."

Roxas nodded before finally slipping it on. It was a bit too big but still warmer than the thin sweater he had on now. He looked to Axel who was scribbling onto numerous papers now, still leaned over his kitchen counter. He attempted to peek over his shoulder from the couch.

"What're you doing?" he asked before tilting his head when their gazes met.

"Bills." Axel sighed and kept his focus on what was in front of him. "One of the glory moments of being an adult. I just need to do them so I can drop them into the mailbox before we go."

Roxas nodded even though he knew Axel wasn't looking to him.

A smirk split across Axel's face seconds later and he began shaking his head. Turning around to Roxas he motioned for him to get up and slapped his hands lazily to his thighs. "Forget it, I'm hungry. Let's go." He rushed Roxas up, linking his arm with his and tugging him playfully off the couch. "Come on, c'mon, c'mon!"

Roxas stumbled to get up and keep his balance as he was dragged completely from the house and to the car.

"Where t-" Axel stopped in mid-sentence and chuckled softly while starting up the car. "I don't know why I even thought of asking that. You don't know any restaurants around here, do you?"

Roxas smiled and shook his head while hugging the warmth of Axel's jacket to him. Axel only nodded and flipped a switch before leaning back into his seat with a sigh.

"We have to wait for the windows to defrost." He looked to Roxas who was observing the windows covered in complete ice. The top of the car was completely blanketed in snow and it fell onto the windshield; he only just now noticed how badly it snowed last night.

"Can I stop by my house to get my contacts?"

Axel shrugged and nodded. "Won't your family be home?"

Roxas cursed quietly to himself. He had forgotten about Sora.  
"I can sneak in through my window. Just park a block away or so and I'll hurry in and out."

After a few moments of pondering it himself he hesitantly nodded at the blond's idea with a long sigh. "Just don't get into any trouble. I don't want to go to prison for kidnap." He furrowed his brows and looked at Roxas with a desperate look on his face.

Roxas only nodded and smiled sadly. He hadn't even thought of getting Axel in trouble…

.*+*+*.

Roxas's POV

The car ride was quiet as usual; worry flooded both of their minds but Roxas's heart ached at the thought of leaving Axel now. Their time together was too good to just go.

He sighed quietly to himself and stuffed his fists into the pockets of Axel's jacket; already walking down the icy sidewalk. Axel was parked around the corner and waiting for him. He didn't even bring his phone and he cursed himself for not. If something happened Axel would have to just assume it.

Relief poured over him when he saw Cloud's car wasn't parked at home and all the lights in the house appeared to be off. Sora was probably still asleep.

He jogged quickly to his bedroom window and peered in past the snow and ice. His door was still shut, too. This was going better than expected.

With that thought he quietly lifted the window and slipped in. He eyed his contact case through his foggy glasses and tiptoed across his room. He shoved them into the jacket pocket and quietly eyed his bedroom door. This was going too well, there had to be something wrong. Why was Cloud even gone? And it was noon. Sora would have been awake by now.

He silently opened his door with his fearful thoughts ringing in the back of his head; thoughts of his parents coming back and doing something to ruin his life. Paranoia flooded him.

Carefully poking his head around every corner of his house he finally ended up in the kitchen, and that's when he heard it – the quiet scream and a thud from the other side of the house. His heart deflated as he paced quickly to the now ringing silence. His cousin's name got stuck in his throat and his hand trembled on the door knob. He balled his other fist and without a second thought, swung the only unchecked room's door open in one swift movement.

.*+*+*.

Axel's POV

_Did Riku hit him back?_

Axel sat bored in the driver's seat, with the car still running and the heater on full blast. In his time of wait he found himself texting Namine. He spared her the details of he and Roxas's make out session and rather told her how he knocked the lights out of Riku.

_No, but after I saw how bad Riku's nose was bleeding I honestly blacked out. I think Roxas did too but I was lucky enough to grab him and run the hell out of there._

Lucky for him as well, Namine texted back as quickly as he did; and she was a good speller. Axel wasn't a grammar Nazi, but he could appreciate someone for typing thoroughly for him.

_Wow. That's good. I think Riku deserves what he gets TBH._

_Me too. I mean I don't have a problem with him… I never have. It was always him._

_Riku is just a bully. I hope he doesn't target Roxas now._

Axel's body tensed at the thought.

_I hope not._

He would fight Roxas's fights for him if it came to that. He doesn't deserve to get caught up in this mess.

_So you two are together now?_

_What do you mean by together?_

_I mean, are you two a thing? (:_

He blushed at the thought.

_No, he's too young._

_So? You dated Xion when you were 16 and she was 13._

_That was different._

_Why, because she was a girl?_

His body tensed and heated.

_No, because I didn't want to fuck her brain-dead._

Namine took a few minutes to reply. Probably debating on what to say to that.

_Oh, yeah. Wow._

_Forget it._

_Why don't you just date him anyway? You love him don't you, or at least like him?_

_I think I do._

_Then be with him for him. If it comes to sex, make sure you're both ready and there won't be a problem. Besides, you can only go to prison if it was rape… he's 16 and he's got his own voice._

Axel sighed and sat his phone down to rub his temples. That wasn't what he was afraid of. He was really afraid of getting Roxas involved with his disaster of a life. He sighed instead of replying and sat his phone back onto the dashboard where it always sat. Roxas had been gone for at least 20 minutes now.

He shook his leg anxiously and nibbled on his lip as he glared in the direction that Roxas should return from.

_If he's not back in 10 more minutes, I'm going up there._ Axel nodded at his thought.


	9. Harakiri

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 9: Harakiri

* * *

"You're sleeping with him?!" Roxas wasn't one to judge his cousin but after all the shit that asshole has said about Axel, this infuriated him.

Sora rolled off of the boy underneath him and frantically reached for the sheets and blankets to cover himself, Riku in front was shielding him since he already had himself covered.

"Roxas!" Sora peered over Riku's body, "How long have you been there?!"

"Long enough." Roxas scoffed before slamming the door shut and making his way towards the front door.

"Roxas!" He heard Sora's muffled yelling from the other room. He ignored them in hopes he could get out quicker than his cousin could get out of bed.

_Of course not._

He was pulled back viciously and spun around to face the red faced brunette.

"Where have you been?" Sora finally lowered his voice and his startled face had softened.

"With Axel – the _murderer_." He emphasized with air quotes as he saw Riku walking from the bedroom.

Sora glanced back at his lover before pursing his lips and giving all his attention to Roxas.

"I don't think you should be with him."

"I don't think you should listen to everything you hear or judge before you know." Roxas snapped back.

"Roxas, you don't _know_ –" Riku attempted to cut in but Roxas only cut him off.

"No, Riku – I do _know_." He stepped past his cousin, ready to finish their fight. He shook the brunettes grasp on his wrist off and halted only a foot from Riku. "I know that Axel didn't want to do it and I know he's not the asshole you make him seem like. Really, _you're_ the asshole."

He felt like he was giving some cheesy lecture but at this point he was too pissed to care what he said as long as he got his point across.

"Roxas, stop!" Sora stomped between the two and faced Roxas. "You two need to stop fighting!"

"I'll stop fighting once this pathetic fuck does!" Roxas's voice raised again; unsure of what he was really saying. His head was spinning with rage and words just oozed like honey from his clenched teeth. He could hardly recognize himself as he yelled at the stranger in his home. He never fought for someone before.

"Roxas!" Sora's voice was hoarse now and tears sat patiently in his eyes. That was the only thing that snapped Roxas out of his fury. With one last scoff he turned back around, snapping his arm away from Sora's attempted grasp and slamming the door behind him.

He kept his head down as he walked right into the tall figure. He couldn't face those eyes right now.

"What's happening in there?" Roxas couldn't see it but Axel's eyes were wide and concerned.

"Nothing." The blond gripped Axel's wrist a little too tight for his comfort but Axel followed anyway.

"It sounded like something to me."

"Just," Roxas growled in aggravation. "Leave it alone." He stopped in front of the passenger side of the car that was now parked in front of his house and waited for Axel to unlock the door.

He heard Axel sigh from behind him, flinching at the cloth wrapping around his neck. "You left your scarf in my car you know." He could hear the smile on Axel's face.

"Are you getting enjoyment from my anger?" he leaned eagerly against the bitter metal.

"I think you're cute when you're mad, if that's what you mean." Two arms wrapped gently around his waist and Axel propped his head against Roxas's shoulder. The wind blew harshly against Roxas's damp cheeks. He didn't notice he was crying until now.

He sighed deeply before he hugged himself and wrapped his arms with Axel's. His chin trembled now, unsure of why he was really crying he tried to quietly sniffle the tears back but he knew Axel knew when he felt his arms tighten around him.

"What happened?" Axel whispered quietly against the crook of the blond's neck.

"I-" Roxas bit the end of his sentence with a short sob. Shaking his head, he struggled to speak. "I… don't understand why… everyone is so mean to you." he trailed off with quiet whimpers and sniffles. "You've been so kind to me, I just-" he shook his head to substitute his silence.

Axel only smiled against the soft skin. "Don't worry so much about me, Roxas."

Roxas shook his head again, finally letting his tears pour out with sobs that were a little louder than he cared to admit. "Why did you do this to me? How did you even do this to me?" Roxas reached behind him to hold the face leaning against his hair.

Axel's breath hitched and his heart stung a little from his comment. "What did I do?"

Roxas opened his mouth to speak but it stopped when he heard the front door slamming shut. The couple turned around to watch Riku stepping down from the small slab of cement under the door. He shot them both a cold glare, one that they were too softened to return. Instead Axel forced Roxas to turn back around, keeping him in his grasp. He could hear the snow crunching closer. His heart sunk with every footstep. Riku had to ruin everything for him.

"Roxas, Sora wants to talk to you."

Axel's chin now rested on the top of Roxas's head. He wasn't going to stop him from going but he really wished he wouldn't.

Roxas remained silent, staring into the passenger window blankly.

Riku exhaled with an aggravated tone. "I'm not over here to fight. Go talk to your cousin for the love of God, he's worried about you."

"There's nothing to be worried about." Roxas bitterly grimaced without turning his head. Axel looked back at Riku with a deathly glare, challenging him to say another word.

Riku must have caught on because he only narrowed his eyes before walking away. Being the kind hearted asshole that Axel was, he sighed and unraveled his arms.

"You should go talk to Sora." He smiled sadly at the blond who turned around with tears still in his eyes.

Axel wiped them away when they finally fell.

"No, I want to be with you." Roxas gripped the edges of Axel's jacket and looked at him with pleading eyes that made Axel's heart sink. But he was firm on his opinion.

"I'll always be here." He placed a warm kiss on Roxas's forehead and offered a reassuring smile before making his way to the driver's side of his car. "I'll drop your stuff off to you in school tomorrow."

Roxas didn't say anything. He only nodded and watched the black car disappear behind a series of houses and trees. With a sad sigh, he turned around and made his way into the house.

Knowing Sora was waiting for him, he made his anger obvious with a slam of the front door. He could pull those puppy eyes all he wanted but that wouldn't stop Roxas's urge to hit him right in the face for letting that bastard in their house; and _him_. Roxas had a feeling that Sora was going to take Riku's side when it all boiled down. He wouldn't listen to Roxas if his life relied on it. He glared at the waiting brunette.

"What do you want?"

Sora shook his head before lowering his blue eyes to the newly shined wooden floor. His eyes looked sad and his former thought made him feel slightly guilty.

"I just want to know that you know what you're doing." Sora flashed his navy blue eyes at the glare of Roxas's glasses before looking back to the floor. Probably trying to read Roxas's mind.

"I know what I'm doing."

"Really, Roxas," he stepped forward, closer to Roxas. "I'm not going to tell you to stop talking to this Axel guy, I won't fight with him, hell –" he waved his hands at his sides and furrowed his brows "I'll be friends with the guy. I don't know what happened to him as a kid and it's none of my business. I just don't want him to hurt _you_."

The older extended his arms, to which Roxas sadly fell into them, wrapping his arms around Sora's thin waist. His thoughts before were definably making him feel guilty now.

"Don't be mad at me for Riku, either."

Roxas didn't have much room to argue right now so he only nodded against the boney shoulder. "I'm sorry." He quietly mumbled, letting Sora's heat sink into his chilled skin.

"Don't be sorry. We all stop thinking when we fall in love." He pulled away and offered a reassuring smile to Roxas. "Besides," he left the blond and walked towards the kitchen, still only in some basketball shorts, "this is your first love. I won't mess that up for you, and I won't let Riku either."

He somehow doubted that. Roxas nodded again though, not wanting to argue.

"So tell me about him." he tossed an apple to Roxas who flinched in time to catch it. "I mean, did you see Riku's face? You almost broke his nose and he might have a permanent scar under his eye."

He wondered how Sora was laughing about that but found himself sheepishly smiling at the hinted compliment.

"This Axel guy must be important." His tone turned sincere again. He kept his eyes locked on Roxas as the two slumped up into the bar stools.

Roxas nodded again, blushing now. "I think I really like him."

Sora hungrily gnawed on his own apple while Roxas spun his between his hands on the bar.

"Tell me about him for the third time!" the brunette grinned, running his fingers through his chocolate hair.

Again Roxas found himself sheepishly smiling. "He's really nice." His smile slowly turned into a frown. "He said he killed his parents when he was a teenager. He used to live in Twlight Town, so I don't know why we haven't heard about it. But apparently his parents beat him and they sold his sister to some… whore house." Roxas grimaced at the words, unsure if they were right.

"Despite that," a faint smile tugged his lips, "he's sweet. He's really just… nice. And understanding. I can't explain it." He shrugged and looked at the concentrating brunette. "And he plays the cello." He added and the two grinned, knowing it was Sora's favorite instrument.

"I'm glad he makes you happy, and now that you mention it, I did hear something like that a long time ago." Sora's gaze turned serious but his face looked confused. "Something about a kid, uh," he stuttered, trying to remember and snapped his fingers eagerly. "It was… Lea, I think. I knew him."

Roxas furrowed his brows and tilted his head. "Lea?"

Sora shrugged, "Yeah, his name was Lea. They said he murdered his parents in their bed. He was 15 years old I think." He nodded as if things were coming back. "Yeah, you were like, 12 or 13 I think, maybe that's why you don't know; you were still in 5th grade. But him and I were in the same middle school class in 6th grade."

"Do you think it's the same person?" Roxas strained his thoughts now.

"Uh, it has to be." Sora said snobbish tone, but Roxas knew he meant no offence. "It's not every day that a kid butchers their parents and makes it in the news."

Roxas, frustrated now, ran his fingers through his hair. "Then… but…" he shook his head, nothing adding up. "Do you remember the whole story?"

"Something about…" he pondered for a moment. "This kid found his dad's axe outside and hacked his dad first but didn't kill him instantly so his mom practically watched her husband get killed in front of her. Apparently they begged him to stop but he just kept going and screaming 'you killed her'. His mom survived because the police arrived from a noise complaint, so he didn't have time to get to her except once. She died after telling the story though. Bled out." Sora looked to the blond who held a twisted face.

"What happened to him?"

Sora shrugged again. "They sent him to a mental institution and he was never heard from again."

"But…"

"Maybe he changed his name." Sora added, eyeing Roxas from under his lashes.

Roxas nodded. "That's the only thing that makes sense."

He nodded to the blond before standing up to throw his apple core away. "I would want to change my name after something like that." He pat Roxas's shoulder lightly before turning away.

"Where are you going?" Roxas looked up from his dreidel of an apple.

"I'm going to go shower. You should get to rest before Cloud gets home. He got a job and he's probably going to take us out to celebrate."

Roxas waited until he heard the bathroom door close and shower water come on before walking to his room. He closed the door behind him and sighed. His window was still open and the room was freezing now.

He started to close the door but stopped, noticing a phone in his windowsill.

It was Axel's. Had he been in his room?

He peeked his head outside and looked around but no one was there. He sat inside the windowsill, accepting the now comforting bitterness in the air. He turned the screen on and a message appeared as soon as he did. From his phone.

_I remembered that you forgot your phone, so just take mine. I'll use yours and you can use mine until tomorrow. Is that okay?_

He smiled to himself, nuzzling the edge of the window in an attempt to hide his face from no one.

_yea that's fine thanks_

He didn't take his eyes from the phone, knowing he'd reply soon, and he did.

_Good, because I don't want to miss you._

He grinned even winder. He came to the conclusion that Axel wasn't hiding anything from him. If he trusted him with his phone, that meant he trusted Roxas.

He pushed the thoughts back fully, figuring it was best not to stir up anymore dust than he already had.

.*+*+*.

Roxas and Axel had spent the next hour on the phone and now Sora sat in the front seat of Cloud's overly dramatic red sports car teasing Roxas about being in a 'honey-moon stage'. Cloud joined in after only minutes and began teasing about marriage and adopting babies. As much of an irritated show Roxas put on the comments were secretly making him grin as he texted Axel all the details.

_Oh, sounds good. Want to get married?_

Roxas giggled quietly.

_No way!_

_Ouch, Rox, I'm hurt._

_pft and still in high school_

_Touché._

"Okay, Roxas," Cloud glanced at him from the rearview mirror, "Try not to text during dinner."

Roxas nodded and quickly told Axel he'd be going to dinner now. He stuffed the phone in the jacket that he wore that belonged to Axel, forgetting to give it back. He fixed his scarf around his neck and readied himself while Cloud parked.

"Now um," Cloud parked and quickly turned around to face Roxas. "Zack and his wife will be there, so let's not… um, you know." He nodded to Roxas who nodded back.

"What?" Sora joined Cloud in looking back but the two just shook their head. "I want to know the secret, too!" he whined as everyone unpiled from the car.

"Shut up, Sora." Cloud faintly smiled at the two boys before walking in front.

Roxas chuckled and innocently shrugged at the pouting Sora preformed.

"Whatever," Sora poked his lip out. "You guys are lame anyway." He locked his hands behind his head as everyone walked closer to the exit. Roxas only rolled his eyes, not wanting to worry Cloud by keeping the topic up anymore.

The restaurant was crowded more than ever but Cloud somehow managed to find Zack and Aerith in the crowd of tables. Another girl was sitting with them, someone from Roxas's school. He just couldn't remember what her name was.

They snaked through the tables until they were each three greeted by a soft hug from Aerith and a firm handshake from Zack – though Roxas wasn't very sure on wanting to touch Zack or Cloud with a 10 foot pole as he remembered their game of Twister in his livingroom. He chuckled awkwardly and pushed the traumatic image back as he shook the man's hand.

"This is our daughter," the two stepped aside to reveal the smiling redhead already seated at the table. "Kairi."

"Hey! I'm Sora." Sora beamed a grin towards her and she smiled sweetly back.

"Nice to meet you, Sora; and you're Roxas right?"

She made no attempts at getting up from her chair or shaking hands, only offered a smile.

Roxas nodded and waved slightly. "Yeah, I remember you from lunch. Riku introduced us." Everyone was seating at the table now.

"Ugh," Zack scoffed. "You still talk to that ass?"

Kairi rolled her eyes. "Yes, dad, I still talk to that ass." She sarcastically sneered.

"Language, you two." Aerith smiled at her family. "These two are so smug, you can tell she's his daughter." She offered the same smile to Cloud now.

.*+*+*.

The dinner went by quicker than usual. It was mostly about catching up and congratulating Cloud on getting his new job. The younger ones were left out of most of the conversation until they finished their meal and decided to step out together while the adults finished up reminiscing.

They stood outside now, Kairi held a burning cigarette between her lips and stared softly at the falling snow.

"I wouldn't have taken you for a smoker." Roxas teased at her, watching Sora make snow castles in the emptier park of the parking lot.

Roxas only got a glimpse of her smile and pick the cigarette from her lips as he averted his attention to her instead of his childish cousin.

"I guess people do what they have to do to calm down." She shrugged and returned the cigarette to her mouth. Roxas nodded, not able to relate, but understanding.

"What are you worked up about?"

She chuckled as she took one long drag from her cigarette before flicking it off into the lot. She skeptically observed Roxas before exhaling the smoke and chilled fog.  
"Can I trust you?"

Roxas nodded sincerely.

She observed him for a few more seconds before inhaling sharply. "I think I'm gay."

He blinked in confusion. "So?"

Kairi laughed sheepishly. "And I think I love my best friend."

Roxas made an 'o' with his lips before turning to face Sora again. He was completely out of earshot.  
"So what's the problem?"

Kairi adjusted her weight between her legs frequently and it was obvious she was uncomfortable. "I don't know if she likes me back." Her eyes were fixated on the snow again.

Nodding he expressed how he understood.

She opened her mouth, closed it, but opened it again and narrowed her eyes. "Could you do me a favor?"

Roxas looks at her from the corner of his eye. "What?"

"Would you… if I told you who it was… could you talk to them for me? I could help you out."

Roxas nodded but interrupted her request. "What are you saying you'd do for me?"

She shrugged aimlessly. "I could stop Riku from bothering you." she glanced at his confused expression. "I know he bothers you. Aqua tells me about it."

He understoodably nodded. "Sounds like a damn good deal then." He scoffed and laughed with the maroon girl.

"That's who it is."

Roxas's face twisted. "Riku?" his voice pitched embarrassingly high and he was sure that's what she was over there laughing about.

"No, no." She shook her head and smiled. "Aqua."

"Oh," Roxas pursed his lips and nodded confidently. "I can do that."

"Don't… make it obvious." She furrowed her brows. "Just… see if she maybe feels the same way?"

Roxas smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry. I'll figure something out."

.*+*+*.

By the time the Strife and Hikari family made it come it was half past midnight and Axel had fallen asleep before Roxas got to say goodnight. Cloud rushed Roxas to get to bed as soon as they got home, telling him that there was no way he'd wake up for school tomorrow. Not wanting to risk a call home, he didn't hesitate to listen, crawling into his bed and letting his locked back finally unwind. He stared at his roof eager to see Axel tomorrow, and within minutes of thinking he quickly fell to sleep.

.*+*+*.

Roxas's eyes fluttered softly against the sunlight that poured into his room. He bolted up as he realized he didn't have a nightmare last night; the first time in years. He smiled at the thought but didn't stall his schedule. He quickly got dressed, skipping his shower since he took two yesterday.

He stepped into the cold hallway and found Sora in his usual spot. Cloud was still sleeping and Roxas only predicted it was with Zack locked behind that door. He pushed the thought back again.

The two ate breakfast together, as always. Roxas was thankful that Sora woke up with him or else mornings would just be cold and depressing.

A loud knock on the door caused the two to jump and Sora actually fell out of his stool to which Roxas didn't bother doing anything but cackling hysterically at the blushing brunette until tears poured down his cheeks.

"Thanks for helping!" he lifted himself and rubbed his head.

Roxas laughed all the way to the door and wiped his eyes, sniffling as he opened the door to where his smile quickly turned into a frown. He sighed and spun around.

"It's for you, Sora." He said as he lifted his bag up from the sofa and pushed roughly past Riku to start his walk to school early.

He could hear Sora stumbling to the door. "Bye, Roxas!"

He waved without turning; not wanting to see what those two had planned.

Roxas still wore Axel's jacket and practically suffocated himself trying to inhale every bit of his scent. He had completely forgotten about Riku by the time he made it to the school and he was immediately greeted by Namine who led him to Axel's usual hang out; the library.

They laughed sweetly as Roxas explained how Sora tipped over in his stool, explaining the priceless expression on his face before he hit the ground.

"You're so cruel, Roxas." She smiled before frowning. "Uh oh."

She clenched Roxas's arm and held him back as they ducked behind the library's main desk. They peeked over to see Axel talking to Xion.

"What's-"

She hushed him.

He whispered this time. "What are we doing?"

She motioned for him to watch, so he did.

Axel was just talking to Xion…

And Xion was holding his hand.

Roxas's heart felt like it was going to explode. Unsure if it was jealousy or confusion. Did Namine know about them? Why was she making him watch this?

And that's when his heart deflated entirely. Xion quickly jumped on her tippy toes and placed a peck against Axel's lips. Namine quickly covered her mouth and turned her back to the desk. Roxas stared patiently and hurt.

He watched Axel glance around the room.

_Xion, you've got to stop doing that._

He furrowed his brows. Were they a thing?

_Axel, why did we break up?_

That answered his question.

_Because, Xion, come on. That was years ago. Please let this go._

_But Axel-_

_Xion, stop. I've moved on. You need to do the same._

Roxas silently rose to his feet now, observing the scene from only 10 feet away at most. Namine yelled in a whisper for him to get down and tugged at his hands. A little too loud at one point, the two turned to face Roxas.

He watched as Xion's face turned a deep maroon and without another word she fled through the emergency exit of the library.

Roxas glared at Axel with a confused expression.

Namine finally rose and darted to the door her sister had run out of. This only left Axel and Roxas in the library now, staring at one another in silence.

It was Axel who broke it.

"Roxas, I-"

"It's fine." He sadly smiled at the red head. "We're not even together, who am I to control you?"

He awkwardly clapped his hands together before nodding and walking off, leaving Axel to run after him and grab his arm. "No, Roxas, it's not like this."

He shook his arm away gently, offering another smile. "Really, it's okay."

Attempting to walk away again, Axel only grabbed him again before spinning him around entirely and quickly capturing his lips in a rough kiss. It lasted only seconds but the feeling burned on Roxas's lips.

"It's not – Xion is an ex. I told you, anyway, I'm gay."

Roxas looked to their feet now and nodded.

"I guess so." He sighed deeply but still attempted to walk away from Axel. He only grabbed him again.

"Where are you going then?"

Roxas shrugged, still a bit confused. "I… guess class. We have first period together. You can walk with me you know."

Axel dumbly nodded before joining Roxas in his walk.

When they entered the class everyone had already seated. Even Namine and Xion where in their seats; and when Xion saw Roxas, her entire face flushed and she buried her face in her arms.

The couple sat on both sides of Namine, where they usually sat, only awkwardly now. Roxas stared at the desk before his phone appeared on it.

"Oh," he mumbled under the teacher lecturing in the background and pulled out Axel's phone, handing it over to him and putting his own into his pocket. For some reason this felt like a break up to him. A really awkward one being performed in front of a crowd.

He pursed his lips before looking up to Aqua, remembering what Kairi said. It was too good of a deal to pass up. How to win her over for Kairi was the question, though. He tried observing her to get some kind of information but eventually broke his gaze before it got too creepy.

He didn't dare look up at Xion who sat right in front of him. It was difficult not to look straight ahead but he painfully managed.

"Now raise your hand if you're in drama class." Was the only word he heard the teacher droning. He remembered he was; he was in third period drama. He silently raised his hand.

"Okay, keep them up." He stared at his desk but assumed she was counting.

"Okay," she repeated, "so only Namine, Demyx, Aqua, Xion, Roxas, Vexen and Axel?" She irritably sighed. Roxas lowered his hand and glanced over to Axel with an even more confused look than before. He looked back with a shrug. He didn't look like a drama kind of guy.

"Well, everyone in drama has to report to Leon's drama class during second period. There's a play and everyone in his class _must_ attend."

"What's the play?" a stray voice asked.

"Romeo and Juliet."

What a cliché school play. Roxas groaned eternally. He had no way out of this.

.*+*+*.

The bell rang finally and the small group of kids from his first period gathered outside of the drama room, waiting for the teacher to finally come and unlock the door.

He stood awkwardly beside Axel as he felt Xion's glare directed at the couple; he kept his eyes locked to the ground.

"Sorry I'm late," Mr. Leon walked through the separating crowd and unlocked the door, allowing everyone to pile in.

Kairi, Riku and his friend Larxene showed up with a few unfamiliar faces.

They all seated in some seats that were theatrically placed in front of a small stage which the teacher got onto and began speaking with his booming voice.

"Okay, good everyone is here." He smiled to his audience. "I only have two classes, so that's why there's so few of you."

He pulled out a bundle of notes from the bag he had prepared on stage.

"I already picked out who will be who, if you haven't heard – we're performing Romeo and Juliet." He smiled again as he held up the paper, adjusting some glasses to his face.

"Roxas," he looked to the crowd until he saw his pupil, "You'll be Romeo."

He eternally cursed himself again. Of course.

"Namine," he repeated his glance, "You'll be –"

_Juliet_, Roxas thought.

"– Juliet."

_Of course._

"Riku, you'll be Mercutio, Romeo's best friend." Roxas barked an absurd laughter at the irony. "Roxas, is there a problem with that?"

He only shook his head and glanced at the silver headed boy sitting behind him. When did he even get here? Wasn't he supposed to be with Sora? He narrowed his eyes before turning back around.

"Axel, you'll be Tybalt. A loyal servant to Juliet and you will die rather than to shake hands with a Montague."

Axel smiled sweetly at Roxas, "No hard feelings." He whispered before looking back to Namine with a wink. Roxas couldn't help but laugh.

"Aqua, you'll be Friar Lawrence; a friend to both the Montague's and Capulet's. And I also understand this role is fit for a man, but I think you'll do for the part."

Aqua held her hands up and smiled. "I'm fine with it."

"Good," he nodded and looked back at his sheet of paper. "Xion, you'll be Juliet's Nurse – the caretaker of lovely Juliet. You raised her from birth and you would kill and die for her."

Xion nodded with a sad smile.

"Demyx, you'll be sir Capulet and your lady will be Larxene."

Larxene scoffed and rolled her eyes at the blond who didn't look so happy either.

"Vexen, you'll be Montague; which leaves you Kairi, to be his lady."

The two nodded understandingly.

Leon finished assigning the other students to play background roles and finally broke the class. "We have the next week, you're all excused from class to learn your parts so get started. We're performing for the Destiny Theaters!" he grinned at the class who boredly cheered.

Papers were passed around that had scripts written on them. Roxas sighed as he skimmed through the large stack of papers.

"Looks like we have to kiss." Namine appeared beside him giggling with Axel. "I hope you won't be too jealous, Axel."

He smirked and wrapped an arm around Roxas's shoulder. "I might just have to kill you, Roxas."

Roxas's heart thumped harshly at the comment. He knew he was referring to the play, but something triggered inside him; he quickly buried it though and smiled. "Can't wait." He looked back to his papers nervously as the other two cackled beside him.

He glanced up to the small girl across the room who stared sadly at the couple. Xion.

He sighed aggregately. This was going to be hell.


	10. Apprehension

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 10: Apprehension

* * *

"Roxas are you okay?"

Of course I wasn't okay. How did I even end up in this mess? I just arrived and I'm already jealous of someone's ex-girlfriend. Since when do I even get jealous?

"Are you smoking?"

Yes, I'm smoking Axel, can you please leave me be?

That's what I wanted to say at least. I knew it was Axel behind me. I knew his voice far too well for my own good now. I knew it was Axel who picked my cigarette from my fingers and I knew it was him who viciously turned me around into a bone crushing embrace.

"What do you want?" Did you see me crying? Should I show you the hold you have on my heart or should I keep on some fake masculine mask? Which would you prefer?

"I want you to tell me what's wrong with you."

I shook my head and kept my arms dangling to my side. This was none of my business. I'm just the new kid who came in at the wrong time and fucked everything up. I couldn't leave though. I was sworn here.

"Don't give me this bullshit anymore." He pulled away and looked into my eyes; he forced me to look into his and he looked past the tears and contacts, he was looking into everything. It was violating. He was making me weak. "Tell me what the fuck is wrong, Roxas."

"Remember when I asked you why you did this to me?"

He nodded as if he feared the answer. I wish I could reassure him that I wouldn't ever hurt him intentionally.

I pulled away, turned my back to him and readied to walk away.

"I think I love you."

I didn't look back. I just walked away. I don't know what he did, I don't know if he said anything because my heart was beating too hard in my ears; but I just walked. I don't know why. Maybe I'm scared to fall in love. Maybe I'm scared of rejection.

.*+*+*.

"I think I love you."

My heart snagged on my own breath.

"What?" I tried to exhale, I couldn't breathe. He loved me? Why was he walking away then? I jumped forward, yanking back tightly on his sleeve. I couldn't even control myself but I pulled him in. I ignored his yelp and took over his body, slamming his into mine so hard I actually knocked the breath from both of us. I didn't give him time to breathe, I balled his shirt collar into my fist and forced him into a kiss.

.*+*+*.

Axel lifted Roxas to his tippy toes by the collar of his undershirt; with Roxas's eyes wide with fear and confusion he pressed him lips roughly against his, giving him no time to comprehend what was happening. He didn't deny Axel access; he never denied him anything. He wrapped his arms around Axel's neck and rose for himself, letting Axel's hands wonder and clench his sides. It was a painful embrace. Roxas dug his nails into the back of Axel's neck and Axel dug his into the soft flesh on Roxas's hips. Their lips irritated and shaded into a deep red from the rough kiss but it didn't stop them.

Short of breath, Axel pulled from the blond's lips and took his chance to capture his neck, placing warm kisses around his jaw until he made it to the lobe of his ear where he nipped the soft flesh.

Roxas whimpered quietly, leaning his head back to provide more room for the taller. Their bodies were still pressed tightly together when Axel flexed his arms around Roxas's small waist. It was Axel's turn to get overheated. He grinded his hardened member against Roxas's, earning another whimper.

Out of breath again, the two pulled away in unison. Axel pressed his forehead to Roxas's as he leveled his feet back to the ground. Placing one light kiss on the tip of his nose, he loosened his rough grip on the smaller.

"I think I love you, too."

Roxas opened his closed eyes, looking past his eyelashes and into Axel's barely opened eyes.

"No," Axel murmured quietly, smiling softly. "I know I do."

Despite the chill in the air and his previous thoughts, Roxas's face darkened to a cherry red and the warmth in his abdomen heated. They were still behind the school in the middle of a parking lot now. His mind wandered on the topic of he and Axel being together.

"Roxas." He was snapped from his thoughts. He hummed an acknowledging response. "Will you be mine?" Axel smiled hopefully, still a sadness lingered in his expression. He pushed all of his thoughts back; any doubt he held. He demolished it all with a confident nod.  
Axel's grin widened. A sincere smile that made Roxas join him in a joyful laugh. Axel pulled away softly and extended his hand for Roxas to take.

"Let's go back inside."

_And show everyone._ Roxas internally grinned wider at the thought of flaunting their relationship. He took Axel's hand in his and nodded. It was so sudden, and yet it felt too right to ignore.

* * *

Author Notes

Told you I'd do more 1P's. That'll be it for a while though. c:


	11. Deja Vu

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 11: Deja Vu

* * *

"Well, well, well." Namine devilishly grinned as the two boys sat beside her; it reminded him of the smile she held when Axel tricked him into eating the Paopu fruit.  
The chatter of everyone's rehearsal echoed in the background and ridiculous costumes were being passed out and around.

"Are you two a thing now?"

Roxas looked to Axel who nodded happily, answering for him.  
"I guess it was love at first sight, huh?" She caused Axel's smile to grow wider and it warmed Roxas's heart; he couldn't help but mimic the wide grin. The two twiddled their fingers around one another, rubbing the softness of Roxas's finger pads against Axel's calloused ones.

"Axel," Mr. Leon called out from the loudness in the room, motioning Axel to come. "We need some taller people to help put up these decorations, do you mind?"

Axel nodded but internally groaned.

"Don't worry, Axel, I'll keep your boyfriend safe." Namine attempted to wink but it looked like some kind of twitch that spiraled them all into a hysterical laughter.

"Don't get too comfortable." Axel playfully warned her.

"Don't talk to Juliet like that, for I love my Romeo." She dramatically put the back of her hand to her forehead and sighed.

Axel put a finger to his chin and narrowed his eyes before leaning on one knee to face the cross-legged blond. He tilted Roxas's chin and placed a teasingly soft kiss on the corner of his lips.  
"Well Romeo is actually gay and having hot sex with Tybalt." With a proper wink and a devilish smirk, he lifted himself again and met with Mr. Leon.

"Guess I'm indirectly kissing Axel, too." She looked to Roxas whose face seemed to be stuck in some kind of pout. Namine offered a smile when he turned to face her. "You know, Roxas," her smile faded slowly and her eyes averted to the redhead across the room, putting up decals and lights. "Axel really deserves someone good." She finally quietly spit out.

Roxas joined her gaze and nodded. "I think so too."

"That's good." She looked to him with a smile again. "I know you'll be good for him."

"I hope so." Roxas looked to his hands that were taken by Namine's small and gentle hands.

"I know so!" She beamed a reassuring smile that Roxas had no choice but to return.

He couldn't help but smile. The feeling of friendship and love was overwhelming; it was almost too much for his little heart to handle. He felt like he could burst any minute.

"So you coming to my place?" Axel plopped back down and playfully swat Namine's hand away to take Roxas's. He closed his fingers on Axel's hand and nodded.

"Good." Axel lifted his sweater sleeve barely to observe a metallic black watch. Looking past that, Roxas's heart tightened. A small patch of twisted white skin sat underneath the watch. Namine shot him a look that he caught in his peripheral as he quickly averted his gaze back to Axel's emerald eyes, joining his happiness with a forced smile. "We're going to head out then, I guess."

He tugged his sleeve back down and smiled to Namine who nodded.

"You ready, Roxas?"

Roxas nodded, watching Axel stand and extend a hand for Roxas to grab; to which he did and was pulled to his feet.

"Bye, Namine."

The two blonds waved to one another; Axel was eager to leave and pulled Roxas from the classroom.

"You two don't do anything bad now!"

They reached Axel's car quickly, jogging past the snowfall that was only getting heavier by the second. Short of breath, they panted inside the warmth of Axel's car that had been snowed in.

"I think we're stuck now." Axel chuckled and observed the snow starting to blanket the windshield.

Roxas lifted himself from the seat to look through the foggy glass. "We should have stayed inside." He pouted, hugging himself. Axel was already starting the engine and turning the heater on. Roxas waited until he dropped his hands back into his lap before crawling over into the driver's seat and straddling Axel's lap.

Axel blinked, obviously thrown off. "I'm cold." Roxas explained before nuzzling against the warmth radiating from Axel. The redhead wrapped his arms around the small of Roxas's waist, pulling him in closer, letting him take advantage of his eerie warmth.

"Mm…" Roxas exhaled, resting his head against Axel's shoulder.

"You gonna fall asleep on me?" Axel chuckled at Roxas's weary nod. "Fine by me." Axel lowered his voice almost to a whisper that only deepened Roxas's weariness.

.*+*+*.

_Sora, what happened to Roxas?_

"What do you mean?"

_He texted me to look up some guy a few days ago and now he's not answering my calls or texts. Is everything okay?_

Sora pressed his phone between his ear and shoulder, focusing on the water that was coming to a boil on the stove now. "Yeah, everything is okay. He's fine."

_Are you sure? This guy looked pretty dangerous…_

"Do you mean Axel?"

_Yeah, that was his name._

"Mh," Sora pondered for a moment. "No, I think he's pretty okay. Roxas seems to like him."

_But his records said he was a convict._

"Hayner, this is coming from you?"

Silence echoed on the other's line before Sora sighed. "Don't worry about Roxas. I'm taking care of him; everything is fine. Axel is fine."

_I dunno, Sora._

"I promise you. Oh," Sora paused for a moment. "I have another call, I'll call you back." He lied.

_Okay. Talk to you then._

"Uh huh." He ended the call, laying the phone beside the stove and proceeded to stir the softening noodles in his boiling water.

"Everything okay?" Riku leaned against the kitchen doorway; a small black lump still resided on his cheekbone. Sora nodded, offering a smile before the tallest leveled himself behind Sora, wrapping his arms around the thin waist. "I still can't believe you're older than me and you're so short."

Sora scoffed playfully, resting his hands over Riku's. "It's only by a year, don't feel so bad."

Riku smiled, placing a gentle kiss against the crook of Sora's neck.

"Is Roxas going to handle this okay?"

Sora arched a brow. "What? Us?"

Riku nodded, dropping his arms to his side to let Sora turn and face him with another smile. "Of course. Roxas can handle anything that's thrown at him." Sora paused, observing the still worried expression on Riku's face. "Besides, I think you two will eventually get along. I promised to accept Axel if he accepted you."

Riku's face twisted. "I don't know if I can accept Axel, Sora…"

"Riku…" Sora's eyes filled with plea. "Why do you hate him so much?"

He stepped back a few steps from the brunette, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't know. My sister just… I dunno. They used to mess around and she always got so upset that Axel didn't love her the way she loved him, I walked in on them one day and it wasn't that – I didn't hate him for that… I didn't like him, either, though. I hated him because he didn't stop until just maybe a year ago. They never fucked or anything… he just… played with her."

Sora sighed and nodded, not with understanding but acknowledgement. "Everyone makes mistakes, Riku. Don't you think Axel has suffered enough? Just let him be happy now."

Riku sighed again, unsure of what to say. He kept his eyes locked to the boiling water on the stove. Sora eventually accepted the hint and wrapped his arms around Riku's neck, weaving the silver locks through his fingers before softly kissing his lover. As reassuring as Sora could be, Riku wasn't certain he could accept Axel into his life again… but he felt for Sora. Trying was the least he could do.

.*+*+*.

"Rox…"

"Mm…" Roxas fisted the soft fabric of Axel's shirt, refusing to open his eyes. This sleep was too peaceful.

"Roxas, wake up." Axel sounded like a chain smoker again.

Roxas groaned softly, nuzzling against the older one's chest. "I don't want to."

The redhead laughed through his nose, sending vibrations against Roxas's cheek that only made him want to sleep even longer. Axel pet the blond spikes softly before prying him off and pressing his back against the steering wheel; causing a screeching honk that jolted them both into reality.

"Fuck!" Axel covered his mouth, his body shook from laughter as Roxas finally slumped into the passenger seat. He pouted, defeated. He looked over to Roxas's grumpy face and laughed harder, apologizing for it. "Don't worry, we'll be home soon and you can sleep again."

Roxas groaned in response, pulling his phone from his pocket – remembering he had woken up a few times from the vibrations but never checked the messages. One was from Hayner and another was from Sora.

_Hayner__  
__talked 2 sora thx a lot for keeping me updated asshole i thought u were dead_

Roxas scoffed, moving onto Sora's message.

_Sora__  
__riku is spending the night, u comin home tonight?_

He quickly began writing out a text explaining he'll be staying the night with Axel. He hardly noticed that Axel wasn't even in the car until he felt the weight shifting at the redhead sitting back into his seat.

"Well, I might need a new battery tomorrow but the snow seems to have melted down enough for us to make it back to my place."

Roxas nodded, watching Axel close the door and start up the car. The drive alone was enough to send him back into his former trance and he dozed off until Axel had to wake him again.

"I'd love to carry you but I think I'd get us both killed." Axel grinned before slipping out of the car. Roxas followed closely behind him in the dark of the night; hand in hand. Once inside, they stripped of their jackets and shoes before seating where they always do. Roccia was happily mewing as Axel fed him after so long.

Axel seated beside Roxas, stretching an arm to bring the blond into his lap, watching as Roxas manually straddled him. The redhead arched a brow and smirked. "I'm getting used to this sight." Axel's hands wandered, cupping the blond's ass through his jeans. Roxas's face ignited, hiding it with a kiss. With a squeeze, Roxas let out a small gasp that Axel took advantage of, sliding his tongue through the soft lips quickly. Roxas dug his nails into his shoulders, accepting the warm tongue playing with his. He leaned forward, applying more pressure and deepening the kiss.

Roxas whimpered against the hungry lips, grinding his swollen member against Axel's and earning a throaty groan against his own lips.

Axel pulled away, his cat-like eyes flashing Roxas a lustful look before his neck was attacked. The oldest clamped his teeth down painfully hard against the soft flesh and Roxas nearly screamed in response. The following whimpers proved that he wasn't going to fight him off though. With that in mind, Axel held his bite for only a few more moments before retreating to place kisses around the swollen skin.

Roxas shuddered, his eyes rolled back as he leaned his head back. Never had he realized how sensitive his neck was and Axel was finding all of the right spots to tease. He could feel their erections pressing tightly together, throbbing and swollen. It was painful; and he realized then how badly he wanted Axel.

He squeezed his eyes shut, all his senses coming back into play. "No..." He pushed himself from Axel's grip, almost slipping out of the boney lap completely if it weren't for Axel's quick reflexes. "Stop…"

Axel immediately halted; his breath hitching. "What's wrong?"

Roxas bit his lip, fidgeting out of Axel's lap and back onto the cushion beside him. "I just…" He averted his gaze before huddling closer to himself, hugging his knees.

"Just not ready?" Axel finished for him and Roxas nodded nervously.

He expected a worse response, so his heart skipped a beat when Axel smiled and pulled him into an embrace. "That's fine, Roxas." He placed a kiss on the top of Roxas's head.

"Really?" Roxas gazed at the redhead from the corner of his eyes.

"Mhm." He pulled the fragile blond in closer. "But… I'm tired and I'd really like to sleep in my bed this time." A contagious smile played on Axel's face as the blond returned the smile with a nod.

"I promise I won't do anything, either." He reassured Roxas before leading him to the bedroom. Quickly kicking a small whiskey bottle out of view; under the bed, he pulled Roxas to the other side of the room where the large bed laid.

It was a simple room, it looked like the livingroom, really. White walls, white carpet, white bed. Boring; but it was wonderful to Roxas. Sleeping with his boyfriend, being alone with him. It was all so new to him.

He watched Axel peel his sweater off. The first time he had seen the redhead shirtless. His heart tugged into his throat, seeing the large scars dotting across Axel's defined back. His forearms were a blend of irritated pink and white. The only light source was the moon light emitting from the small window; but Roxas could see clearly enough that the ones on his arm were self-harm scars. The ones on his back seemed like a tale for another day. It took every fiber Roxas had not to reach out and beg for the story of every single scar. He pretended not to notice while Axel crawled into the bed and slipped between the sheets before extending his arms out for Roxas who took no time in accepting the invitation.

He adjusted with Axel, placing his knee between the taller figure's legs and resting his head on Axel's extended arm. He nuzzled closely to the warmth as Axel softly stroked Roxas's side.

"Axel?" Roxas looked up to the redhead's closed eyes.

"Mm?" Axel peeked his eyes open, smiling wearily at the golden hair reflecting in the mild moonlight.

"I love you."

Their gazes locked, Axel's smile curving more. "I love you too."


	12. Outsiders

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 12: Outsiders

* * *

_I'm just going to lose him._

_Axel, you can't think like that._

_I'm going to lose him._

_Well that bottle isn't Roxas._

_I guess it's not._

_So let it go._

_I can't._

_Then you__will__lose him._

.*+*+*.

_Bzzt._

"Mm…"

_Bzzt._

Roxas pawed his eyes and rolled over.

_Bzzt._

"Rox, answer your phone…"

_Bzzt._

"No…"

_Bzzt._

Axel groaned and stretched over Roxas, taking the phone to his own ear. "Hello?"

Roxas finally peeled his eyes open, looking up at the shirtless redhead. His smoker voice was back and his eyes were closed and his hair looked like a wild lion's mane.

"Rox, it's Sora." He shoved the phone against the blonde's chest. Roxas weakly scooped the phone in his hands, slapping it to the side of his face.

"Hey." His voice groggy.

_Roxas, the house was set on fire!_

Roxas immediately shot up. "What?! Are you okay?"

Sora's gasps into the phone turned into breathless chuckles.

"You asshole, that's not funny!"

_But I woke you up._

"Still."

_Come on, let's go out._

"Where?" Roxas slipped out of bed, his legs suffocated from wearing his jeans all night.

_I'unno – the beach._

"It's freezing outside."

_It'll be 80 degrees today._

"And you want to swim?"

_No, you moron. Let's go out and picnic or something._

Roxas pulled the phone away to look at the time. "It's 5 in the morning."

_So? Let's go!_

He sighed. "Riku will be there, won't he?"

A silence fell before Sora stuttered.

_U-um, yeah. I mean…_

"I don't think this is as good of a plan as you think."

_C'mon, Roxas. I really like Riku._

Roxas sighed. "I know you do, but…"

_Let's just… try. Please? For me?_

He could practically see Sora's big blue eyes glistening with fake tears.

"Ugh." He looked back to Axel who watched him with an unreadable expression. "Fine."

_Yeah! I'll be there in 15 to pick you guys up!_

Roxas groaned an affirmative noise into the receiver before ending the call.

"Axel," Roxas sat his phone back down and stepped closer to the redhead who sat on the edge of the bed, waiting. "It looks like we're going to the beach."

"And Riku will be there." Axel stated more than asked. Roxas nodded, biting his bottom lip. The lanky figure sighed, running a hand through his grimy spikes. "Whatever makes you happy, Roxie." He looked up with a smile. "I just want you to be happy."

.*+*+*.

Hand in hand, Axel and Roxas made their way from the apartment – that Roxas had no choice but to set on the phone with Sora for 15 minutes listening to Riku telling him which ways to go. It pissed him off, knowing that Riku knew where Axel lived. He pushed it back, though. For Sora.

They got into Sora's small red Honda Fit – the ugliest car anyone had ever seen. It looked like a bleeding hunchback lizard.

Riku sat in the passenger seat and Roxas sat behind him, watching Riku watch Axel with a hostile glare. The car hung with silence until Sora exclaimed his plans happily. Thankfully Riku turned his attention to the brunette and Sora drove them to the beach, hand in hand with Riku. Axel sat quietly, keeping his hands to himself and his eyes locked to the nearest window.

Roxas droned out Riku and Sora's chatter, trying to find some way to ease his churning stomach with the blurred bystanders. He could have extended his hand and held Axel's; he could have reassured the redhead. But right now he needed his own peace of mind.

"Here we are!" Sora had to yell everything.

Roxas flinched as his thoughts were viciously ripped away. He looked to Axel who held the same expression. He wondered what he could have been thinking about.

Sora and Riku got out of the car before Riku opened the door for Roxas, Sora opening the one for Axel. Looking up at the silver headed boy he could see all the raw and bruised flesh on the soft of his neck – probably from Sora. He pushed the remembering thought of Sora on top of him back and replaced it with the fist he took to his face.

Stepping out, Riku shut the door behind him. Everything he did was intimidating Roxas; but he breathed. He looked to Axel for some reassurance and Sora for control.

Sora hooked an arm around Roxas's shoulder. "Isn't it nice? I stumbled across it the other day while you were at school."

"Yeah," Roxas looked out to the boarded dock that rested in a crisp and calm ocean. There were no waves, but some of the water had iced over. Despite that, the sun still shone down brutally and warm. Not warm enough to take off their jackets, but it was a change. There was hardly any snow in the sand and the trees actually looked alive here. But it wasn't home; and Riku was here. "It's great."

"I used to come here when I was a kid." Riku chimed in, kicking some of the sand around and looking out to the still-rising sun. "Kairi and I came here together."

Again, more jealousy.

Sora left Roxas to hold onto Riku's hand, pulling him closer to shore. "Come on you guys!"

Roxas looked up to Axel who seemed spaced out more than ever. He gently took the pale hand into his, causing Axel's stunned reaction. Nudging the redhead forward with a smile, they followed the couple towards the shore.

The waves licked the ice, melting it and forming it in odd shapes and sharp daggers. It was dangerous to walk along the shore, but as long as Axel was there he felt untouchable.

"Are you okay?"

Sora and Riku's giggling in the background was ebbed out again and he turned all his focus to Axel. He smiled to the blond, reassuringly and nodded. Clearly fake.

"Don't lie to me, Axel."

He sighed and shook his head, fake smile still painted. "I'm okay. I just," he paused, his face twisting in a sour expression. His eyes still looked sad none the less. "I'm okay." He repeated. His eyes seemed to be begging Roxas to drop it, even though he wasn't locking gazes.

"Okay." Roxas did so, receiving a precious smile that broke his heart and took his breath.

"Roxas!"

He spun on his heels, internally cursing himself and Sora. The brunette was waving bagged sandwiches around, a small blue cooler sitting at his feet on top of a blanket. "Let's eat!"

He waved in acknowledgment before turning back to Axel. "Are you… going to, you know. _Be_ okay?"

He nodded stubbornly again. He sighed, doubting that.

.*+*+*.

"So, Roxas." The four boys huddled against the – luckily, large blanket. Riku faced Roxas now though, ignoring Axel the entire time. "How are you and Axel?"

Third person conversations – how classy.

Roxas's head laid in Axel's lap and the couple shooting one another a look in unison. "We're fine." Roxas spat out quietly. A silver brow rose but he left the subject alone. For the first time, Roxas had seen Axel _scowl_. His lips actually curled, a canine tooth shown and his eyes darkened. Even though it wasn't directed towards him, he cowered and turned over to face away from Axel; rather looking to Sora now.

The cousins shared a worried look before Sora stuttered. "H-hey, it's getting kind of cold, why don't we head back?"

Roxas frantically nodded, a sigh of relief escaping his lips when Axel lowered his head and his soft expression returned. Sora and Riku folded the blanket while Axel and Roxas placed everything back into the trunk. Every piled into the car, except Sora and Roxas.

"Really went great." Roxas sarcastically sneered.

Sora sighed, throwing his hands out to his side. "I _tried_."

"Whatever. We shouldn't leave them in the car alone." With that, Roxas passed Sora and got into his seat, meeting Axel's relieved gaze. Sora did the same, getting into the driver's seat and revving up the engine.

Once they pulled up to Axel's apartment, Roxas started getting out only to be stopped by Axel.

"What's wrong?" His hand was still on his seatbelt when Axel started getting out of the car.

"I just want to be alone. Text me, okay?"

With that, the car door was slammed and Roxas watched the red spikes bobbing while he walked up the stairs, disappearing behind the 13th door.

.*+*+*.

"Xion?" Axel shut the door behind him, already seeing the small girl curled up on his couch. Her head lifted at his voice. "What are you doing here?"

He stepped closer, crossing his arms once he came to face her. She sat up but made no move to stand.

She shrugged, her eyes glued to the floor.

"That's not an answer."

Again, she shrugged, turning her head. He sighed, frustrated, before slumping into the chair across from her; the way he had always sat when Roxas sat in her seat.

"Good thing I didn't bring Roxas up here." He glared at her, a hint of anger seething.

Her eyes widened, finally connecting. "So you're really with Roxas now?"

He nodded, resting his elbow on the arm of the chair and leaning his chin against his knuckles.

"That's good. I'm happy for you." She lied.

"What are you doing here?" Repeating the question for a third time, he finally got an answer. Xion lifted a small whiskey bottle in her hands. Empty.

"You've been drinking again." She noted. "I thought Roxas made you happy."

Red brows raised. "So you automatically assume he doesn't make me happy because I have a drink?"

Another shrug as she sat the bottle on the coffee table. "That's one of many I found under your bed."

"Why were you going through my things?"

She pulled a small tissue from her jacket pocket now. Unwrapping it revealed a thin razor blade; dry blood still clung to the edges. She sat it beside the bottle, returning her gaze to Axel's broken one.

"You're going to kill yourself, Axel." She rose, baby stepping closer until she fell softly into his lap. He kept his head turned and knuckles pressed to his lips. "Why are you doing this?"

She didn't wait for an answer before she grabbed his unoccupied arm. He didn't fight her when she rolled up his sleeve and removed the rubber bracelets and bangles. Exhaling, she traced gentle over the deep gashes in his inner forearm.

"Axel…" she placed a hand to his cheek, turning his face to look at her. His eyes finally met hers again but showed no sign of cooperation. "What are you going to do when you cut too deep?"

He hissed, ripping his arm back and pulling his sleeve down. He stood, forcefully shoving her off. She stumbled back, catching herself on the arm of the couch.

"Die – I would assume."

"What about everyone else? Don't you care?"

"No." He bluntly stated, his cold glare penetrated her sympathy.

"What about Roxas, then?"

"What about him?"

"You'll just leave him behind?"

"I'll just leave him before he leaves me."

She knitted her brows and shook her head. "What do you mean?"

"I'm just going to lose him."

"Axel, you can't think like that."

"I'm going to lose him." He repeated, his voice raised.

"Well that bottle isn't Roxas." She pointed to the empty whiskey bottle.

"I guess it's not."

"So let it go."

"I _can't_."

"Then you _will_ lose him."

He sighed, finally sitting back down. He ran his fingers through his spikes before pursing his lips.

"What's it going to be Axel?"

.*+*+*.

"Rox, you feeling okay?" Sora waved to Riku one last time, starting the engine again as Roxas slid into the passenger seat. "Is Axel okay?"

Roxas shrugged, putting his seatbelt on.

"I'm sorry." Sora spat out, locking his eyes to the road as they accelerated.

"It's not your fault. You were just trying to help."

"I did a pretty crummy job."

Roxas laughed quietly. "You still tried. You did more than I could."

Sora sighed, glancing to the spaced out blond. "Did you text him?"

"No…" Roxas bit his lip. "He has…" He looked to Sora, unsure of how much he should say. Sora was still getting used to Axel – and he accepted him enough. He didn't need to go on about the scars he saw. "A lot to do." He finished, covering it up.

Sora nodded. "Oh. Alright."

"I don't want to go home." Roxas held his twisting stomach and looked desperately to his cousin.

"Do you want to go out?"

Roxas nodded, his lip curling.

"Don't get sick in the car, at least. Do you need me to pull over?"

Again, Roxas nodded; barely making it out of the car before emptying his stomach on the side of the road. Sora quickly got out and circled the car until he met Roxas. He brushed his blond spikes back and rubbed his back softly. Once Roxas felt he was done Sora helped him lie down in the backseat.

"Let's go to Riku's." Sora offered quietly. Not even giving Roxas a second to protest, he turned the car back around and drove towards his lover's house again.

Roxas's chin quivered while he hid his face into the crook of his arm. The last person he needed to see right now was Riku. He wanted to go home. He needed Olette, Hayner and Pence – the clock tower and sea salt ice cream. Right now he didn't want Axel, Namine, Kairi, Aqua – none of them.

"I want to go home." He whimpered through his clamped teeth loud enough for Sora to hear, and loud enough for Sora's tears to fall from his own eyes.


	13. Thirteenth Door

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 13: Thirteenth Door

* * *

"How about we buy a ticket to Twilight Town?" Riku lifted Roxas's chin with an unusual smirk across his face; reason enough for Roxas to snap his head away from the touch. Sora watched the gesture from the other side of the room with wide eyes.

"Don't touch me." Roxas scowled, pressing himself deeper into the leather sofa. Aqua interrupted the two, sitting between them instead of beside Sora. Everyone questioned why Riku sat next to Roxas in the first place, but no one dared to ask it out loud.

"Besides," Roxas spoke with venom. "Axel promised to take me already."

Riku got up, plopping next to Sora and sighed when he was denied the privilege to wrap his arm around his boyfriend. "Axel makes a lot of promises – doesn't he Aqua?"

Roxas knitted his brows at the comment, looking from Riku to Aqua and waiting for an answer.

"Piss off, Riku." She broke her gaze with Roxas.

"No, let's tell the whole story."

"Are you drunk?" Sora shot up from the sofa, his brows turned inwards and a snarl that Roxas had never seen painted his face. "You have _got_ to be fucking drunk." The comment caught everyone off guard, especially Riku who stared at the brunette dumbfoundedly. "Or do you just have that much of a problem with Roxas?" Sora bowed over the sitting silver headed boy. "Well?"

The room fell silent, everyone's eyes were on Riku but they awaited Sora's pounce.

"You should go." Riku finally narrowed his eyes, glaring to the short brunette. He rose from his seat, now much taller than Sora and he mirrored the stance. Roxas shot up and nudged between the two, shoving Sora back gently enough to break up whatever tension was about to snap.

A familiar feeling engulfed him – the pinpoint of pain that came with a fist to the face. But Riku wouldn't have hit him, right? He had to be imagining this.

The screams and hands on him said otherwise though. The sudden blanket of eternal black that inked his vision and sent him flying to the wooden floor finalized what was happening in his mind.

.*+*+*.

"I'll leave him." Axel tugged the locks of his hair, tears falling helplessly. "I can't bring him into all of this – why did I even do this in the first place? I'm so terrible."

Xion dared to place a hand on his shoulder, thankful he didn't dispose of the touch. "Roxas understands you, why would you want to leave that behind?"

He shook his head. "I don't, but I can't change."

"Roxas can change you."

"He doesn't know me." He sniffled, rubbing his eyes roughly. "He doesn't need to know me."

"You can't just get rid of him." She kneeled beside the lanky figure, lifting his chin to look into his bloodshot eyes. "He said he loves you, Axel."

Jerking his head away, he stood and turned his back to her. "So did you."

Her heart caught in mid-beat. "I did love you."

"And I ran you off."

"N-no…" She extended a small hand, reaching to hold Axel's in hers. "I never stopped –"

She snapped her hand away at the abrupt ringing and Axel immediately reached for the phone.

"It's Roxas." He stated before looking to her sad eyes. Sighing, he looked back to the incoming call. A picture of Roxas sleeping peacefully sat on the screen – a picture he couldn't go without taking. A small smile crept to his lips and his thumb moved from the 'end' button. He answered it.

"Ye-"

_Axel?!_

"R-Roxas?"

_No, it's Sora! There's – we – Riku hit – oh my God…_

"What's going on? Calm down."

_Can you come pick us up? Please!_

"Yeah, where are you? What happened to your car?"

_We're at Riku's – I can't explain right now. Please hurry._

A small thread twisted around his heart and it felt as if it sliced into two. "I'll be there." He stated confidently before ending the hall – rushing past Xion and grabbing his keys.

"Axel, wait –"

"I can't, let yourself out. I have to go." He turned around, holding the doorknob in your hands. His voice was hostile and he pointed a threatening finger in her direction. "And I mean it. Get out. I don't want to see you here when I get back."

* * *

AN  
To clear up the last two chapters: Roxas is homesick – emphasis on the sick part. It's been eating at him this whole time and now it's taking a toll on his body. Plus all the drama he's been dealing with is just making him sicker. I was going to better explain it in the next chapter but a few of you have asked. Also, Axel didn't dump Roxas – but he considered it while talking to Xion. Sorry for being confusing. x -x


	14. Monster I Am

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 14: Monster I Am

* * *

Riku's punch had hurt the worst out of anytime Roxas had ever been hit, and Roxas had only been punched by two people in his entire life; his father, numerous times, and Sora – once and over which one of them was going to kiss Olette first. Sora had won of course, but Roxas didn't go down without a fight.

He smiled at the thought, despite his aching mouth.

"What're you smiling at?" Sora looked down at the squatting blond while pawing the tears out of his eyes.

"Just remembering that one time," Roxas attempted to cheer his cousin up, "that I beat your ass over Olette." He smirked at his cousin's sudden laughter.

"You so didn't." He lowered himself and sat cross-legged beside the blond. "If I remember right, I'm the one who broke your nose and sent you to the hospital – _crying_."

Roxas grinned, giggles slipping from somewhere deep inside him. "No, your memory's altered."

"Oh, sure." He nudged Roxas playfully before his face fell slowly. "I'm sorry, you know."

"For what?"

Sora extended his hand to observe the puffy red flesh underneath Roxas's eye. "I shouldn't have lost it like that. If I didn't, then you wouldn't have gotten hurt."

Roxas shrugged and turned his face. "It's not your fault."

Brunette brows furrowed. "It is, I should have seen how much of an ass Riku was earlier."

"S'okay." He offered a reassuring smile to Sora who obviously wasn't buying it, but remained silent about the topic until the familiar red Porsche pulled up beside them, a redhead withdrawing shortly afterwards.

"Axel!" Sora rose and immediately started spitting out the entire situation.

Axel had taken Roxas into his arms already, turning his face and observing the irritated skin with a vengeful frown on his face. When he tried to shoo Axel's hands away his grip only tightened and it was more than obvious he was pissed.

_Maybe waiting in front of Riku's house wasn't a good idea_, Roxas thought – last minute. Because as soon as Axel was done inspecting Roxas, he immediately pushed past the two, marching directly for the door.

He didn't even knock; he barged in and let the door slam to the wall. Roxas and Sora immediately started pacing towards the scene but Axel had already pinned Riku to the floor, yelling in his face.

"_I never realized how badly I wanted to kill you until now_!" Axel sneered before leaning upwards, straddling Riku. He lifted his fist and the last thing Roxas heard was the sound of bone hitting bone.

Then the ringing started again. But it was different. No one was making an effort to stop Axel – not even Aqua. They all just watched it happening; punch after punch after punch until Axel rose and kicked him square in the ribs and face; finishing it off with a hard stomp to the stomach that left Riku coughing up the loose blood in his mouth – and blood was everywhere. It happened so fast that Roxas didn't even know someone could bleed so much in just a minute.

"Let's go." Axel stated firmly before gripping the two boys by their forearms and dragging them out to the car. Roxas turned back and saw Aqua waving in the doorway.

_Did she seriously not care that Axel just beat the Hell out of her brother?_

Roxas shrugged to himself as they all piled into the car. Not a word was said as they pulled up to the Strife house. Axel gripped the steering wheel as if he waited for the two to just get out.

"Axel," Roxas tugged at the black sweater sleeve and watched his jawline tense. Axel being pissed was truly a scary sight. "Why don't you come in and have dinner with us?"

"No, I just want to go home."

"Ax, please –"

"You two wanted me to pick you up," he interrupted Roxas's request. "And I did – so just get out."

Sora sat in the cramped back, watching the two fall into a silence. Roxas dropped his hand and without saying another word, stepped out of the car before pulling the seat up and letting Sora out.

Roxas half expected this to be like some cheesy movie where the guy gets out and apologizes, kisses the other goodnight and they end up fucking in the backseat of his car – but that hope burnt up when Axel sped off without even looking his way.

"C'mon." Sora requested sadly, taking Roxas's hand in his.

"Roxas, Sora – I thought I heard you two." Cloud peeked out of the front door, looking off to the fading taillights down the street. "Where's your friend going?"

Sora shook his head, giving Cloud 'the look' that Roxas wasn't okay and made his way past him with the small blond in his arms. Cloud followed behind them and once light fully hit Roxas's face is when the whole thing finally turned to shit.

He snatched Roxas's face, forcing him to look him in the eye. "Who hit you?" Keeping Roxas's chin between his fingers, he turned to Sora and narrowed his eyes. "Who hit him?"

Sora sighed, shuffling his feet before admitting it was Riku.

"Don't you let that bastard back in our house," he released Roxas's face and pointed a lecturing finger to Sora. "I mean it; I'll _kill him_ if I see him again."

The brunette shook his head understandably. "I don't even want to see him again."

"Go help him clean up then come and eat dinner." His voice was still hostile and he looked just as intimidating even when he slipped his apron back on. The two nodded before turning down the hallway.

.*+*+*.

Axel sighed a relieved breath when he found his home empty but the lingering guilt in his chest made him wish there could be someone here for him to beat the shit out of. Riku – he hadn't done enough damage.

He sighed again, this time with aggravation. He pulled out his phone, staring at the picture he had taken of Roxas. Pressing it to his forehead, he growled to himself. The house was lonely, even with Roccia.

Biting his lip, he flipped through his contacts. The thought of deleting numerous contacts he never talked to, or messaging one of them. Instead he found Roxas's name. He smirked at the thought running through his mind and spilling out as a text. He didn't take Roxas as a deviant, but what would it hurt to see?

_Meet me at the curb at midnight._

* * *

Author Notes

My fiancé and I broke up on the 9th and I'm really uh… setback. I don't know how well this chapter is but I promised you guys I would have it updated. If I'm late on the next chapter please don't hold it against me. I'm sorry. He introduced me to Kingdom Hearts and writing a love story ABOUT kh is agonizing to my heart. I can't think very well. I hope you all understand.

Anyway, how long did you guys wait for Axel to finally beat Riku? I was so eager in uploading their fight but it was kind of ruined with the chain of events happening and I got distracted. I did go back and edit this some, I'll go back again sooner or later.


	15. My Sweetheart Was A Gambler

***Drug use & yaoi warning.**

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 15: My Sweetheart Was A Gambler

* * *

_Meet me at the curb at midnight._

Roxas squinted his sore eyes at the text, checking the name – then the text over and over. It was from Axel and it was definably strange. Despite wanting to question the redhead on why the sudden change of attitude, he sat his phone back down and did as told. It was 20 until midnight and he was already late on reading the text.

He crept through the dark hallway, peeking into Clouds' room and then Soras' – both were fast asleep. With that in mind he returned to his room and locked the door before slipping out of his window, only phone in hand. He placed a nearby twig in between his windowsill before gently closing it; only leaving a crack big enough for him to get back through.

Glancing at his phone, he had 10 minutes until Axel would show up. He jogged through the darkness, snow crunching underneath his feet as he occasionally spun around to look back to his home. Axel was turning him into a true rebel. He had never snuck out like this before.

He hugged his sweater to himself as his jog came to an unsuspecting walk. A group of teenagers huddled across the street from where he waited now. His pulse throbbed quicker, noticing one of the hooded figures pointing towards him, one of the others laughing and another one stared at him – not saying a word.

Pulling out his phone, he looked down at the bright screen. Only 7 minutes – 7 long and life threatening minutes. He fidgeted, rubbing his knees together and fumbling his phone between his hands. To his relief bright headlights blinded him; his heart thumping faster at the realization that it was Axel.

_Thank God_, he thought before the slim red car had pulled up beside him.

"What are we doing over here," one of the taller hooded figures crossed the street. "Making a drug deal?" He removed his hood, an illuminating smirk peeling across the tanned face.

The person no longer appeared to be a teenager, especially with his deep voice; it was obvious to tell he was a grown man. His hair was ginger, messy and looked like weeds. The only neat hair was the hair that trailed down his jawline.

"No," Axel rolled his window down fully as the stranger leaned against the driver seat window. "So get off my car, yeah?"

"Oh –" the man backed away with a smug look to his smile. "Axel, what a _nice_ surprise." He cooed.

"Yeah, whatever. Shame_ I_ don't know _you_." He stated with a bored tone before motioning Roxas to get into the car, which he did without a second to spare. Once his window was rolled up and the stranger stepped away Axel sped off – the speed jerked Roxas back and painfully slammed him again the car.

"Did you really not know him?" Roxas wrapped his fingers around his throbbing neck.

"No." Axel kept his eyes to the road, his voice still just as hostile.

"Oookay..." Roxas looked to the dark floorboard where he was slipping off his shoes.

Axel glanced to his gesture with a small smile. "Tired?"

Roxas nodded and leaned over to flip the heater on before hugging his oversized sweater to himself again, curling into the leather seat. Axel gave him a strange look, a grin playing on his face.

"You're getting comfortable around me."

Again, Roxas nodded before pressing his feet to the glove box and closing his eyes.

"I'm glad." Axel's attitude had changed for the better, a smile even crossed Roxas's face.

The redhead has noticed, just barely. "I'm sorry for earlier."

"For what?" The blond head lifted just enough to look at Axel from the corner of his eyes.

"Being snappy. I was an asshole."

"S'okay." Roxas smiled, laying his hand gently over Axel's and letting their entwined hands fall between them.

Axel opened his mouth to speak but glanced over to the hunching blond. His lips were puckered lazily and his eyes were closed, the sounds of soft snoring emitting just barely. If he weren't driving he surely would have joined him, but instead; he smiled to himself.

.*+*+*.

Sora sighed, rolling over again and listened to the faint fumbling of his cousin's window opening and then closing. Roxas was so terrible at sneaking out it wasn't even funny. He wouldn't snitch on him, but he was lucky Cloud was a heavy sleeper or else he'd be in a lot of shit.

Another sigh before turning over again, this time grabbing his neglected phone on his nightstand.

14 new messages – all from Riku and all assorted in 'I'm sorry', or 'What's your problem?' or Sora's favorite – 'Can't you at least let Roxas fight his own fights?'

If Sora wasn't about keeping peace he would have given Riku nothing short of an earful, but his heart ached too badly and now he was agreeing more than ever about going back to Twilight Town.

With a final sigh and groan, he turned onto his stomach and smothered his face into the plush pillow, slipping his phone underneath and forcing himself to keep from checking it.

.*+*+*.

"Hey," Axel offered Roxas a smile, watching the blond peel his eyes open and blink rapidly. "You fell asleep in the car, so I carried you up. So… good morning." He chuckled quietly.

Roxas brought his hand up to his face, fingering his eyelids wide open. "Shit."

Axel sipped at his coffee, mumbling a questionable noise.

"My head hurts…"

He smiled against his coffee cup before slowly walking to sit across from Roxas as usual. Setting his cup down he finally exhaled, watching Roxas rub his temples and hunch over to rub the nape of his neck.

"Like I said, you slept in a car."

"I can tell." Roxas spit out before lying on his side, legs dangling off the couch.

Axel sighed before raising and crossing the coffee table between them to sit on the edge of the couch, bringing Roxas to set back upright and lean on his bare chest. Wrapping his arms around the small of Roxas's waist, he kissed the shell of his ear gently, a smirk spreading across his face.

"I know what will make you feel better." Axel suggested in a low tone, a quiet chuckle following.

Roxas didn't like the sound of that but before he had a chance to protest, Axel's arms were tightening around him, bringing him closer until not even a piece of dust could find a way between their bodies.

Strained a bit for breath and startled, Roxas remained silent, not fighting when Axel's hands guided up his collarbones and his fingers wrapped around his throat. If anything he tilted his head back to allow better access or to keep himself from being choked.

Axels free hand fidgeted around somewhere between the couch cushions before returning, a small white square between his index and thumb pads. He brought it to eyelevel with Roxas; it wasn't a pill but it looked like one; purely white like a rip of paper.

"Trust me?" Axel whispered quietly against the back of Roxas's ear. He earned another chuckle when Roxas nodded quickly, obviously flustered and scared with the current position.

_Good_, Axel thought – getting a rise from Roxas is _exactly_ what he wanted.

Axel placed the small sheet against Roxas's lips, as he parted them he slid it between the softness. It was bitter but sweet and it dissolved awkwardly against his tongue. He choked a bit on it, coughing barely at the strange numbness in his throat. It was more than obvious it was a drug, a pill or _something_ – Roxas couldn't put his finger on it, but the overwhelming sensation of nothingness that overcame him gave him the proper impression and he suddenly didn't care what it was.

Axel tightened his grasp, not hard enough to choke Roxas but hard enough to send that electric fear through his body, the one that would make him question himself; '_why does this feel good?' 'why am I getting __**hard**__?' 'why do I like this?'_

He smirked as that was exactly what he had gotten. Roxas exhaled a long and quiet breath, finally relaxing against Axel's chest. Taking the opportunity, Axel let go of Roxas's neck only to grab the stereo remote.

Roxas jumped a bit at the sudden chimes in earshot, (_*House of the Rising Sun by Lauren O'Connell_) a female singing followed by the sound of a soft and slow drums and a lazy guitar strumming,– the feeling of nothing, numbness and carelessness heightened – and that's what Axel wanted.

_There is a house in New Orleans they call the rising sun,_  
_And it's been the ruin of many a poor girl and me, oh God, I'm one._

The redhead lowered his hands down Roxas's exposed chest – Roxas taken aback at the sudden feeling.

_When did you take my shirt off?_ – is what he wanted to ask, but the words came out as a throaty whimper as the warm hands scanned across his skin, arms wrapping around him and squeezing – so _**warm**_ against his cold body.

_My mother was a tailor, she sowed these new blue jeans_  
_My sweetheart was a gambler, Lord, down in New Orleans._

Axel kissed the faint bruising on Roxas's nape; the bruises that Riku had left. He neverminded the anger that sizzled and focused on Roxas, moving the blond hair away from the crook of his neck before sinking his teeth into the soft flesh. Roxas only rolled his head to the side; unaware of how painful this would have really been and more focused on Axel's hands working their way into his loose sweatpants.

_Now the only thing a gambler needs is a suitcase and a trunk,_  
_And the only time when he's satisfied is when he's on a drunk._

His pupils widened and hollowed as they rolled back; the relief of his erection coming free sent his dizziness to another level. He arched his back, unwarily grinding against Axel's own clothed hardness. The redhead groaned through clenched teeth, unexpectedly earning a wry smile from Roxas.

"See what you do to me?" Axel cooed quietly against the swollen skin of Roxas's neck before gliding his fingertips over the weeping flesh in front of him. "See what I do to you?"

_He fills his glasses up to the brim and he'll pass the cards around,_  
_And the only pleasure he gets out of life is rambling from town to town._

Roxas nodded; a feathery laugh following, letting his head fall onto Axel's shoulder as he wrapped his fingers around Roxas's erection, squeezing lightly and smirking when the blonde's essence dripped onto his fingers. He used it to his advantage, eager to hear those honey like moans that he had heard in the car before. This is where he wanted Roxas for so long, touching him like this, making him feel like this.

_Oh tell my baby sister not to do what I have done,_  
_But shun that house in New Orleans they call the rising sun._

While he gathered the wetness between his fingers he only earned more, more than enough to begin pumping the blonde's member. He did so, slowly at first but speeding up as Roxas's soft moans turned into strained groans – until it was nothing but gasping, quick intakes of air. His hips jerked along with Axel's movements in attempts to meet every pump and his small hands were clenched tightly on Axel's shoulder's, bending his arms behind him just to claw at the redhead's exposed torso.

_Well with one foot on the platform and the other foot on the train_  
_I'm going back to New Orleans to wear that ball and chain._

He didn't mind, he only growled into the blond hair, keeping a steady rhythm even if it was uncoordinated. He didn't mind when he could see the blood in Roxas's nails, when he could feel the wetness dripping down his back and he didn't mind when Roxas was practically **screaming** his name, begging _'please, please, please'_ in mantras – he didn't care if the neighbors heard. He only wanted Roxas to feel good, the best he's ever felt.

"_A-Axel – Axel – ahh_…!"

_Oh fuck_, Axel bit his bottom lip, his brows furrowed at the chills sent up his spine at how fucking sexy Roxas sounded – so winded and exhausted, but so desperate and heated. His own groin ached painfully, unlike never before and it ground awkwardly against his zipper – but it was fine, as long as Roxas felt better. He deserved it, something, for all Axel had gotten him in to.

_I'm going back to New Orleans, my race is almost run,_  
_I'm going back to end my life down in the rising sun._

"I'm – I'm _gonna_…" Again, the feathery voice echoed past the blaring music, right into Axel's ear and tickling his jawline. He used his free hand to turn Roxas's head around, adjusting his body to level him out comfortably as he sunk his lips into Roxas's parted lips.

Roxas dug his heels into the cushions, his head leaned back to accept the tongue wildly exploring his mouth. The blond was practically screaming, yelling and wailing into their kiss, his uneven breathing ghosted over Axel's cheek. It was agonizing not to touch himself, but it was even better to touch Roxas. The frail hips jerked upwards one last time before the warm essence had sprayed; and he didn't mind even when it had gotten onto his face, only disappointed he had to close his eyes to avoid getting shot in the eye.

_There is a house in New Orleans they call the rising sun_  
_And it's been the ruin of many a poor girl and me, oh God, I'm one._

When Roxas's moaning had stopped, and Axel could feel his member steady and stop twitching, he opening his eyes to see all of Roxas's juices over them; on Roxas's face and chest, on Axel's chest and face. He smirked to himself, obviously succeeding in making Roxas feel utterly amazing.

He looked down and into the cloudy blue eyes looking right up to him. Expecting a slap or '_I can't believe you drugged and molested me!_' – something along those lines, he was surprised when Roxas turned and closed the distance between them, pressing their chests together. He didn't care when the mess of Roxas's seed spread, he didn't care _at all_ because the blond was crawling onto him, holding him down and tugging his tight jeans down.

"Are you still high?" Axel chuckled awkwardly, using his question to distract the sudden pink creeping to his face, but it only darkened when Roxas shook his head; obviously telling the truth by the way his pupils were regaining shape. He gulped; suddenly feeling dominated as Roxas was already straddling and positioning himself. "W-what are you doing?"

"_I want you_ –" he exhaled the words, his head falling back as his body lowered. It was almost surprising. Almost.

"R-Roxas, stop!" Axel somehow managed to hold onto the smaller before he was able to penetrate. He pulled him forward and onto him, holding him close. "I didn't want it to go this far – not yet."

"But _I_ want you…" Roxas nuzzled the red hair, his stubby nails trailing the red hairs on Axel's abdomen.

"Roxas," Axel pulled the blond to eyelevel, keeping his voice stern. "Stop this – you don't want to do this like this. I'm sorry, okay?"

His blue eyes took barely any time in glossing over and regaining total shape. The wetness that gathered into the corner of his eyes fell down his cheeks and his chin quivered. Axel sighed, pressing the blond against him tightly; not caring about the mess anymore or the fact that Roxas was sobbing on top of him, both naked.

He tugged the blanket that draped the top of the sofa down and over them. He knew this part of the drug too well – the ending. The part where everything comes back tenfold. All he needed was to know Axel was here for him and he would be okay; this was part of the experience.

"I love you, Roxas." He mumbled into the blond hair before placing a kiss against the wrinkled forehead.

The blond didn't respond, he only sobbed. It wouldn't take long until he passed out. Then he'd wake up and he wouldn't remember a thing – he wouldn't remember this night or how he even got here. Hopefully he wouldn't even remember what happened with Riku and he could use this as his chance to sort it all out.

* * *

**I felt a bit morbid and needed to express it somehow.  
**Don't do drugs – seriously, and don't go doing them because I wrote about it or anything. I just needed some way to get this creepy feeling out. I warned you of drug use before you started reading so please don't spam the comments with stupid shit.  
Otherwise, I wrote half of this before my fiancé and I's break up and half after – so the writing is a bit different. Sorry for that and sorry if you don't like this chapter but oh shwell. C:  
Thanks to everyone who wished me well.


	16. Star-crossed Skins

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 16: Star-crossed Skins

* * *

_Tells himself he can't be lonely 'cause he's never on his own,  
But all the friends he makes at night, in the morning they are gone,  
And he's left with his four walls, his aching head, his silent phone._

Axel awoke alone that morning. The soft blond that slept in his arms was nowhere to be found and a part of him panicked that Roxas could be out doing something devious, or he could have gone home pissed off royally. Either way didn't make anything better.

With a sigh, he pulled on his coat and boots and slapped the stereo switch to 'off'. He'd have to make do with the clothes he wore yesterday and the migraine that followed into the morning. Roxas was more important anyway… and Gods he hoped Roxas wasn't pissed off at him.

He remembered last night; drugging Roxas was a terrible idea.

Cursing himself, he swung the door open and nearly ran into the short figure. Again, he cursed, but this time at the fact he bowed over the blond, spun on his heels and fell against the railings.

"Shit," Axel pushed from the rails and stood upright. "Roxas, what are you doing out here?"

Blue eyes glimmered before blinking, a soft smile spreading across those pink lips before he held up two steaming paper cups. "I got us coffee." He said with a joyful ring to his voice.

Of course he felt irritable, but pushing those feelings aside Axel allowed himself to smile and take the offered cup.

"You could have woken me up before you left." He pushed the apartment door back open and waited for Roxas to walk inside before following him and shutting the door behind himself.

"Sorry." Roxas smiled before burying his lips against the cup.

"Do you," Axel started skeptically. "Do you remember last night?"

The youngest stilled, froze in a moment before setting his cup down and nodding.

"Are you… mad at me?"

Roxas shook his head. "I found out… last night I want to leave things behind. I want to move on with you, Axel." He smiled, taking the redhead's boney hands in his and smiling at them. "I've missed home for too long and now I just want to forget about everything."

"That's… good." Axel wasn't sure how to respond but humored Roxas's idea anyway with a smile.

"I want you to make me forget."

"How would I do that?"

Roxas's thin smile turned into a grin before he rolled his eyes. "Just stay with me."

The eldest joined him in a grin, nodding. "Easy."

"No more drugging me." Roxas said with a slight jester tone; but Axel knew he was fully serious, to which Axel nodded, agreed and apologized.

"So what do we do today?" Roxas sat his cup down before crossing the bar, leaning against the opposite side Axel was standing on. The redhead sighed, running his fingers through his lazy spikes before resting against the bar.

"Well…" he thought about it. There really wasn't much to do, and Roxas was probably still sore from Riku throwing him around. He shook that name out of his head; it was too early to get pissed off that bad. "We could…" still, he hadn't had a thought come to mind. With a shrug he lifted his eyes to look to Roxas.

Roxas adjusted his weight on his other leg, huffing before crossing his arms. "We could see what Sora is up to… I mean it is my fault that him and Riku aren't able to hang out anymore."

A single red brow rose. "How so?"

"Cloud told Sora not to bring Riku around anymore."

"I don't see how that's a bad thing."

"Sora really liked Riku." Roxas admitted with a sigh. "I didn't mean for –"

"Roxas," Axel interrupted, running his fingers across his forehead. "Riku is an asshole. There's nothing you could have done to change that. It's probably best that you got them separated anyway. He would have hurt Sora."

"Mh, I guess."

Axel crossed the bar, stopping behind Roxas and pulling him into a gentle embrace. "I know what we can do." He mumbled into the blond hair, behind Roxas's ear. "Let's get Sora, and let's go to the zoo."

"I've never been to the zoo." Roxas admitted with a pout.

Axel breathlessly chuckled. "Good, I'm breaking your zoo hymen."

"What? Gross!"

The two shared a quick laugh before Axel pulled away. "Let's go take a shower then." Axel extended his hand; a narrow smirk playing on his face.

"T-together?" Roxas took a step back as Axel nodded. "But…"

"Bashful?" Axel remembered last night; the way Roxas was even when the drugs were wearing off, wanting him and crawling on him. There was no doubt that Roxas had his own demons somewhere in those ocean-like blue eyes. There was darkness in there that Axel wanted to uncover – and not just through sex.

Roxas tensed before pouting, snatching Axel's hand into his before marching towards the direction of the bathroom. Behind him the redhead was grinning until they stepped into the bathroom. He stifled his excitement and looked to Roxas with the most serious expression.

"You don't have to, I was teasing, dear." He placed a kiss to the blonde's forehead. He started to turn but Roxas tugged on his jacket sleeve, yanking him back into the bathroom before looking up into those emeralds.

It was Axel's turn to tense up when said blond started peeling off his own jacket, letting it pool to the floor before he removed his shirt hastily. All the while he didn't break eye contact with Axel.

"Roxas, really –" he was interrupted by Roxas's abrupt laughter. It wasn't his usual chuckle or giggle, it was a bark of a hoarse voice Axel had never heard before. Taken aback, Axel silenced and watched Roxas's head fall forward. His laughter got loud enough to echo in the small room and ring painfully in Axel's eardrums before his voice broke and cracked into sobs with frail hands coming up to cover his eyes.

"Rox…" Axel stepped forward, cautiously pulling the younger member into his arms. His stilled hands moved in small circles on his boyfriend's bare back while his chin rested on top of the tremoring blond head. "Come on," he spoke softly and guided Roxas to the toilet, closing the lid before setting him down.

He watched as Roxas lifted his legs and hugged his knees, withering together. With a sigh, he turned and twisted the knobs of the tub onto a right temperature, plugging it and turning back to the said boy. He motioned for him to stand, which Roxas complied while hugging himself.

Axel didn't need to say much; Roxas read him like a novel – not just any book. Still, the redhead moved so cautiously, as if Roxas was slowly breaking and the slightest touch would crumble him. Gently, he fumbled with the belt of Roxas's pants before unbuttoning them, letting them pool at his feet. Shoes, then tugging the pants down. Socks, then finally his underwear.

Once bare, Axel made it clear that he wasn't looking at any of Roxas's sensitive zones. Still, blue eyes watched him sharply as the lanky figure guided him to filling tub and assisted him to seat in the steaming water. By this point Roxas didn't seem to mind being watched.

Pale skin pinked and swelled at the contact with the hot water, still; Roxas didn't complain. He hugged him knees to his chest while Axel excused himself, returning with a large glass cup.

He ran his fingers through Roxas's dry hair before raising the now filled cup, making it obvious of his intentions before carefully pouring the water against the nape of his neck. Slowly, he raised the pouring water repeatedly until Roxas's entire head of hair was drenched.

Trembles wracked Roxas's body as his soft crying turned into heart wrenching sobs. As badly as Axel wanted to hear the words from his voice, he knew everything that was wrong. The move, finding out Axel was a killer, his friends, Riku and hurting Sora. Surely there was more that he didn't all know about. He had a hunch that Roxas wasn't telling him the full story about his parents.

The fine-lined scars tracing on Roxas's back didn't seem to undoubt his mind a bit either. He hadn't even noticed them before. They were in perfect horizontal lines across his spine; from nape to tail-bone. They were deep, too - white skin with dotted pink. There was definably something Roxas wasn't spitting out.

But that was a story for another day.

* * *

_Way-too-long Author Notes;_**_First: add me on facebook if you'd like for better updates. Just add www . facebook / sn4kepit_**

**_Just take out the spaces, you know. Or just add /sn4kepit to the end of a facebook url._**

_I got the bathing scene from Skins (hence title). Hehe. My writing sucks ugh._

_So! How long has it been? *pets everyone's face* I've come crawling out of my cave at last. Ugh I'm so soooore; I've been doing nothing but sleeping and partying this entire time. It feels so good to be single again. Now it's time to creep up on some booties. _

_No but seriously; I feel great. My ex and I have agreed to be really good friends and it's gone extremely well. I've got in touch with old friends and started going back out and doing things with people. I'm also going on vacation sometime soon (I'll let you guys know before I go). But yeah; my life's been spunky. How have you guys been? Lemme know in the comments and sorry for taking foreverrrrr._

_OH AND DOES ANYONE WATCH AMERICAN HORROR STORY? LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT YO._

**_I promise I won't take so long to update again._**


	17. Faux Pas

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 17: Faux Pas

* * *

_I tie my hands up to a chair so I don't fall that way.  
Yeah, yeah, and I'm alright, I took a sip of something poison but I'll hold on tight.  
You were impatient, I was insecure._

For once they slept in the bed; though Axel wasn't as happy about it as he thought he would be. Roxas had put up a fight about doing something with Sora, went hysterical and Axel had to eventually pin him to the bed and hush him to sleep. Now he nestled between Axel's legs, his head resting on his stomach with a towel wrapped around his hair.

It's not like he had slept, though.

Carefully, Axel rolled over and gently laid Roxas on the bed. Silently, he went to the bathroom where Roxas's clothes laid and sighed a relieved sigh when Roxas's phone was still in his jacket pocket. After taking it he crept past the sleeping blond and into the livingroom.

With grinded teeth and a sour expression, he carefully slid the glass balcony doors open and just as carefully slid them closed. The last thing he wanted was to wake Roxas back up.

He exhaled a held in breath and shivered to himself. It was practically suicide to step outside in this kind of weather with just a t-shirt and boxers on, but Axel somehow managed. He pushed the concern for himself out of mind and instead leaned against the railings, flipped through Roxas's phone until he came to Sora's contact and called.

It was 6 in the morning and the sun was just barely coming up; it's not like Sora could really get upset, especially if he thinks its Roxas calling him. After three rings the phone immediately picked up.

_Rox where the fuck are you? Cloud is so pissed. _

Axel's heart skipped. _Shit_. "It's Axel actually –"

_Is Roxas okay? Is he with you?_

"Yeah, he's safe," it wasn't an entire lie. "I need to talk to you about him though."

_What's wrong?_ Sora's voice sounded wound up and tense.

"Sora, what _else_ is going on with Roxas?"

_What do you mean?_

He sighed. "I mean… he's kind of lost it."

_What do you mean?_ Sora repeated, sternly.

"I mean –" another sigh. "You've had to have noticed how weird he's acting."

_He's been through a lot._

"Yeah I know. But… he's getting worse. He had two freak-out sessions today."

…_Everyone has those, Axel._

"But…" his throat tightened. "What if he needs, like… rehab?"

At that moment he could hear Sora's voice transition into a yell; definably at Axel. With a wince, he pulled the phone away from his ear and in that next moment he could barely see the pale blond scurrying away from the other side of the glass door.

He cursed himself before hanging up on Sora and bolted through the door, sliding it open so hard he was sure it could have broken. Roxas was already at the front door, dressed and all and ready to walk right out of it if Axel hadn't hurried over and slammed it shut.

"Rox –"

"I don't want to hear it!" Roxas snapped before snatching his phone out of Axel's hands. "I don't want to hear you; I don't want to see you! I've had it."

"Stop you don't mean –"

"Get out of my fucking way!" His voice hoarse and unspent tears resided in the lower of his eyes.

"No," Axel calmly said, his hand still flatly pressed to the door. "Look, Roxas, just lis –"

"Fuck you," Roxas's voice lowered into a sneer. "Fuck you for everything – fuck you for acting like you gave a shit and fuck you for everything you've done. Let me the fuck go or I'm calling the police."

Axel's heart skipped again at the mention of law being brought into this. "Roxas, _please_."

"You want to send me to rehab so bad you had to call my cousin?" Roxas's eyes narrowed as he crossed his arms. "You couldn't talk to me?! GO AHEAD AXEL, I _DARE_ YOU!"

The redhead shoved away from the door, taking the said blonde's shoulders before harshly shoving him against the door. His eyes flickered from left to right as he watched blue eyes cry and perfect teeth grit.

"Calm down, okay?" Axel pleaded with desperate eyes.

"I am calm," Roxas mocked his tone. "So calm you'd think I'm on _drugs_."

He was sure that stung, and with that, Roxas's hands were brought up to the redhead's chest before he shoved harshly. Axel didn't stop him this time; he watched Roxas slip out of the door and slam it shut behind him.

Roxas released a trembling breath as the chill of outside hit him. A short thump from inside the redhead's apartment made him jump before he started his trot down the stairs. It was cold, no doubt; snow storm warnings were in the area, but he had no other choice in getting home.

With a sniffle, he collected himself and made his way down the snow covered sidewalk.

There was nothing else to do but call Sora now, maybe wait for his punishment when he got home and to wish like hell Cloud didn't take him out to get some kind of piss test.

He held his phone in his hands, looking down on it. Sora thought he was crazy now.

_He couldn't go home. _

"Hey!"

Roxas turned sharply on his heels, scanning the blinding whiteness until he came across the barely visible red blob. In his head, he had plans to run; until the redness disappeared and was replaced with silver. He squinted his bruised eyes and stepped forward.

"Roxas?" Riku held a red helmet underneath his arm. Roxas nodded, taking a step back now. He could barely hear Riku sigh. "I would ask what you're doing out here… but it's too cold. Are you walking?"

Again, he nodded.

"Then come on, let's go somewhere warm."

Did he really have a choice? He took Riku's offered hand and stumbled through the snow until he was guided to a large yellow truck. A construction truck, it looked like. He didn't question it one bit as Riku helped him into the truck and shut the door; he relished in the warmth.

"What were you doing out there?" Riku slid into the opened drivers side.

Roxas shrugged. "What are _you_ doing out here?"

"This is my job," he said dumbly. "I make sure idiots like you don't get caught in the storm."

"Oh." Blue eyes averted to the floor of the car and thin lips remained closed. Riku sighed before adjusting some stick shift and turning the keys, the sound of a roaring engine started up.

"I don't want to go home." Roxas blurted out, still refusing to make eye contact.

Another sigh from Riku. "My place it is then."

Roxas hummed in acknowledgement and offered a thin smile.

"So again," Riku pressed to the gas, slowly driving through the thick snowfall. "What are you doing here?"

"Nothing."

"Axel kicked you out." He stated more than asked.

"No," Roxas's brows furrowed. "We…" he glanced to Riku who had his eyes locked to the road, a red helmet resting tightly over his silver locks. Observing again, he could still see the swelling on Riku's face. "Broke up." He mindlessly said before touching his own face where Riku had hit him.

"You were right." He finally admitted.

"What did he do?"

"He thinks I'm crazy." Roxas waited for Riku to look at him; it was almost gut-wrenching that he wasn't. "He gave me… drugs." Hesitantly, he spit it out. "Please don't tell Sora."

Riku's straight face broke into a strange smirk as a winded laugh slipped through his teeth. "I couldn't talk to Sora even if my life relied on it." Finally, turquoise eyes glanced at his. "What'd he give you?"

"I don't know."

"What did it look like?"

"I can't remember."

Riku sighed in frustration. "Oral, injection, what?"

"I ate it."

"So it was a pill?" Roxas shook his head. "Acid?" Roxas shrugged. "Sounds like Axel to do something like acid. Fucking freak… Whatever, here's our stop anyway."

Roxas glanced from Riku and to the window. It was Riku's house and he was thankful for that. Despite how much he was sure Riku didn't like him, and how much he hated him, he was more than thankful.

His thoughts were broke off with Riku opening his door, again his hand extended in an offer that he took as he was being helped down from the large truck. He plopped down, his feet sinking into the thick snow with a quick cry.

"Fuck, are you stuck?" Riku's voice was raised over the gushing winds. After a few seconds, Roxas nodded, his hands digging into the eldest's shoulders. He watched with strained eyes as Riku peeled off his own jacket, revealing his tanned arms and a black vest he wore underneath it.

"Okay," Riku finally said as those arms flexed around Roxas's waist. "I'm gonna need you to cooperate." Roxas nodded. "Wrap your arms around my neck." He did so, wrapping them tightly and burying his face into the crook of Riku's neck. "Alright…"

It didn't take much effort for Riku to raise Roxas; but once Roxas had been lifted, Riku had been almost ankle deep in snow. He assured Roxas it was okay before shaking his feet out of the snow but they still had a few moments to share an ironic laugh.

"Inside," Riku shoved Roxas lightly as they started a jog towards the front door, both exhaling a sigh of relief when the warmth of inside hit them.

"I'm home," the eldest shouted through the house. Seconds later Aqua's head popped out from one of the doorways in the hallway. She seemed to have gone back inside but came back out, fully, as if to do a double take.

"Roxas?" She asked, stepping closer. "What're you doing here?"

"He was walking in the middle of a snow storm." Riku answered for him.

"What? Why?"

Roxas opened his mouth, only to close it.

"Your little friend Axel drugged him."

Aqua's eyes widened. "He did not!" Blue met blue. "Roxas, did he?"

Hesitantly, he nodded, breaking eye contact.

"What the fuck?" She crossed her arms and her brows furrowed in a distressed manner.

"I tried to warn you guys," Riku threw his hands up before walking away from the two, disappearing behind one of the doorways in the hallway Aqua had come from. Roxas tried to hurriedly explain the situation without giving much detail; definably leaving out the part about Axel getting him off.

"I'm really sorry that happened Roxas, I didn't know he'd be like…" Aqua sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. With a shake of the head she turned and walked back into the room she had come from. The moment her door closed, Riku had leaned from another door across from hers.

"Come on," he waved for Roxas to come, which he did. Stopping at the doorway, Riku had fully pulled him inside before shutting the door behind him.

Roxas observed the large room. It was like any teenager's room. Band posters plastered everywhere, clothes piled in corners and even a bong rested on the nightstand. He shook his head playfully to the strange expression on Riku's face as he scurried to put that away.

"What are we doing?" Roxas asked, a bit of panic in his voice while he watched Riku strip from his vest and jeans before slipping into the bed and under the covers. He tried not to look, he decided to analyze the room instead until Riku was tucked underneath some blankets.

"I'm sleeping," he said before rubbing his face. "You've got to be tired."

"But it's morning…"

"So?" Riku smirked, lifting the blankets as an offer for Roxas to come under. "I'm not Axel."

Roxas's heart inflated with that comment as he found himself slowly making way closer to the tanned boy. With one last choked up clearing of his throat, he slipped his own shoes and jacket off and slid into the offered space. He was able to stay a decent space away from Riku, to which he sighed a breath of relief for.

"Tense." Riku mumbled.

Roxas looked over to see Riku lying on his back with his eyes closed. "No." He lied before a wry chuckle passed his lips. "How did I even end up here?"

"By car." Riku replied sarcastically, a smile forming.

"I'm sorry." Blue eyes locked onto the swollen flesh underneath Riku's eye.

"Forget it. Shit happens." He said, eyes still closed. "Besides… you can put a good word in for me for not letting you freeze to death."

Roxas hummed in acknowledgement and offered a small smile before turning over on his side, his back facing Riku. With one last sigh he closed his own eyes and pulled the blanket to his face. His stomach churned as he wondered how Sora would react knowing that he was lying in bed with his ex-boyfriend…

_What would Axel say?_

* * *

_Author Notes; my third person writing sucks. I should have made this first person while I had the chance.  
oh well. I told you guys I wouldn't have you hanging for looong. hope you enjoy the drama-bomb coming up in the next few chapters._


	18. Sleepyhead

The Pure and the Tainted  
Chapter 18: Sleepyhead

* * *

_Axel._

Pale lids slowly peeled open to reveal bright blue eyes, glancing from every corner of the room until he came to the realization the green eyes he had seen was just a dream. Disheartedly, he lifted himself from the small bed and immediately shrugged off the tan arm hooked around him. The action had earned a groan from the teen behind him; luckily only stirring in his sleep and not waking up.

Even if it wasn't his room; his natural instinct was to look for the nearest clock. Time had always been an important factor. You could lose it or make it, waste it or give it up. No matter what though you couldn't get it back – and that was Roxas's bad habit. Wasting it.

It was 7 pm now, and peeking out of the window he could see that it was already pitch black. At least it looked like the storm had passed. With that in mind, he collected his thoughts and listened to the soft breathing of Riku behind him.

"This is wrong," he whispered more to himself before cupping his hands over his face and rubbing the heel of his hand into his closed eyes. He shouldn't be in bed with his cousin's ex-boyfriend – the whole reason this was his ex was because he had fucked everything up. This situation looked worse than what it was. Telling them what Axel had done was wrong, too… now there was no taking it back.

He pulled his phone out of the jacket he had thrown to the floor and flicked through screens until he got to his contacts. Axel was naturally the first contact; scrolling a little bit more came Hayner, Olette, Pence and then Sora; his 4 most vital contacts. The trivia was which one was the best to call in this situation? He flicked back to Axel and hovered his finger over the name – but back to Olette, he promised to call her back. Sora? He thinks he's crazy. Back to Axel; would he even understand? Maybe Pence could be a neutral party.

"Fuck it," he quickly flipped up to Axel's name before tapping the name, letting the call go through before he picked up his shoes and jacket and hastily made his way out of the bedroom. The earshot of the news station confirmed his assumption of the storm behind over; also Aqua was passed out of the couch with Kairi – which means Roxas either did something very well, or very awkward. He neverminded it for now as he quietly slipped out of the doorway and into the chill.

His shoes fell to the concrete porch with a thud before he closed the door. He pressed the phone to his ear while he slipped his shoes and jacket on, taking no time in stepping out into the snow covered front lawn and onto the sidewalk.

_Yo, you've reached Ax – _

He hung up with a sigh only to dial the number again, only to get voicemail again. "Come on, Axel… pick up." He mumbled to himself as he passed through every streetlight. At the least, he knew Axel's complex wasn't far from Riku's house and it would be easy to at least wait at the front door if nothing else. He had to come outside sometime, right?

He sighed before ending the call and shoving the phone back into his jacket pocket, and as if right on cue the familiar maroon Ferrari came to a screeching halt right next to the blonde. Instead of red spikes, damp chocolate spikes came bobbing towards him. The owner of said spikes placed his hands on Roxas's shoulders and pulled him into a spine-crushing hug that left him groaning in pain when his feet lifted from the ground.

"I thought you were dead!" Sora practically yelled into the crook of Roxas's neck and the wet that was dripping down Roxas's collarbone made it obvious his cousin was crying. "Why didn't you ring me?" Sora's usual childlike voice was hoarse and groggy. Every word sounded like a croak with the pauses he took to sniffle. Roxas opened his mouth to speak but closed it again when a glimmer of moving red caught his eye. Axel was jogging up from the direction that Sora had driven from with a flashlight in his hand.

"Where the fuck were you!" Axel pulled Roxas in when Sora pulled away and leaned over to fully wrap his arms around practically every inch of Roxas's thin waist. Absent mindedly Roxas returned the favor, wrapping his arms around Axel's neck and standing to his tippy toes to nuzzle the soft flesh between his neck and shoulder that was exposed from his loosely fitted sweater.

"Why didn't you call? Where were you?" Roxas looked to Sora before pulling softly away from Axel who hooked his arm around Roxas's shoulders.

"I did call." He held out his phone as if it were proof.

"Where _were_ you?"

His heart dropped a bit before shooting up at full speed into his throat. "Walking." The excuse poured out with anxiety. "I stayed with Kairi." It wasn't entirely a lie, was it? Kairi owed him one anyway. He looked to their faces for some kind of confirmation; finally observing just how flushed their faces were. Both of their noses were tinted cherry red and not a trace of color could be found anywhere else. The thought of them spending countless hours looking for him in the freezing cold; in a blizzard… it made his stomach twist for the fact that he was lying to them now.

A bit of relief overcame him when Sora exhaled and broke the silence. "Come on." A set of blue eyes flashed to green before they were following Roxas to the car. Sora got into the driver's side while Axel got into the passenger and gave Roxas no other choice than to be seated on his lap.

"How mad is Cloud?" Roxas mumbled as they shut their doors. Sora didn't respond, he only groaned and gave him the look; which was a look of furrowed brows and barred teeth. He sunk into Axel as if for some kind of comfort, some kind of protection for what was coming next. Even if it was useless, Axel took notice and wrapped his arms around the small teen, nuzzling his cold nose into the shaggy blond hair before placing a kiss there.

"I don't want to go home." It was like Roxas's motto now. That home wasn't his home; Cloud wasn't his father and it was lonely to always be alone in a home that didn't belong to you; a home that had no one worth being with.

"Sorry, Rox. I promised Cloud."

He internally groaned before clenching the loose fabric of Axel's sweater. He looked up to the redhead who looked as if he were fast asleep. They must have been tired if they were scavenging for nothing in the snow all day… because he had been at Riku's; sleeping in a bed with Riku. His eyes broke away from the peacefulness that Axel was bringing. He was guilty and the short car ride hadn't helped a bit.

Axel fidgeted a bit underneath once they had pulled up beside the Strife's home; signaling to make some sort of get up or to slide out of the car, but Roxas stayed put and locked eyes with him.

"Sora, will you give us a minute?"

Blue eyes connected for a moment before Sora nodded and sighed. "Don't take forever, I can only stall for so long."

Roxas nodded and watched as Sora slipped out of the car and shut the door. Once Sora had made it to the door, he looked back to Axel who had a puzzled look on his face. Without wasting another second, Roxas stripped his own jacket from his body and tossed it into the back seat. Axel's confused expression turned to stunned as Roxas straddled his lap, turning to face him completely.

"What are you doing?" He mumbled with a bit of coy in his voice. Roxas didn't respond; only to use his time wisely and attack the exposed flesh on Axel's neck. A soft exhale escaped the redheads lips before he tilted his head to better his access as Roxas trailed his tongue across the tendon of Axel's neck. He retreated his tongue along his path only to place kisses, wrapping his lips around what flesh he could and nipping at the irritated skin.

"Rox," he ignored the eldest, kissing back into the crook of his neck and against the lines of his jaw before slipping from his lap. Considering it was a tight space in the car, he had to spread Axel's legs before sliding into the floorboard and wriggling into a comfortable position. His hands occupied with trailing the insides of Axel's thighs and softly grabbing at the hardened lump between said thighs.

"You r-really don't have to do this… why are you even doing this?"

Those words had gone through the entire car, everywhere besides Roxas's ears because he was still quick at work and fumbling with the zipper to Axel's too-tight-for-Roxas's-taste pants. Luckily it hadn't taken long, and a tight groan emitted from Axel once his erection came free, only to be captured in Roxas's palm.

Being his first time, he hadn't taken any time in pumping Axel rather than barely lifting himself enough to take the shell of Axel's member between his lips. He wrinkled his nose at the salty taste and wet texture that was oozing from his slit, but withstood it because of the throaty moans Axel was providing. He mentally counted every inch he was taking in; only estimates but he hoped close enough.

One inch quickly turned into four before he found himself getting carried away, sitting upright on his knees and bobbing his head quickly and in a steady rhythm with Axel's bucking hips. He earned moan after moan, his name mumbled and long fingers tangled painfully into his hair. That was encouragement enough to relax his throat and take those four inches into the very hilt. At least 6 or 7 inches, he hoped.

With a held back gag, he rested at the very base and pressed his fists to Axel's hips. The redhead was twitching slightly underneath his lips, his legs wrapped around Roxas and when blue met green through eyelashes Axel's head fell back.

"I can't – Roxas, I –"

He used that as a signal, bringing his head upwards slowly and closing his lips against the swollen flesh while he did so. One last time, he pushed his head back down, again taking him into the hilt before those fingers gripped even tighter and boney hips jerked upwards; the sound of a climaxing redhead echoing in the small car. Axel's essence sprayed hotly into his throat as he forced himself to relax and swallow most of what he could. When he felt he couldn't breathe anymore is when he lifted his head; his lips popping at the retreat and what little bit of essence did escape his lips he licked up, chuckling when Axel groaned.

The death grip on Roxas's hair was released and replaced with a tender touch from his head, to his cheek until his fingers were underneath Roxas's chin, leaning his head up to place a soft kiss against his lips.

"Gross," Roxas smiled against Axel's lips before opening the car door and squeezing out. He stumbled a bit before he found his footing and leaned against the car door with a sigh. Axel had already adjusted his pants and had them zipped up by the time he stepped out of the car.

Roxas pressed his head to Axel's warm chest and relished in the feeling of his lover's arms wrapping around him, his hands smoothing the spikes in his hair and soft lips kissing his throbbing eyelids before pulling away.

"I'll come pick you up tomorrow. If you're not grounded." Axel smiled, oblivious to the lurching in Roxas's stomach as he masked it with a smile.

"Yeah," Roxas stood on his tippy toes, placing a kiss to the side of Axel's lips.

"I love you, Roxas."

He smiled a guilty smile. "I love you, Axel."

Axel offered a smile before crossing the car and getting into the driver's side. Roxas shut the passenger door before backing away and waving; watching Axel pull out of the driveway and disappearing somewhere behind the darkness. Dreaded, he turned on his heels and made his way towards the front door. Opening it revealed a frantic blond beside a nervous brunette; obvious that Sora had been doing his best to stall.

Still, Cloud came hurrying over and brought Roxas into another spine crushing embrace.

"Where were you? I was worried sick! The phones were down, and where's your jacket?" Cloud pulled away only to lock eyes with Roxas, who was too busy looking at Sora.

"I need to talk to Sora."

Cloud looked from Roxas, turning to look at Sora who only gave him a shrug. "As long as you're okay… it's not like I can keep up with you kids anyway." He took a step back before turning and walking down the hallway. The sound of hurt was obvious in his voice, only causing the guilt to gnaw at his stomach even worse.

"What's wrong?" Sora pulled out a stool for himself and Roxas, who hesitantly took it.

"I wasn't at Kairi's."

"Then where?"

"I was at," he broke eye contact and turned his stool to look completely away from Sora. "Riku's. He found me after I had left Axel's. I only went there because I thought… I thought you would hate me and Axel didn't want me anymore." He paused only to glance to his cousin. Sora's eyes were half lidded and staring down at the floor.

"That's stupid." Sora blurted out in a mumble before Roxas had the chance to open his mouth again. "But why did you lie to Ax – no, stupid question. I understand."

"Do you?"

Sora looked up to meet Roxas's eyes. "Haven't I always?"

They shared a thin smile before breaking gazes away again. Roxas's fingers fumbled with one another on the countertop while Sora's hands laid lazily in his lap, looking the completely opposite direction of Roxas. Needless to say, the silence wasn't helping Roxas's guilt go away.

"How is he?" Sora had asked so faintly he wasn't sure he had been hearing things.

"He's okay."

"Is he really?"

Roxas nodded. "He wanted me to put in a good word for him to you."

Sora broke out into a small smile, still looking just as fragile but sincere. "Yeah. He saved your life."

"Yeah." Roxas confirmed to heal any doubt Sora had. "He's not a bad guy… all in all. I don't know what he has against Axel but, don't let his conflict with me keep you two apart. Please." Roxas turned to face the brunette who only shook his head.

"It's not because of you –"

"Yes it is! Sora, stop being so soft. I messed it up. It's my fault, I'm sorry okay?" He rose from the stool and held his hands to Sora's shoulders, forcing him to look up at him. "Don't let me ruin something for you again."

He left the words lingering before pulling away and hurrying down the hallway before Sora had a chance to utter another word. He closed his bedroom door and slid against it until he was seated to the ground. In an attempt to sleep he closed his eyes; not even minding if it was the floor he slumped onto. There would be school tomorrow and there's a certain redhead who was going to want answers when the time came.

* * *

_**Important author notes:  
**I've been tempted to discontinue this, but due to all your reviews and all of the follows I'm painfully digging in every corner of my mind to keep this going. So far, so good but the storyline was strayed a lot due to a loss of files, recent events and lack of motivation. So I'm trying to get the story back so bear with me. One day I'll rewrite all of , thanks everyone for sticking through with my bullshit for this long._  
_If it seems like I'm restarting to story; spelling out pointless things and recapping, this is why._  
_ANYWAY. Have a fellatio to make up for it._

_Not-so-important author notes; I should also mention that in the times my writing got shitty, was the times that I was depressed. So, I'm definably fixing this. Seriously; thanks everyone for being so kind and giving lovely reviews for my shitty writing, aha. One of my closest friends and I have been going out lately now though and he's bringing a little bit of motivation back to my little black heart. c:_


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